Myersville Population 7

I hope, I hope (resolutions be damned)

2011-01-01T23:02:00.001-06:00

I hope:
that I can lose 20 more pounds and keep it off
that karma bites that nasty woman in her ass
that we don't get any more vehicles stolen or have any money issues
to be able to go the temple more
to be a better wife, mother, daughter, and friend
to be on Facebook less
that I don't have to attend any more funerals (4 in one calendar year is 4 too many..)
that my big sister can get clean
that Jon and my kids will be at my side every Sunday at church
that Chan will get a JOB and finally start school...
that I can get a tummy tuck and breast lift
that me and Jon will pretty please be able to go on a trip for our 15th anniversary
that my house will sell and we'll move to the right place for the right price

Really though, as much as I want all of the above, I just want to be HAPPY and I want to SMILE more. I want me and my family to get along and be together as often as possible and I want us to be HEALTHY and UNITED.
Happy New Year Y'all!

She's baaaaaaacccckkkk!

2010-10-10T22:22:00.000-05:00

Don't get too excited, I may up and quit before the week is out... But, either way- I thought I'd re-acquaint y'all with me. So, here goes.

I am a feisty redheaded mom of 5. I used to be a FAT chick, but am now what I consider chubby, if a size 12 is chubby. I used to weigh 270 at my highest and now weigh 175. I am addicted to Mexican food, pretzel M&M's, Diet Coke, kissing my baby (because he's the only one that can't get away) and my daily walks. I don't really have any talents to speak of- I can't cook, sew, scrapbook, take good pictures, etc etc. I am however a loyal friend and I think I'm pretty damn funny, so there! I am very good at- long bubble baths, Facebook, and window shopping. Right now my house is for sale and my hubby just started another job and cut his hours at his primary job. So, we are broke and it sucks. But, what can you do? I tried my hand at home-schooling my daughter but I felt tied down and she was bored so now, it's just me, my baby, and my oldest son who is both out of school AND unemployed. It's a barrel of fun. Not really. I hope to pick blogging up again full time. I can't promise I'll stick to it. I really hope I can provide a sounding board for myself and a laugh for y'all. If I am feeling ambitious I may fancy up my background and such and if y'all are lucky- I might even post some pictures. Don't count on it though. One thing I realized after having another baby- my kids are the boss around here not me. I'm just glad I get to eat and periodically shower....

Weight Loss Progress

2010-08-09T17:51:00.004-05:00

For those of you on Facebook, this is old news. But, I'm posting it here anyways...

This is me when Cam was 6 weeks old and me as of July. I have lost 75 pounds since the day he was born. As of late April I am at 40 pounds lost and over 20 inches! Yay me! I am saving for a tummy tuck and breast lift, for reals. If I can get down to 145, I'm meeting with a surgeon. I am at 190 now. 45 more to go....

P.S. I suck at making photo collages....

Bye, for now...

2010-08-09T16:46:00.026-05:00

Well, you had to know this was coming. I'm saying Bye Bye Bye to my blog for now. Even though I rarely if ever post and probably have little to no readers, I wanted to formally say- see ya! I really wanted to keep my blog updated, I just can't. I APPLAUD those of you who keep yours updated- I admire y'all and thoroughly enjoy reading about your families and experiences. Keep it up! I am just overwhelmingly busy with my life right now. I am constantly breastfeeding, washing dishes, doing laundry, cooking, tending to Camden or exercising. If I'm lucky I might be able to shower or read a magazine... I don't even get to chat or hang out with my older kiddos as often as I'd like. Used to, when I first started blogging, I had my camera all the time and a list of blog ideas. Now, I rarely even sit at the computer. I have joked that I was cheating on my blog with Facebook, and it's true. If cell phones weren't so darn internet friendly I wouldn't even be on Facebook either. Believe it or not- this is actually very emotional for me. I have met some amazing people through blogging (Sarah, Shannon, Krista- to name a few) and will miss it terribly. Thanks again for friendship, laughter, and the support and well wishes you have shown me in the 3 years I've been a blogger. Don't give up on me though- keep me on a reader or in your favorite's list. I just may surprise you and become A Blogging Queen someday- like say if I reach my goal weight or get pregnant again (as if) or win the lottery (I wish). Love y'all! It's been AMAZING!

P.S. I'm now 190lbs (have lost 40 pounds and 20 inches)!
Hunter is starting high school!
I might be home-schooling Chloe!
Hayden turned expert in BMX!
Camden is fixing to be 1 and is taking steps here and there!
Jon has lost 20 pounds since he started working two jobs!
and, Chan is finding that adulthood is not all rainbows and lollipops...

P.S.S. if you want to keep reading about my family and antics, add me on Facebook if we're not already friends, I promise I won't think you're weird....

Some current photos!

me and Cam

I recently met some friends from high school for dinner, so much fun!

Chloe has pink hair! For summer only. On and she's officially a teenager now...

Hunter FINALLY cut his hair!

Cam can feed himself!

Because I am AWESOME!

2010-07-15T14:06:00.003-05:00

I have lost almost 35 pounds! I now weigh: 197.6! I haven't weighed this "little" since 1997. Anyway, just wanted to share. Ok, now go comment away telling me how proud you are and how awesome I am. Only if you feel like it ;)

HI!

2010-07-02T03:10:00.005-05:00

Yeah, so I'm even worse at blogging than before...oops! I am not gonna make an excuse, just know that with 5 kids time for myself is sparse.
So- here's the rundown:

I am absolutely obsessed with weight loss. I'm 2 pounds away from being under 200 and I couldn't be happier! Yes I could- if I was 140. I am hoping I can get there by January. My total weight loss is 28.4 pounds and just over 12 inches, 5 of those in my hips alone... As long as I get in some exercise, don't go over my calories, and my chores are done I'm good. Oh yeah, I do try to hang with the kids as much as possible.
Jon is working ALL THE TIME and he is the #1 playmate around here, so the kids are bored out of their minds. I'm having a hard time thinking of inexpensive activities for kids ranging from 9 months to 18 years. Our pool is green- we are missing an important part that helps the pool stay chlorinated so swimming is out. I can't take Cam to movies so that's out. Jon used to be off on Wednesdays and during summer that was our big family activity day, but no more. The X-box broke so video games are out. So, we're kinda bummed and blah. It's bugging the kids more than me since I'm so focused on weight loss.

Chan is having a hard time finding job, which stinks. He might be living here til he's 30... we'll see. He spends most of his time reading and playing guitar. He is also working on his weight and has lost 15 pounds since graduation.

Chloe, Hunter, and Hayden are just chillin' every day. Fighting over the computer, sleeping too late and being annoying.

Cam is FINALLY sleeping in his crib at night. He cried quite a bit at first but has done fairly well. Last night he slept for 11 hours without waking up! He still naps in my arms, the car, or the stroller. But, Rome wasn't built in a day right? He is cruising furniture like crazy, crawling everywhere and his two words are dadada and lalala. Super cute! He also just got two teeth that have barely busted through his gums the last few days.

So, that's about it! I totally understand if NO ONE reads this anymore. And, comments? Who needs 'em? See y'all soon!

Me: on another diet

2010-06-11T15:51:00.007-05:00

Yeah, so I'm dieting again. This time, (crosses fingers) I am doing a little better than before. Amen to breastfeeding. Which I'm probably going to be doing until Camden starts kindergarten... Anyway, I am doing much like I did before when I lost a little over 20 pounds- watching portions, having mustard instead of mayo, lots of fresh fruit, only diet sodas, etc. I am allowing myself about 1500 calories per day, sometimes less sometimes more. I still need to maintain a good diet since Cam nurses ALOT. Which is ok with me, because I am losing it quicker than I thought I could. Why didn't I start this when he was 7 weeks old instead of 7 months old? Oh yeah- postpartum depression. Anyway... I normally wouldn't post my starting weight being the internet and all. But, what the hell? So here goes:

my highest non-pregnant weight- 258 (after my appendix surgery)
9 months pregnant weight- 270
weight when I started dieting- 231
weight now- 211.6

Yep, that's right! I have lost 19.4 pounds since April 15th (58.4 since I delivered Cam). It has been crazy- trying to count calories in addition to fitting in a 2 to 3 mile walk every day. The calorie counting has been pretty easy, thanks to an app called Lose It on my phone. The walks are another matter- it's stray angry dog city out here. But, I'm managing thanks to walking with some friends and a wooden sword from Medieval Times! Seriously though, I am so close to being under 200 it's crazy! I am pretty stoked especially since A) I havent weighed this amount since Chloe was 6 months old and B) I am at the smallest size Lane Bryant sells which means I can finally start shopping for clothes somewhere else! Yeehaw! Not that their clothes aren't cute, I'm just tired of that being one of the only places I can shop. I would dress totally different if my options for clothing weren't so limited. Plus, those fat girl clothes are expensive! All that extra fabric... So, wish me luck. I hope to be chosen for the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue next Summer. Not really.

He's got him a high school deeplomaaa!

2010-06-03T17:00:00.010-05:00

Oh my gosh... really. I cannot believe my Chan graduated high school. Not that I ever doubted him, not one bit. I am seriously dripping snot and tears as I type this. I guess I'm not good with change, or knowing that he's officially a big kid now and technically doesn't need me anymore. Basically the scissors are hovering near the apron strings and I'm trying to back away... All these years I knew it would hit me HARD when graduation day came. I had him my Senior year and didn't do the whole walk across the stage thing and this was like I graduated right along with him. I just can't believe I won't have to replace another school ID or wash his favorite dress code shorts at midnight or make him his favorite brown bag lunch again and that is making the lump in my throat bigger than it needs to be. I remember every single moment of his first day of kindergarten: he had sausage and pancakes and wore a black and white t-shirt with jeans and these little Payless brand tennis shoes. We even stopped at Sack -n- Save for kleenex because that's a "required" school supply item and I believe we got him an ultra groovy soccer backpack at S&S too. Weird. I was so afraid he was gonna cry and that little fart walked away from me and started coloring and said- "you can go now Mom". Umm, okay. And, he has continued to amaze me ever since- winning 3 spelling bees to reading Harry Potter and The Lord of the Rings in 2ND GRADE!! And, man oh man all the neat stories he would write. He has always loved literature and it wasn't until he was 15 that he developed a love of music and guitar. I am just so very happy that I have been able to get to know, teach, and love this kid and love that he teaches me too. I asked my friend Kathi earlier when the lump in my throat would go away and she said never, it just changes as life does and as you experience more and more as you live. Well put. However, I wish mine would simmer down a bit. I'm having a hard time breathing.

Anyway- yesterday was nuts! Typical for us of course but I think it was nuttier than normal. It was a very long day. Starting with Hayden's field day and ending with Chan's graduation. The venue was jampacked and parking was scarce. I ended up parking in a lot but then it started pouring and the attendant ducked for cover, so I never paid, oops. I had Hunter and Cam with me and my mom went in with Chloe and Jon, Hayden, and Chan had gotten there earlier. I was so afraid I was gonna miss him walking in but thankfully I was able to get in there in time. As soon as the music started I stood in amazement and bawled like a baby. And, let's see- I couldn't take my stroller in the stands, my carseat was blocking the aisle and Cam lost patience quick. All in all I was in and out of the stands about ten times. Getting out to leave was insane, I lost my whole family and was shoved many many times. Which, for a feisty redhead was not fun, I tried super hard to maintain my cool.... It was just a crazy night. I drove my mom back to Grand Prairie and scarfed down two Whataburger taquitos in her driveway, the first meal I'd had since noon and it was nearing midnight. Anyway- I am not sure what the future holds for Chan or any of us to be honest. But, I am sorta excited to find out!

about to take their seats for the ceremony

The Graduate!

our family

mama and her baby

the official document

Ding Ding Ding!

2010-06-03T16:51:00.003-05:00

We have our winners!

Laura- you've won the s'mores basket!

and

Kathi- you've won the outdoor fun basket!

Yay! Thanks for reading and entering and stuff!!

P.S. Laura- I will bring yours to church and Kathi- I can bring yours to GP or I can take it to Erica's :)

Summer Giveaway!

2010-05-28T15:36:00.005-05:00

As promised I am doing a giveaway in honor of 700 posts and because school is out in like, 4 days. Amen! I had all these grand plans for one of the baskets and life is just too busy to craft. Heck, I can barely find time to bathe... Anyway. Enter by leaving a comment indicating which basket you want. I'll devise a way to choose a winner and let you know via email if you've won. I'm starting the giveaway now and ending it whenever I darn well please. Or in other words- whenever I, A) remember and B) have time. I have two baskets to gift. One is a daytime fun basket- sidewalk chalk, water guns, water balloons, bubbles, and freezer pops. The other is a s'mores basket- s'mores forks, hershey bars, marshmallows, and graham crackers. If you want to enter both let me know or if you only want to try your luck at one please indicate. Ready. Set. Enter.

outdoor/daytime fun basket

s'mores basket

Holy Cow! 700 posts?!

2010-05-19T14:09:00.004-05:00

Oh crap! My life is INSANE lately. I cannot stress that enough. Jon started a second full time job on Monday and I have been playing single parent and it is HARD. He's been working 6am til about 8pm every night. My kids are driving me nuts- mainly my daughter and my baby. Chloe is just a giant teenage drama queen. Camden is so spoiled that not having his mommy to himself like normal has turned him into a ginormous cry baby. He has fussed so much this week that he is hoarse. Blah! My other kids, on the other hand, are being complete angels.
Anyway, I did want too acknowledge my 700th post! I cannot believe I was able to talk/type that much interesting (I hope) stuff. I am doing an awesome giveaway to kick off Summer. I am crossing my fingers that by tomorrow morning I'll have it ready to present.... I sure hope you've enjoyed reading all about my life- kids, husbands, babies, teenagers, periods and poop to name a few highlights! Now, I'm off to get kids from school and take Chan to his physical therapy appointment. Oh and Cam's out of baby food and I need to go to the DMV and I have to make cupcakes and buy a gift, and.... you get the point.
THANKS for reading! I love y'all to bits! Keep checking for my giveaway, it'll be on here before the goodies are obsolete, I hope.

Bleh

2010-05-12T08:11:00.002-05:00

Yeah, so I forgot to blog. Or something. I'm sure my previous post had nothing to do with me being tired, bloated, cranky, stressed, weepy and in no mood to blog. Oh no, Aunt Flo doesn't do that. She's a nice visitor. One who doesn't cause trouble or make messes and never overstays her welcome. Yeah right. Let's be honest- the last 5 days have been AWFUL. Basically I have been begging for menopause. Case closed. In other news- I am super bummed about LOST ending, I can't get Camden to sleep through the night without his (my) precious boobers, I've been walking 2 miles every night and my scale has a death grip on the exact same number while I have a death grip on anything and everything chocolate, and other than a few little happy spots, my Mother's Day was the worst one I have ever ever had. I really don't wanna go into detail, because I am all cried out. But, don't feel sorry for me, I am a big girl and as Jon told me- it's just a silly commercialized holiday. Ugghh. Men are so retarded. Tell me why we need them again? And, that's all I've got except for two teeny little things in my head. 1) does anybody know a plastic surgeon who wants to lift, tuck, and suck my body pro bono just because he/she is nice and I'm cute? It might be a tax write off for him/her. 2)This is my 699 post since August of '07 and I MIGHT do a giveaway to celebrate the BIG ONE. Maybe, but don't get too excited. I might decide to not blog again for a month or more. It all depends on what drama/loveliness might or might not get thrown my way.

men-stroo-ay-shun

2010-05-07T23:02:00.006-05:00

So I've been a hormonal mess the past few days. Nothing new really- I mean I had finally leveled out a little bit from when Camden was born and was feeling normal and then bam! I have been crying like a baby this week. Well, guess what? Aunt Flo decided to come for a visit for the first time since December of 2008. That's right internet- I got my period. I haven't missed it. Not One Bit. I guess it's time to revisit the feminine hygiene aisle of CVS and bust out the Midol. Oh freaking joy. And, if you are cringing at this post- who cares. Whose blog is this? Mine! And, I am hormonal- so look out, especially men named Jon.

I am a mom right?

2010-05-04T12:28:00.004-05:00

So, Mother's Day is coming. This year is different, since it was reaffirmed back in September that I am indeed some one's mommy. I think I had forgotten... I have always been a simple (boring) person and I have become even more low maintenance and boring than usual. I have heard having a baby does that to a girl. This year, just like last a big chunk of my family will be at BMX, because that is VERY important. I will likely be alone at church with Camden and I will go see my mommy as my boys who don't ride the bicycles or go to church don't really get the concept of the "holiday". I have to confess- I don't either. I think moms should always be honored and respected. It's always difficult to figure out what to do or where to go on Mother's Day because Jon and I obviously both have moms and we still haven't (after 15 years) figured out a workable family visitation for holidays. And, I have heard it a million times before- I am not his mom. So, with that being said, I really don't know what is going on Sunday. Ok, I think I may have gotten off on a tangent or on a soapbox- take your pick! The point of this post was that I am simple (boring) and would only like simple things for "my day".

My Mother's Day Wish List

I would like:

One night of uninterrupted sleep (no cuddling, no nursing, nothing). I just wanna sleep on my tummy and not have to get up for anything until 8 wondrous hours of slumber have commenced.

A foot rub. One that lasts, and one that I don't have to beg or pay for.

A glorious yummy meal consisting of all of my favorite foods (steak, shrimp, salads, cheesy stuff, avocado, chocolate, etc etc) that I can eat while it's fresh and hot and afterwards I don't get sick to my stomach. Not gonna hold my breath.

A gift certificate to the following- pedicure place, the hair salon, the massage place, my favorite shoe store, my favorite clothing store, and Target. HAHAHAHAHA! As my dad would say- you can wish in one hand and S*&T in the other.

A nice long bubbly bath with a cheesetastic magazine and all the hot water that my heart desires. If I could take it without Camden staring at my boobs or chewing on the empty shampoo bottle that would be a bonus.

A ginormous bouquet of sunflowers, my favorite flower (weed). So sunny and summery and cheerful!

And, I think that's all. While all those things sound amazing and stuff, what I really want is to be with my all my kiddos with no fighting or texting or crying or TV or computer or drama. I just want them to get IT ya know? I know that's asking alot but I can wish right?

mommy and baby

2010-05-02T01:07:00.008-05:00

Who wants to see a current picture of me and Camden? Hopefully YOU! Here you go. Oh, he might have a few boogers- this was before his bath and after mine. Jon and I got to leave the house tonight so I got to wear decent clothes and makeup. I might have even brushed my teeth. We went to a friend's 40th birthday party and stopped afterwards for Olive Garden to go. Hey, not the steak I was craving but who am I to complain?

I'm not looking at the camera mother!

this is soooo annoying...

Hey, what's that?

mommy, stop squishing my face!

here Cam, here's how you do it. Smile like mommy!

Dirty Day...

2010-04-27T17:55:00.006-05:00

No reason for this post other than I am kinda bored. Believe it or not. The middle kids are outside playing, Jon is reffing a soccer game, Cam is asleep, and my big boys are at friend's houses. I can't wash clothes or dishes. I can't cook. *I can't pack boxes. I can't really do anything. Ok, sweeping and dusting. But, that's mucho boringo. Why, you ask? We have been without water for about 6 hours. What does come out of the tap looks like diarrhea. Sorry, but it's true. I was gonna make homemade mashed potatoes with dinner- no water. I can't even make baked ones- no water to clean them with. I can't make anything that requires water, not even mac-n-cheese. Dang it. Not sure what to make now... Sandwiches anyone? And, I don't know how you are when the water is off for unexplainable reasons, but I really want to take a shower and I'm not even that dirty. Uggh... life in the "country" sorta sucks. And, that's all. I'm just trying to figure out what to do til someone either wakes up or comes home to play with me. Maybe I'll go for a walk, up and down the driveway since Cam is sleeping. Maybe we'll grab takeout and head to the park. Hmmmm...

the offensive "water"

*we are currently in the process of readying the house for sale, yikes! Wish us luck!

It's the small stuff...

2010-04-26T22:55:00.005-05:00

I am truly thankful for oh so many things and as I get older I realize more and more just how blessed I really am. I mention this every time I pray and occasionally make a public declaration via Facebook or Blogger. But, I don't take near enough time to express my thanks for the small stuff- until now. I am thankful for:

Target brand baby wipes- fresh smelling, inexpensive, and just as good as the name brand. A must have for a messy spitter upper like Camden. They do a pretty darn good spit shine on counters and coffee tables too.

Duncan Hines chocolate chunk brownies- chocolate, chunks, warm, ooey-gooey, mmm. Another must have for a harried mom of 5. As a matter of fact the mere consumption of too many of these bad boys and I will never be a mother of 6. Brownies as birth control, who knew?

Johnson and Johnson cucumber melon scented baby bath, lotion, and powder- yummy smelling for this baby of mine and me. Said powder also does a darn good job of taming the greasies. Since I rarely have time to wash and dry my hair anymore. Camden is afraid of the blow drier now anyways...

Elsie and Daisy (my boobies)- they enabled my baby to add 10 pounds to his birthweight by 6 months of age as well as provide a nice warm pillow for him to sleep on. Amen.

My iPhone- I just love it so. I have my scriptures, every church hymn, every church manual, and some conference talks on there. In addition to maps that know I'm standing in my kitchen, to all sorts of fun games and nifty apps. So stinkin' fun and worth every penny. I <3 you iPhone.

My sense of humor- I am just glad I can laugh at myself and occasionally at others. There are days when a sense of humor is all I got against this wacky life of mine. I'm not really sure where I got it from but I love it! It makes me smile when people tell me I crack them up :)

Gerber puffs in assorted flavors- these little flavored rice puffball thingys have enabled me to grocery shop, attend church classes, and blog. Camden loves them. Thank You Gerber!

earbuds- this goes without saying if you are a mom of teenagers. They can't hear me nag or the baby cry. As long as I can get their attention by throwing a rubber flip flop or couch cushion at them, we're good.

concealer- any brand will do, as long as it's one shade lighter than the dark circles I have been sporting since 1990. Lately a dash of baby powder to my scalp, chapstick on my pout, and a smidge of concealer and look out world! However, I may need to step up my game. Today Chloe told me she was embarrassed to be seen with me since I was wearing no makeup and my hair was flippy. She said I looked like a soccer mom... As if!?

French vanilla yogurt with vanilla almond granola mixed in- yummy, crunchy, and sorta healthy. Right? Right? Ok, go easy on the granola and you should be ok...

So there you have it, my current can't live withouts. Feel free to add more of your can't live withouts under comments. I can always use a new product to obsess over.

Poop!

2010-04-23T18:52:00.005-05:00

I am a little bit OCD about certain things, one of those being my kids and their personal hygiene. I can't force them to bathe... Ok, I can. But, if they want to smell bad, it's not my problem. Now, Camden has no choice. I bathe him every single day, sometimes twice a day. He seems to smell fresh for 5 minutes each day and then the rest of the day it's baby food or spit up smell, yuck! I have a ritual every time I bathe him too. After I have soaped him up from head to toe (toenails and fingernails with a nail brush too) I rinse him, dry him, Q-tip his ears and nose, powder his bum and then I rub him down with lotion. I did this with all the kids until they were about 18 months. Then, they become such a handful I do what I can to de-funkify them. When they are around 3 or 4 they kinda do their own thing with me or Jon supervising. At 5 they decide they want to shower. And, I know for a fact that they don't use as much soap or shampoo as I would like them to nor do they get all the cracks and crevices like I would want them to either. Which brings me to the point of this post. Today, as I was bathing Camden to go on a lunch date with me and my friends I had a flashback of one such incident when Hayden was 6 or so. We had his yearly checkup one morning and the night before I had him shower. I laid out clean clothes and undies- the whole shebang. I Q-tipped his ears and made sure he was nice and shiny before his doctor appointment. The next morning we were rushing around to get ready and it never occurred to me to do a hygiene inspection. We barely made it on time and before you knew it they called us in for our turn with the cute little Asian female doctor. We got in the room and the doctor was asking me about Hayden's progress with school, his eating habits, and his poopy habits- like did he ever get constipated etc. I of course said no, never. Hayden is my "like clockwork every single day after school go poop kid". She proceeds to do his physical exam and lastly goes to check "his business" and to my horror right there in his Power Ranger underwear was a 3D skid mark... I'm not sure but I think after I died of embarrassment I called my insurance company and requested a PCP change. I mean really? Can't kids feel those in their pants? And, I may be wrong here but it seems to be a trend with little boys. Man was I ever mortified... I'm not really sure why that memory jumped in my head today but it did. I also hope Hayden never decides to read my blog and if he does I hope he keeps his sense of humor intact! And, that goes down in my history of unforgettable you wish they'd never happened moments as a mother.

18 tidbits about my 18 year old

2010-04-22T01:55:00.006-05:00

In honor of Chandler's 18th birthday, I have compiled a list of 18 things I want to always remember about him and his childhood. These are just but a few of the funny, neat or just plain silly things he has done over the years. Like the time he sneezed on a brand newborn Hunter or when I caught him drinking his prescription bubble gum flavored antibiotic with a crazy straw as if it were no big deal... I sure hope the internet stays put, since I don't wanna forget all this. I am getting old, ya know!?

1. The first morning I woke up at home with my new baby Chandler, I couldn't find him. He was under the covers next to my feet. Not sure how he got down there. We had been nursing and sleeping, or so I thought... I have since perfected the art of co-sleeping, either with my hubby or my kiddos.

2. I was gonna name him Chandler Mackensie- regardless of gender. I picked his first name from a magazine article about a guitar player named Chandler who went by Chan. This same guitar player is now in the band Blues Traveler. I later saw the name in a book, The Prince of Tides. This time it was a little girl named Chandler and I knew then that my baby would be named Chandler.

3. Chandler has always been a big boy. I would often get scolded by nosy people for giving him binkies and bottles when he was so big. People thought he was closer to 4 when he was really only 2. He weighed 50 pounds when he was 2!

4. His first word was BEAST, he was about 10 months old. At the time his favorite movie was Beauty and the Beast. He used to take his binky out, say BEAST and then stick it back in.

5. Barney the big purple dinosaur was hugely popular when Chandler was little. He started out crawling like a baboon with his butt in the air and when he finally learned to walk, he would walk like Barney. Or in other words- stomp around like a dinosaur.

6. Chandler has always been a master at making messes. He was always getting into trouble with ooey gooey substances. Once, he tried to cram oatmeal in the VCR. He also cracked eggs on the TV, which made a nice little scramble on the wood grain. Other favorites- smearing butter on the kitchen floor and more than once emptying an entire container of baby powder. So not fun to clean.

7. He used to love to walk with me and his aunts to our grandma's house. Once there he would put on her slippers and get into her chair where he would feast on peanuts and homemade chocolate chip cookies. This snack would be accompanied by a Diet Coke, with a straw. When she passed away, he asked for her slippers- and he got them.

8. Chan is my kiddo of quirky Halloween costumes. A few of my favorites: Hamburglar and one year he was a Rastafarian, complete with dreads and dark brown skin. I am not sure what I mixed together to make him "black" but it was pretty dang cute.

9. Chandler is super duper crazy smart. He has taken the gifted talented test at school EVERY year since 2nd grade and every year he fails on purpose. He doesn't want to be grouped with the gifted kids and he most certainly doesn't want to have to do more homework than absolutely necessary.

10. He has been in 4 spelling bees, from 2nd to 6th grades. He won 3 of them at the school level and then immediately bombed at the district level. Two words that I remember him messing up on- neighborhood and fauna. Weird what we remember as moms huh?

11. Chandler was afraid of big in ground swimming pools for years and years and it wasn't until after he was 10 or so that he would leave the steps or side of the pool even though he towered above the top of the water. Funny thing is, now he spends more time in our pool than any of us.

12. He LOVES ketchup! More than any other edible substance on Earth. Like, it's a freakin' tragedy if we are out of ketchup. I gifted him with a basket of 18 different varieties for his birthday. He'll eat it on everything from burgers to egg rolls to pizza.

13. He once broke my sister Kelli's cat's pelvis by closing it in a drawer. It only cost $200 bucks to stick a balloon up the cat's butt to fix it....

14. He used to love to color so much. He had a special name for the crayons and to this day I can't figure out the connection. He called them gobies. So cute!

15. He has good taste in friends! He has about 6 close friends who are REDHEADS! It's gotta have something to do with his mom being a redhead. Ok, maybe they're drawn to his red beard. I am hoping for redheaded grandchildren!

16. One of his favorite things to do with his grandpa was "ghost hunting". My dad would drive him around at night to all the areas in town that had long winding roads or little to no street lights and they would "hunt for ghosts".

17. He has not acclimated to driving as well as he would like to. Case in point- he recently drove my van to pick Hunter up from a friend's house and he hit a brick mailbox with my bumper. He used black nail polish, black craft paint and an old pair of boxer shorts to repair the damage. He was genuinely shocked when we figured it out.

18. He gets panicky when he's sick or super sun burnt. His one cure all-to walk around buck naked. That crazy kid has surprised more than one person walking around in the buff....

And one to grow on- He told us today that he wants to be an astronaut. This child of mine who vomited when he got a hair on his toothbrush, and when he smelled a bad fart, and when he saw the dog eat a poopy diaper. This same kid who is not too thrilled with roller coasters wants to be an ASTRONAUT?!

Oh brother....

On my Chan-Man

2010-04-22T00:16:00.012-05:00

I have been wanting to sit down and blog about Chandler for quite some time, but haven't really had a ton of time to devote to the kind of post I wanted to do. I am determined to get this finished before dawn... Way back in March, Chandler celebrated his 18th birthday. Which, is a huge milestone for so many reasons: he is legally considered an adult now, he can vote, he's old enough to work at Target (score), etc etc. But, the biggest milestone for me personally was that I never imagined I could raise a kid, let alone get one to adulthood. And yes, I know he is barely an adult.

I am not sure how many of you guys that read this know that Chandler has a different father, whom he has never met and that I met his step-dad Jon (who is HIS DAD, regardless of genetics) when he was almost 3. Yes, I was a "single" mom although I did live with my sisters and my parents. I was responsible for his care as much as I physically, emotionally, and financially could- whenever I could. I mainly relied on backup from my sisters because I didn't want my parents to think I couldn't handle a kid, my kid. You see, I had only been 17 for a few short months whenever I got pregnant. I was a statistic- an unwed, pregnant teenager. I was also nearly 16 weeks along before I even found out I was expecting. I strongly suspected it, but was in massive denial and didn't really know where or whom to turn to. It wasn't until I finished up a session at Summer school that I had a few of my friends drive me to a free clinic in Dallas. I pretty much knew I was pregnant, I just needed confirmation. As if the sore breasts, nausea, and terrible exhaustion weren't a big enough clue. So silly, but I remember giving a fake name in case the nurse at the clinic decided to tattle on me. Once I found out I kept it between me, my sisters, and my friends who took me to the clinic. I had always known that I wasn't meant to be your typical young adult, I had felt it since I was a little girl. I just didn't know what my future held- but I was about to find out, quick! I managed to keep my secret for a few weeks and it wasn't until a huge fight with my mom did the cat jump out of the bag. I was terrified of what my dad would say/think. Instead, I think for the first time in several years a light seemed to shine on our family. Little did I know what joy, hope, and happiness he would bring to all of us. Which is what brings me to this post- Chandler's 18th birthday is such a huge milestone because he came into this world 2 weeks after I turned 18. I could go on and on about my life thus far with the Chanster, but I won't. Simply put, yes there were and will continue to be hard days. But, for every hard moment there have been a thousand more awesome ones. I will say that I was headed down the wrong path, doing all kinds of foolish crap and I 100% believe that Chandler saved my life and came into this world when I and my family needed it most. He is such a cool, awesome, smart, funny, quirky kid and I am alot proud and truly honored that he picked me to be his mommy.

gettin' his hair did

me (19) and Chan (1)

Senior night at his school (back in October)

me and Chan and Cam on his 18th birthday (sorta blurry)

Currently....

2010-04-18T19:12:00.002-05:00

I smell like Gerber vegetable beef dinner, spit up, and vanilla lotion

I have one boob supported by my bra and the other one is free-fallin'

Camden is playing with a pair of sunglasses, a calculator, and a trial size deodorant

I am playing 8 games of Words with Friends and I am losing most of them- one on purpose

I have 2 quarters waiting to be disinfected on my kitchen sink. Chloe put them in Cam's diaper as a joke and he of course pooped...

I'm trying to make myself clean the garbage off the back porch. I caught a real life coyote eating through a bag of trash last night...

I am super bummed that I missed church today :( Camden screamed his head off from 12 to 4 and it was AWFUL. I was way too exhausted to even get out of bed til after 11- dang it...

I'm crossing my fingers that Jon finishes his "sabbatical" soon, because I need a break

I'm taking being the mom of a tween girl moment by moment

I'm SO THANKFUL that my boys are soooo laid back, whew

My floors are so dirty, I'm truly embarrassed

I'm in the middle of planning Chan's graduation hoopla and festivities. Darn it, that kid CANNOT be a Senior already!

I'm kinda sorta thinking Cam might want a sibling/baby brother/playmate ;)

I'm about to go bang my head on the ground for making the above statement

Totally OK and Not So Fast...

2010-04-15T11:00:00.003-05:00

Hey, it's totally ok to:

nurse your baby after feeding him/her baby food. Contrary to popular belief, sweet potatoes and peas ARE good for your areolas!

walk around with a booger on your cheek. You can always blame it on that sweet hug one of your children just gave you and not on the fact that you just sneezed into your elbow. What? You WERE trying to avoid spraying one million snot droplets into the already contaminated air at Walmart.

share a spoon with AND eat after your baby but not your school age children. He suckles at your breast and the memory of his descent from the birth canal is still fresh in your mind, while those older children of yours are entering puberty and they attend public school. Gross!

let your toddler chew on your daily wear flip flops but have a mini heart attack if he/she even thinks about crawling on the floor at the pediatrician's office. The germs on your shoe are from your house (mostly) while the doctor's office floor is germ soup...

dress your kiddos to the nines while you look like something the cat wouldn't even touch with a 10 foot pole let alone drag in.

go 5 days without washing your hair. I did hear the "wet look" might make a comeback, maybe...

resurrect your day old makeup (that you slept in) with a little bit of concealer and fresh makeup. Work it girl!

stick yesterday's clothes in the dryer with a Bounce dryer sheet AFTER you spiff them up with a wet rag first. After all you did look sorta cute and there just might be a dried booger on the sleeve of your shirt.

give your baby an unplugged small electronic to play with while you try to blog... I may or may not have done this. Ok, it was a clock and it was unplugged!

wash 17 loads of laundry in one week but not fold a single sock

Not so fast:

Mom jeans aren't hot- ever! I don't care what InStyle magazine says. They're just goofy and yes they do make you look fat!

If your bra strap is riding up between your shoulder blades it's too small! You either need a new bra or a breast reduction. Hint- bras are cheaper, easier on the eyes and alot less painful!

Never go to bed without brushing your teeth. Trust me. Yes, it has happened to me recently and it was after consuming garlic and cheese. All I have to say is- cat turd breath.

I don't care what you may think- NO ONE'S grass is greener. Please please please take this to heart. I have to tell myself this often. It may seem like your problems are worse than anyone on Earth, but they're not. Everyone has issues, problems, and concerns. They're either mental or much better at hiding crap than you.

Don't rough-house with a freshly bathed or fed baby. He/she will projectile vomit all over you and his/her freshly bathed self. This has happened to me no less than ten times a day the last 7 months and I STILL haven't learned my lesson.

Don't put off knowing what you are going to wear, how long it will take you to get ready and possible traffic jams. You will be late, you always are. Oh wait. That's what I've been meaning to write on my bathroom mirror- sorry :p

And, there you have it. A small sampling of the do's and don'ts of Mommyhood according to Ashley!

I've lost that blogging feeling...

2010-04-14T16:33:00.007-05:00

I really miss my blog so so much. It bums me out that I no longer have time for it. And, I've tried- I really have. I even gloated in my last post that I was gonna get back into blogging full force... It seems since then that life got even more hectic, if that's even possible. I've also gotten out of the habit. Plus, I honestly feel as if I have nothing good or funny or interesting to say, dangit. I mean, my older kids are to the point where they are gone with friends or texting or yelling at me so there's no blog material there. Hayden still says some dang funny crap and does cute stuff but when you're out of the habit of blogging it just gets tucked into your memory instead of on the computer. I'm not gonna say I'm taking a break- wouldn't wanna cause anyone to roll their eyes at me! But, I will say that I would really like to pick it back up again I just don't know if I'll be able to. Honestly, my hats off to those of you who find time to update and make me smile! Each morning I hit the floor running and work away at laundry and little bits of exercise and chores. Plus, I spend a ton of time playing and cuddling with Camden. We try and venture out to the park or shopping or lunch with friends a few times a week. But really my days are jam packed and there are only so many hours in a day. However, in the Spirit of Ashley I am gonna do A LIST!

Reasons Why I Never Blog Anymore

1) I do at least 3 loads of laundry a day which takes a ton of time and sucks royally...

2) My entire family is sharing one computer (6 people x 1 computer = no blogging)

3) I have a 7 month old baby who is already pulling up, crawling, and generally being a big handful!

4) I have been preparing a big home cooked meal every night and it takes me at least 2 hours between the baby and preparation not to mention cleanup and whatnot. Ugh! Remind me why family dinner is important again?!

5) I am cheating on my blog with Facebook. It's express blogging! Much faster and easier and like 10 times the comments :)

6) I've been spending a little bit of time exercising, which is much better for my butt than the desk chair.

7) I am having a love affair with my iPhone and this nifty game called Words with Friends. It's superb!

8) I've lost the knack! I 100% think I am way too boring for blogging words... Really, I don't know what to blog about anymore

9) I let myself get out of the habit, unfortunately.

10) If I'm gonna take time to do something for myself it's not gonna be on the computer. I'm gonna read a book or get a pedicure or something.

11) Having a much desired baby come into an already hectic, nutty, household has kicked my butt- but good! I have said that before but I don't think anyone realizes unless you have a kid who is crying, nursing, getting into crap or whining to be held. Plus, his 30 minute naps unless he's on his mom's tittay are also a factor. If I ever get pregnant again... so help me Lord.

12) My stomach problems. I finally had an ultrasound today and hope it shows what's wrong. If not I have to go in for an endoscopy. There are days when I have a million things planned but if my tummy is acting up I barely leave the couch or get to eat. Case in point- I recently lost 7 pounds in 5 days.

I think that pretty much sums it up. I reallyreallyreally love my blog and I love to read all of my friend's blogs but there just aren't enough hours in the day. Keep checking mine and I'll keep checking yours ;) I may just surprise you one day and update this bad boy. I love all of y'all to bits and I am so so grateful for the friendships, memories, and support that have been born since I started blogging. Muah!

a recent "project"- one current pic of each kiddo (wait, how did I have time to do that??)

Miss Me, Miss Me...

2010-04-05T09:26:00.005-05:00

now you gotta kiss something??
Anyway- I bet you are as shocked as I am that I am actually blogging... I really do miss it and updating is always in the back of my mind, but I am just so busy all the time. However, now that Camden is trying to grow up on me and be alot more independent I might actually have time to blog! Sounds crazy I know, but in the last 10 days he has finally developed a taste for baby food and learned to sit up, crawl, and pull up! Yes, I realize he will be into everything but he won't be overly clingy and wanting to nurse every hour and be held constantly. I have tried for months to figure out why he constantly spits up and is fussy between his every hour nursing sessions (in addition to several other symptoms) and I finally think I know what it is! Read here. Basically I am making too much of the sugary first milk and not enough of the fatty hind milk (that satisfies him longer) which means he is hungry and gassy and has every other symptom listed except for frequent diaper rashes. It has been very frustrating simply because not only was I not used to a baby in the house but none of my other kiddos were this clingy and fussy. But, now that he is relying on three mini meals of baby food a day and can move all around the house (so far he's staying in the living room) he is much less cranky and A TON of fun! Which for me means- I can have my life back! If only for a little while. Until he's trying to dive off the couch or open the cabinets for pots to bang on or maybe go fishing in the toilet. He is a momma's boy though which drives Jon nuts so when I do get to take a nice looong bath or get on the computer, it's never for very long.... but we'll get there- I think! I can't promise I'll post daily but I am gonna try.

Cam is 6 months old already?!

2010-03-15T14:25:00.005-05:00

My little Camden turned 6 months old on the 10th, craziness! In some ways it seems like he's been here forever and in other ways, I feel like I'm reliving the first month all over again... He has definitely been a challenging baby, and I was definitely not used to having a baby in the house. He seems to be a snacker when he nurses and wants to nurse for 15 minutes every hour, plus he wants to nurse to sleep for naps and at night. So, I often wonder why I bother wearing a top or bra... Really I should go lounge on a topless beach somewhere with a cool drink and let him snack away. I guess I was more used to my freedom than I realized! He loves to be read to or be played with, tickled, cooed at, rocked etc. and he loves his jumperoo and swing, but he can only last solo for 15 minutes or less. So, between the near constant nursing and his less than stellar attention span, I am constantly at his beck and call! Don't you dare call him spoiled....
And, now for the fun stuff! He has almost mastered getting into a sitting position alone, once he's there he can stay that way unassisted for a good long while. He has been rocking on all fours for over a month and does these spastic jerky crawling motions. He can drag himself forward a bit and has mastered backwards scooting. He is blowing bubbles, still cooing, giggling, and has just started the cutest babbling sounds. He likes water from a cup and finally loves baby cereal. His other faves are pureed or refried beans, mashed potatoes, avocado, yogurt, and mashed banana, or in other words- big people food. I am fixing to stop at nothing to get him to eat baby food. I want him used to all the flavors as opposed to him wanting big people food all the time! There are only so many things I can mash up that he won't gag on and I'm too busy to make homemade baby food! He still sleeps with us, which is kicking my butt because he wants to nurse alot or snuggle up to my boob (his pillow) and I am tired all the time because of that...
He is absolutely in LOVE with the big kids and gets very excited, giggly, and smiley when they come home from school. They are pretty smitten with him too. However, they hate when he cries in the car (which he loathes) and when he's fussy when they are ready for bed. They also DO NOT like when he spits up on them and so far Jon and I are the only ones that will change a poopy diaper. Which at this moment is still every other day and yellow- they are gonna die when it's brown and super stinky...
Anyway- here's to the next 6 months! May they be just as fun, not as stressful, and full of fun memories!
P.S. I may add a few pics later- he's being fussy right now... big shocker! This is one of many reasons I never get to blog anymore!!

Liar Liar

2010-03-03T13:52:00.003-06:00

Ok, so I am supposed to be keeping up with my blog... and I haven't! I have reasons though. Of course I have reasons! Chandler had surgery, again. He had ACL/MCL reconstruction on his knee. Basically they take a piece of tendon from his knee and repair or make new ligaments with it. It's a pretty intense surgery and he has been home with me for a week. He has recovered nicely up to this point but has needed ice bags, medicine, food, and drink constantly so between nursing Camden and tending to Chandler I have barely had time to breathe. Plus, not to mention Cam has had a nasty eye infection and Hayden has a sinus infection. So, between the three boys I have kept Walgreens in business this week. They have had 7 RX's filled in the last week! I won't even tell you the hours I spent in Doctor's waiting rooms...
Then, it was mine and Jon's birthday on Sunday. Big whoop! I turned a big number and Jon turned an even bigger number- 40. And, because I am so not on my game, we did a whole lotta nothin'! Jon chose to spend his day at the track and I went to church. We met up for Chili's, we let the kids choose and they loooove Chili's. Honestly I like to eat there, but my friend Lois took me there for my birthday lunch (and gave me an awesome bracelet and necklace) on Friday and I guess I thought Jon and I would be lucky enough to score a sitter and have a super nice birthday evening but it wasn't meant to be. I feel bad because I really wanted to throw Jon an awesome Over the Hill party but the surgeon insisted Chandler needed surgery asap and that took first priority. I promise eventually I will make it up to him.... somehow!
And then, one of my mom's closest friends who I thought the world of passed away on Friday and the funeral was yesterday. So sad :( Her passing away really bothered me because not only am I growing older but the people who I admired as a child and spent time with that were adults then are now reaching their golden years and with that comes sickness and death. One of the parts of being an adult I do not like a bit.
So, those are my reasons. I am bound and determined to keep my blog going, it's just hard! Bear with me. I hope to get out and about more with the kiddos and hopefully have lots of fun and take lots of pics. Crossing my fingers...

On that depression thing...

2010-02-25T16:59:00.006-06:00

*this is long, but please read it all. And, just so you know I could have taken a shower but I decided to blog instead!*

Ok, so I know I said I needed to gather my thoughts before I posted, but I never did. I'm just gonna start typing and hope I don't sound like an idiot. After each of my babies was born I got a little bit blue. It starts as I drive away from the hospital. And, I can only guess it's because the pregnancy is over and all of the attention that was focused on me is now focused on a wrinkly smelly screaming little creature that I am head over heels in love with. Alot of it is exhaustion too. After a week or so I always think I'm in a routine and I have dodged the postpartum depression bullet. But, it rears it's ugly head and the days and nights are a blur and there are lots of tears. By month 3 I am good as new. However, this time it started the minute I found out I was pregnant and got progressively worse as I neared my due date. I knew the minute I found out that I would never be pregnant again and that finality was weighing on me. Because, I love me some babies but I am no Michelle Duggar and I am definitely not Octomom, maybe I'm somewhere in between? Anyway what I am trying to say is, babies are like a drug so to speak. They're intoxicating and soft and amazing and all these wonderful things that outweigh the crying and the poopy diapers and sleepless nights, but you can only have so many. They turn into people, with issues and drama, and stress and I want to be the best mom I can and my plate is full!
Anyways- I was a teeny bit excited and a whole lot scared shi*less. I had never really gotten over being blue when Hayden went off to kindergarten. Plus, I was so nearing freedom with Chan fixing to turn 18 and Hayden able to wipe his own butt and cook his own Kid Cuisines. I was TERRIFIED to have a baby. And, while I admit it was fun to do the whole Surprise! I'm pregnant announcement and belly shots, and buying all new baby goodies and whatnot- deep down I knew I was in for it. Thankfully, I stayed busy with my kids and the pregnancy progressed not too fast, not too slow. Let me stop here and say that during my pregnancy I worked really hard to keep up the facade that I was FINE and EXCITED even though I was sweating nails, often. I was also absolutely THRILLED to have another child, but the dark cloud of postpartum depression constantly loomed over everything.
Fast forward to labor and delivery. The whole time I was in labor I was praying silently in my head that I would dodge the blues. But, guess what? The second they whisked him off to the nursery for his group B strep tests (I was positive, remember?) I almost lost it. Even watching him get his bath an hour later I was standing at the nursery window watching the nurse suds him up and I was trembling and sweating. I really wanted to turn back time at that point. I was in LOVE but I was confused... The first few days home were filled with diaper changes, nursing, naps and endless visitors. I kept waiting for things to feel "normal" again. And, here I am almost 6 months later and guess what? I am a little better than I was that very first day, but not by much. Each day presents different challenges. In the very beginning I would get so frustrated and overwhelmed when Cam would cry. Seeing the laundry and dishes pile up would make me cry even more and my chest ache. Just the day to day of a sorta big family was kicking my butt and stressing me out, BAD! I can't tell you how many times I told Jon that I couldn't do it anymore and if things didn't change I was taking the baby and leaving. What frustrates me most is how I kept getting mad about things like my desk being full of mail or the fact that we had clean but not folded laundry. How silly of me! I have 5 beautiful children and am blessed beyond measure and I am fussing over laundry and unopened mail! But then, there were those same big kids and their fighting and endless stream of activities and school projects. Then, it seemed as if we would ALWAYS need groceries or diapers or milk or something. I'm not even touching on the "I'm a fat, ugly, terrible mom, loser." Or the "I suck at everything, no one loves me, I'm a worthless piece of crap" feelings that were always laughing at me from afar. To top it all off there were days when I felt like WonderWoman. Days when no one fought, homework was done, I cooked a decent dinner and had a chance to shower. I was and am still on a roller coaster ride of emotions. It is not fun. I am trying to feel better though and little things like not sleeping too much, a good long bath, a phone call with a good friend or a much needed scripture verse work wonders. I basically try many many little things each and every day to feel happy and "normal". I hope and pray each day that as soon as I finish nursing for good that my hormones will level out even more and I will feel 100%. I am absolutely GIDDY and BLESSED and in LOVE with my family although Jon and I have seen better days, but I am trying. I am oh so thankful for wise women who have been there both as a shoulder or an ear or those that have experienced the exact same things I am feeling now. I have complete faith in my Heavenly Father that I will get better and this experience is but a blip on my eternal radar and I can only hope that I am learning from this experience each day that passes. For sure makeup and a shower work wonders for me, and simply opening the blinds to let the sun shine in. So, that's it. I am sure I have left out so much, but I hope that at least one person can read this and relate or learn from my experience and if I can help one person in my shoes to smile or feel better then I have accomplished something today. Thanks for reading :)

She's Baaaack.... (she thinks)

2010-02-19T21:14:00.005-06:00

Ok, so I guess I'm gonna try and get back to this blog thing. This first post back will be an update so to speak. Since I last blogged, the following things have occurred:

Hunter turned 14. We had pizza, cake, and a few friends over. A good time was had by all. Yes, I have pics. No, I'm not posting them now. Maybe later.

My parents celebrated their 50th anniversary. A few of us kiddos threw them a small dinner party to celebrate. We had yummy Mexican food and a delightfully tacky gold and creme cake. A great slideshow with awesome music and good conversation. Again, I took some pics before my camera started acting stoopid and I may or may not post some.

Camden came down with RSV! My first official experience with it. Thankfully it was a mild case and he only needed breathing treatments for a week. Whew! He was pretty fussy and miserable but we made it!

I have had SEVERAL people mad at me for various DUMB reasons. They run the gamut from I am a stay home mom and that's not fair to those that have to work, to who I'm friends with- both on Facebook and in person, to the fact that I am what I am and apparently there are things about me that are super duper annoying, who knew? Honestly, I don't give a crap. I'm sorry, but I'm never gonna be sorry. Accept me or reject me just please quit whining.

I joined a gym. That's right, a gym. I have been wearing knit stretchy fabrics and oversized tops for a year and I am sick of it. It's time to lose the maternity garb and get moving again. I NEED to get this weight off. Plus, I am hoping to release some feel good endorphins. We'll see. I doubt I will ever be thin. Scratch that, I KNOW I'll never be thin. But, a girl's gotta try!

Camden grew up a whole lot! He is currently: rocking on all fours, doing full complete turns when he's on his belly by scooting in a circle, rolling 2 or 3 feet at a time, and my favorite- constantly smiling and giggling. I love it! He is soo sweet! However, he still loathes baby food except plain rice cereal. I confess I have given him a few bites of avocado, refried beans and some vanilla yogurt, all of which he loved! He better not be a picky eater like Hayden or I'm done for!

We got a buttload of snow, try not to get a visual ;). But, unless you live under a rock you know that D/FW got record snowfall last week. It was absolutely gorgeous. I could get used to more frequent snow, maybe. The kids had a blast and it was really neat to look out and see bright white pretty snow. The after effect was pretty ugly. Dying snowmen, mountains of dirty wet clothes and mud.

Chandler went to his orthopedic surgeon and will be having an ACL/MCL reconstruction next week. They call his type of injury the "Unhappy Triad". Basically they take a piece of tendon from his knee and rebuild his ACL and his MCL. Good times. I hope he recovers as easily as Jon did when he had it done back in '02 minus the vomiting and fainting spells. Lucky me- I was nursing a 6 month old baby back then and I will be doing the same thing now. Makes changing ice packs, wrapping body parts so they don't get wet in the shower and fetching food SO MUCH FUN...

Hunter has a new girlfriend! Her name is Ashley. She thinks I'm sweet and cute and she loves my red hair. I like her ALOT! He is also so dang good with Camden, it's crazy. He frequently tells me how much he loves Cam and how cool he is, it's really sweet.

Hayden is being tested for gifted in the Spring. This didn't come from left field, this came from the parking lot at the baseball stadium! He is a smart boy but I always thought his atleticism and motor skills (learning to ride a bike by himself at age 3) were his strong suits- not school. We shall see, his teacher seems to think he might qualify for the gifted program.

Chloe hit preteen harder than I thought was ever possible. She has had her toe into tween for awhile, but wowza things have been u-g-l-y lately. Tantrums, insults, door slamming, makeup swiping from mommy to name a few. And, the icing on the cake? She removed me as her friend on Facebook because she didn't like a comment I made on her status. Ouch...

And, last but certainly not least. I have postpartum depression and it sucks. I am not gonna go into detail now. I am gonna blog about it this weekend. No holds barred. I'm gonna spill my guts. I'm gonna rant and rave and more than likely there will be tears shed, both by me and maybe some of y'all. I really need to gather my thoughts about what to say and stuff. Just please, pray for me. I really want to feel better.

The end... for now.

Hiatus

2010-01-28T12:56:00.004-06:00

Ok, so I'm taking a "break" from blogging. And, before you groan and roll your eyes let me explain. Before I had Camden I was in a funk and would waste countless hours on the computer. In that time I developed friendships that I truly treasure now and would be lost without. But, I also developed a bad habit of not managing my time and ignoring more important things. It wasn't unusual for me to check my email 20 times a day or refresh my blog to see if someone commented over and over... and then it was Facebook. Oh my goodness, Facebook! I love it! I love the rekindled friendships and the new connections. I won't mention blog surfing and online shopping and etc etc... But now, I simply cannot keep up. With my kids, my chores, cooking, homework, you name it. I have been trying to keep up my "online life" but it's causing me to suffer in ways I never imagined- like when I got a moment I would read blogs or Facebook instead of showering and when I was ready to bathe, Camden would have a screaming gassy fit and guess what? No shower that day! Or, I would stay up late and browse online and not go to bed with my hubby and before you knew it, it was 2am and my kids needed to be up at 6. I still try and read every one's blogs and I do get on Facebook but it's usually a quick check on my iPhone, so I don't keep my butt glued to the office chair (which is getting flat in the seat area, hmmm). I love my blog and I love that y'all read and love it. But, I HAVE to start prioritizing. I am just waaaay too busy to waste time on the computer. This is in no way an insult to those of you who love to blog and still have time for it, keep it up. It makes the rare 10 minutes a day I do get online (usually to add lunch money to the kid's school accounts or check the weather) all the more enjoyable. I will TRY and blog here and there, but it's no longer #1 or even #8 on my priority list. Keep me on a reader, check here and there. I still have a list of things to write about and pics to post, someday.... I LOVE YOU GUYS! And, I hope that y'all still want updates on me and the kiddos, so at the very least I will try and keep y'all updated on the family.

Not so fast....

2010-01-19T13:53:00.003-06:00

Yeah, so note to self: no more pep talks! I think I jinxed myself something AWFUL after my last post... Yesterday was terrible, and that's a major understatement! I'm having that "I have to be Superwoman" thing going on. I get frustrated and overwhelmed way too easy. And while I did feel like a Rockstar when I wrote my last post, I am now back down on Earth. I have got to learn to RELAX! Any tips? I know there are good days and bad days, and I know it will get better and eventually I will have an empty nest. However, what the hell am I supposed to do in the meantime?

Just Because

2010-01-16T15:34:00.002-06:00

Ya know, I really wish I was always positive, but I'm not. I really wish I didn't compare myself to others, but I do. I really wish I didn't think the grass was greener on the other side, but I sometimes do. I get irritated at myself for being that way. It's so dumb! Call me an idiot, call me a brat, call me blind- whatever you want. I admit that I am dense, among other things. Anyway- the reason for this post is to pump me up really. I have a wonderful family and am so blessed but have found myself overwhelmed and frumpy and cranky among other things. But today I sat on the computer and looked at a bunch of old posts (sorry for the lack of new content) and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I am funny! I am smart! I am sorta cute and sometimes I look pretty! My house isn't as bad as I think it is. My family is cool, and nutty, and unique and MINE! I always think we don't do enough fun or memorable stuff, that we don't have a cool family like EVERY one else...I certainly don't document enough memories of the things we manage to do. And, I finally realized how silly I am! Shame on me... I have been re-reading my old posts and I am a swell person and a good wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, etc. and we DO have a cool family and I have a pretty amazing life. No, I don't get to travel to neat places, I can't take good pics to save my life, I am chunky, my family is wacky and I could go on and name my "flaws" forever and a day but I'm not gonna. I'm just gonna sit here and enjoy my family today and every day. Now, you go back and read some of my old old posts and I am gonna go spank myself.

First Food!

2010-01-13T08:09:00.008-06:00

Cam had his first taste of cereal on Monday. And, he hated it! He gagged far worse than any of the other kids ever did. I thinned it to almost pure formula (what? I am all out of pumped breastmilk...) with a tiny bit of cereal and it was still too thick for him. He did look cute in his french fry bib and high chair though! I am thinking he'll survive until we try again, especially since at his doctor appointment yesterday he weighed in at 15.4 pounds and 26.5 inches long! All of the many many hours spent nursing are paying off. She was very pleased with his growth given the fact that he spits up so much. He is so sweet and I am so in love with him. He is super close to rolling over (finally) from back to front and giggles all the time. His favorite thing to do now is try and sit up when I am changing his diaper or he is in his tub or swing. I can't believe he is already 4 months old, time sure does fly! Anyway- here are some pics of the momentous occasion. Enjoy!

blessing the food

watching mommy mix his cereal

3...2...1

GAG, so blurry but sooo funny!

yuck, ick, blech!

hey! This isn't what I'm used to eating...

no more mommy!!

hating being wiped up almost as bad as eating cereal

Football Party!

2010-01-11T01:24:00.009-06:00

Friday night was Chan's last ever football banquet. It's a big deal for Senior moms because you get to decorate your own table, or half a table in our case. You can have a full table if you pay $25 per chair. Multiply that by 10 people plus money for decorations and it gets expensive! Little did we know the folks we were sharing a table with were no shows... Anyway, I have been looking forward to this for years. Little did I know when the time came that I would have a clingy 4 month old who could have cared less about my need to craft! However after working off and on for two days I managed to do a decent table display. Plus, I got to go on a date with Jon, Chan, and Hunter. Thanks so much to Erin and Vince for watching the other three kiddos while we "partied". Anyway- here are some pics of the table and a very few of us.

World Class Teenage Drama Queen

2010-01-09T16:57:00.004-06:00

This:

Has turned in to this:

and I am SCARED! Hold me....

Behind the Scenes

2010-01-09T01:08:00.005-06:00

I have to THANK my friend Erica for taking such great great pictures of our family for our Christmas cards. At first, she sent me only the best ones but Jon wanted to get all of them, so I begged her for the not so great ones, mainly for laughs. And, boy they didn't disappoint. Erica is just learning photography and wanted some practice with a bigger group and I am broke so I paid her in cookies. The kids did as well as could be expected but were still giant turds much of the time. And, I have proof! Take a look at these bad boys. My kids are boogers but man they are funny and I wouldn't trade any of them and their drama/antics/monkey business/crap for the world!

I is sorry...

2010-01-09T01:02:00.003-06:00

I is sorry for not being a better blogger and most importantly a better blog reader and commenter. I will try to do gooder on this, forgive me.
Sincerely,
Ashley

Hello?

2010-01-05T16:23:00.000-06:00

Is there anybody out there? Does anyone still read this??

Handbook for 2010

2010-01-04T18:27:00.003-06:00

My sweet sister in law Sarah sent this to Jon who then forwarded it to me. Sounds like a good plan to me!

Health:
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants...
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy.
5. Make time to pray.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2009.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minute walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:
11. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time w/ people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
32. Do the right thing!
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. God heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, be thankful for it.
39. Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Last but not the least:
40. Please share this with everyone you care about, I just did.

Christmas 2009

2009-12-29T23:32:00.015-06:00

Ok, so Christmas 2009 was.... interesting. I got some pics but not near enough. Mainly of me, Chloe, Cam, and Hayden. But, I have only downloaded pics from one of three cameras. I did get pics of the snow!! I HOPE to have my crap together next year. Maybe I'll decorate in one day instead of over the course of a week, maybe I'll bake or even try another gingerbread house. We'll see. Having a baby turned my already chaotic house even more crazy so I was not my normal organized self. Don't laugh. Here are some photos. I may or may not add some more. Probably not, but one can hope.

Camden in his OU beanie

snow! in Texas! on Christmas morning!

snow by the pool

Chandler's haul

Hunter's goodies

Chloe's loot

Hayden's stuff

baby Cam's first Christmas

bitter beer face

watching the game

me and Cam (bad pic of me as a "bow head")

Hayden's homemade "Keep Out" sign... thank goodness for washable markers

Chloe in her Natalie Dee T shirt (reads: Koala Farts Smell Like Cough Drops)

Chloe in the snow (beautiful girl!)

Chloe and Hayden playing in the snow

Tidbits

2009-12-28T18:40:00.004-06:00

Ok, here is what's been going on:

Christmas is FINALLY over, yay! I am so glad and I don't mean to sound like Scrooge at all. Mainly because our house is so over run with baby goodies that I will not be sad to see the tree and other decor go in the attic. Hopefully we'll have won the lottery and gotten a bigger house before next year.... HAHAHAHAHA! LOLOLOLOL! Christmas was a blast as always! Camden's first Christmas didn't disappoint, however I forgot to get him a Baby's 1st Christmas outfit and a pic of him wearing said non-existent outfit... oh well!

I got an IPHONE! I love it so much! It is the funnest thing to play with although I don't know half of the things it is capable of. But give me time! I never want to own another phone. It is SO COOL!

Jon and I are discussing putting our house on the market. Yes, the real estate market isn't great now. But, with prayer, faith, and much intense discussion we feel like if it's the right thing to do we'll know. Also, if it sells quickly that will be a determining factor as well. We aren't 100% sure where we would go but have discussed Grand Prairie near Joe Pool Lake. Personally I would miss my friends over here terribly and our pool and stuff but we need more living space and less yard.

Camden weighs 16 POUNDS! He is getting so big. He is giggling and kicking and is just so full of personality. I just love him to bits. He put on quite a show for family over the holiday and was passed from person to person and boy did he ever ham it up! He has been drooling and chewing like crazy. I think he may be in the beginning stages of teething. Certainly his boobie-biting has been an indicator. Santa brought him some baby cereal and 1st foods, so after his 4 month check up in a few weeks he may be starting solids!

Ok, here's a biggie: what do those of you who live near family do to divide your time with family evenly over the holidays? Jon and I had a pretty heated argument about this over Christmas. Yes, bad timing I know... I absolutely LOVE both of our families to pieces but it seems as if I don't ever get to see enough of them on holidays. We are either at our own house or on the road. What to do? There are only so many days... advice/opinions please!

Chandler took his SATs the other day and scored 1800 out of 2400. I was hoping for a perfect score :) to help him get into a good school or the very least a decent scholarship. I am super proud of him no matter what! He is more than likely gonna retake it, simply to see if he can get a higher score and because when he took it the first time he had 4 hours of sleep, no breakfast and he left his calculator at home.

And, last but CERTAINLY not least: both of Jon's grandmothers passed away within 13 days of each other. So super sad and at Christmas too. His maternal grandmother, Mabel, was in her mid nineties and it was expected that she wouldn't make it til Christmas. But, it was very hard regardless. She was soooo sweet and I loved her so much. Just a sweet kind little lady with a great spirit about her. I will miss her so much. His other grandma, Cecilia, was his stepdad's (from age 5 to 25) mom and she was a feisty redhead like me, so naturally we hit it off from the first time I met her. Her passing was VERY unexpected and hit an already grieving family hard. I am so sorry to all family on hubby's side for such a devastating loss during Christmas. These two neat ladies will be dearly missed. As soon as I can get my scanner working I hope to load some pics of Mabel and Cecilia on here.

And, on that note I am gonna finish my chores and dinner. I hope everyone had an awesome Christmas and I am wishing all of y'all a healthy, prosperous, Happy New Year! Can't wait to hear those resolutions!

Dear Santa,

2009-12-25T00:26:00.004-06:00

Ok, Santa so I realize that my letter is really late this year. As a matter of fact you may be down the street for all I know... but, I am writing you anyway! I think I have been an ok girl this year, maybe I'm on the "Between Naughty and Nice List"? For sure I have held my tongue MANY times and I always let my husband eat and shower before me even when I'm starving and stinky and Camden is crying. I have also kept my road rage in check. Those are good things right? Not to mention I have kept breastfeeding Camden even though one of my nipples is permanently deformed. There are so many good things I could mention, but since you know EVERYTHING I will save myself the trouble. I am not gonna ask for much, Former Girl Scout's Honor. And really since I got a new Iphone(!!!) I really don't need alot.
So without further delay I would like:

A ginormous bottle of Nair and the courage to actually use it. I haven't been able to shave much lately and I am afraid I am gonna tear my sheets or hurt someone with all of the stubble.

The little Asian man down at the pedicure place to rub my feet every night. My bunions have been killing me lately and Jon isn't as good at foot rubs as the little dude down at the nail salon.

Larger towels. I managed to flash the Direct TV guy yesterday. I screamed. He stared. Not pretty. I am surprised he didn't run away. The least he could have done was offer me a free movie or something.

A pair of contact lenses that can resist sliding down the drain. Or maybe a pair a day for the entire year. Maybe if they hadn't slid down the drain yesterday I would have seen the satellite man before I walked past him naked.

Cheesecake in all flavors from the Cheesecake Factory. I am trying to make my butt look more shapely and I am thinking cheesecake might help.

A giant bib. Camden spits up ALOT and every single time I am without protection, he gets me. He is super fast and I am never ready it seems... and I get barfed on alot. A bib would be great!

A better alarm clock. We oversleep frequently and I am tired of rushing every single morning. Not fun.

For Hayden to be more adventurous in the food department. The kid has eaten the same 15 foods for years and I am sick of them, surely he is too...

For Chloe to stop missing the bus. She misses it about 3 days per week. So. Freaking. Annoying. Especially since Hunter goes to the same school as her and he manages to catch the bus. If I get the above mentioned alarm clock that might help a bunch.

I would also really like it alot if Chandler got a JOB. He really needs a job. The kid will be 18 in 3 short months! Preferably not at a food place but instead a place where he can get a discount (Target!).

For Hunter to cut his dang hair! He reminds me of Shaggy or Johnny Depp's portrayal of Willy Wonka. Johnny is a dollface but his Willy Wonka hairdo is fugly. Bobs aren't cute on boys and the last chick who cut Hunter's hair messed it up bad....

Anway, I think that's about it. If you could fulfill all of my Christmas wishes that would be groovy. If not I'll be ok. Really I have lived with/without the stuff I have asked for and I am ok. And, I have an Iphone so I'll survive!

**Merry Christmas Everyone!

Shark!

2009-12-19T19:40:00.004-06:00

So, technically Cam is not supposed to start solids til February or March. However, he appears to be bored with a breastmilk only diet. And, he's decided to broaden his culinary horizon. Food of choice? ME! A couple of times around the 6 to 8 week mark, he "bit" down on the boob that feeds him, hard! After that, he continued to do it once a week or so but this past week it's been EVERY SINGLE FEEDING! Yes, he is toof-less, but it still hurts very bad. So bad that the other day I got tears in my eyes. He won't do it the first 5 or 10 minutes of nursing but waits until he's ready to burp or swap sides. Sometimes he'll do it when I'm half asleep like the 4am feeding or his last feeding of the day. He does it at 6:30 when I should be getting up, and it works. No need for an alarm clock when a small child is trying to chew off your nipple. He bites me every time he lets go or falls asleep. And, he thinks it's funny... because unless he has dozed off he grins at me real big. And, I know he doesn't know any better but I swear he's smiling at me as if to say "LOL Mom, I know that hurts but you won't stop breastfeeding me because you know it's healthiest and you aren't going to flick my cheeks or thump my mouth like some Mommies do." Ugghh! And, he's right. I won't flick him or thump him, but I have yelled out and yep, he smiled BIG! So, I am hope, hope, hoping he stops it- soon! I am so afraid I am gonna look like one of those tribal women from National Geographic if this continues. I have developed anxiety every time I feed him and I don't think it's good for either of us to be anxious during feedings. So, any advice? I need to get this nipped in the nipple before he gets teeth... pun intended :)

back to my not very regular scheduled blogging...

2009-12-17T21:56:00.003-06:00

So, I have had like ZERO internet the last several days, which sucks! And, not to get your hopes up but... I don't have time to blog tonight either. I do have things I am planning on blogging about, but have been very busy lately. As soon as I get a free minute tomorrow I hope to have a new post up!

OMG Ashley look at your butt... and stomach, and thighs, and double chin and...!

2009-12-10T21:28:00.003-06:00

I am sitting here drinking a Coke while a Dove chocolate melts in my mouth and I know that the good times of giving into the cravings are over. Besides, the three C's- chocolate, cheese, and Coke make Camden fart. I had seriously cut down on them when I discovered they made him gassy, but eventually the cravings won me over. But, now that he had his 3 month birthday today, it's TIME! Time to eat healthier and guzzle even more water than I normally do. I try and eat somewhat healthy but I am so nowhere near perfect. I am lucky that I am nursing because it burns so many calories and I feel like if I had tried harder that I could have lost more weight by now. Thankfully I lost every single pound I gained during my pregnancy which is nice, however it's definitely distributed differently. Honestly I don't know how the scale has the same number because my face is puffy, I have a fat belly, and of course there's my boobage, which I swear needs it's own zip code. I am gonna start slowly partly because I am not sure how many calories I should eat and because I don't have time to read labels and count calories like I did before. My plan is to eat healthy, normal portions and not go for seconds. I will allow myself to "cheat" but not everyday like I have been. I am also gonna double my water intake which is already pretty high. For exercise, I am gonna put on my Reebok Easy Tone shoes and do the treadmill while Camden swings or looks at his mobile or something! I may even try and keep them on while I do chores and whatnot. I won't wear them in public though- they are fugly! I am pretty sure that lugging the car seat and carrying around a 13 pound baby will help me in the weights area. I am gonna see how things go on this "plan" of mine for a few months and if I am not showing marked improvement I'm gonna have to join a gym and consult with a trainer. I don't think I was ever meant to be teeny tiny and although I love sports and am pretty athletic I am never gonna be a gym rat, a runner, or a slave to exercise. Life is pretty busy and as long as I try and stay healthy that is what's important. And, first and foremost is my family so I really don't want anything to get in the way of that. I wanna enjoy the last year Chandler is in our home and I want to be able to spoil my last baby as long as he'll let me. Anyway- I guess I am telling you guys this so I can get advice and/or words of encouragement along the way. Wish me luck!

Because I'm "sorta superstitious"

2009-12-10T21:26:00.003-06:00

this is a nothing post.... it's because this post is between 665 and 667 and I don't like that number! Have a great evening :)

Yes, I Know

2009-12-08T16:18:00.008-06:00

I suck at blogging. I am just so super busy, it's insane... I have been trying so hard to keep up with housework, laundry, cooking, bathing etc. that blogging is on the fun list, a list I rarely get to work on. Factor in preparations for Chandler's Senior year such as SAT's, football banquet, cap and gown orders, Senior pics, yearbook stuff etc. that I hardly ever get a moment's peace and when I do I am breastfeeding or changing diapers.
In addition- I have noticed my blog is getting under 20 views per day, ouch! Soon I will have a lovely new CUSTOM MADE header and SHINY NEW PICTURES which I hope translates into me being a better blogger. Crosses fingers... In the meantime, here are a bunch of totally random pictures of totally random stuff. Have a GROOVY day. I am off to decorate the Christmas tree. Oh joy!

hot cocoa bar, Starbucks eat your heart out! Love my CocoMotion all these years later, thanks Aunt Sarah!

YUM-O The Ashley Hot Chocolate Supreme

the Grinch Who Stole Christmas

Chloe and her trophy from Grands!

trying out hats...

every day...

to keep his male patterned bald head warm!

Baby Barf

2009-12-02T01:02:00.004-06:00

Ok, so we got an AMAZING new camera and although it's supposed to be mine I haven't had a chance to play with it yet... but Chloe has. When we were out of town for Thanksgiving she was able to capture an all too frequent event in my daily life: Camden spitting up on me!

Stuffing!

2009-11-26T19:42:00.016-06:00

I don't have a ton of time to blog tonight- one reason being that we are all sharing one computer... which is practically a national tragedy. So, I'm "stuffing" everything into one post. We made it to Oklahoma once again this year for the BMX races. The ride was interesting now that we have Camden- he did very well but when he got hungry or bored you knew it! We had to pull over so I could feed him twice, I did try once to lean over and feed him, which worked a little but made my back hurt and frustrated him. What is normally a 5 hour drive if we stop for dinner and gas took 7 hours this year. So far I am having an ok time- but I really miss Chan who stayed back in Texas. I guess because of Camden and my new routine I feel really weird being away from home in a hotel with a baby. Plus, I really wanted to be with as much family as possible this year and have a memorable first Thanksgiving for Camden. Don't get me wrong this is fun and I've enjoyed it the last few years but I think the novelty has worn off, so I am not sure what next year holds.... It is Chloe's first year to race and Hunter has kinda lost interest so I am wishing her, Jon, and Hayden good luck! I will definitely keep everyone posted. So funny- last year, Chloe and I had fun walking around the venue in our new sweaters and scarves just chillin' and people watching. We saw a lady with a newborn and I mentioned to Chloe how crazy that woman was to have a new baby in a dusty arena and to have to bunk in a hotel for 5 days. Gee, what a difference a year makes! Here I am hanging out with Hunter and Camden- people watching, bunking in a hotel but also stopping to rock, nurse and soothe a 10 week old baby while my Chloe girl races. Weirdness...
Anyway- we stopped for Thanksgiving lunch at Ruby Tuesday where I had a traditional turkey dinner and my family ate buffalo wings... dorks! Now, we are hanging in our hotel room watching Horton Hears a Who and snacking on junk- squeeze cheese on Ritz, pecan pie and birthday cake. That's right- my Hayden is 8!! Happy Birthday Hayden! Thank goodness we did a party at Trail Dust last weekend or I would have felt that he was cheated on his birthday. But really is he? I mean- road trip, junk food, BMX'ing etc? I'm sure he's having a ball! Anywho, I am off to watch the tube. I hope everyone had an awesome Thanksgiving!

snacks!

Hayden and his mini birthday cake in our hotel

me and Hayden at Traildust last weekend

Hayden and his cake at Traildust

taking a bath in the hotel sink

Thanksgiving outfit

They're back to where they once belonged...

2009-11-23T11:46:00.008-06:00

So... in case you were wondering, I got me a new nursing bra! Woo Hoo, I am sooo happy! I went to Nordstrom on the advice of my sisters and got fitted. Now, I won't lie, it was awkward to have the fitter lady tell me to take off my top... and then have to stand there more nekkid than I am used to under fluorescent lighting. She measured me and came in with a few bras and nada, too small. I felt like I was being squeezed by a boa constrictor. She left and came in with another and as soon as I slipped it on I could hear the angels singing. Honestly, I had forgotten what the girls looked like that close! So, I told her I would take it and she went to the register, put it in a fancy Nordstrom shopping bag, and rang me up. $74 dollars later, I am still a happy woman. It wasn't until I got home that I opened the bag and looked at my new bra and all it's fancy glory. It is silky and beige and oh so lacy and pretty, but very sturdy. The hook on the cups is even fancy- a silk loop! The back hooks look like metal- I am sure they are platinum or something... the brand of the bra is embroidered in cursive on the side and the straps are padded and soft. I am seriously afraid to wear it- ya know spit up, milk etc. I looked at the size AFTER I got home. I won't tell you what it was but I'll give you two hints: it's how old I'll be in 3 years and the 8th letter of the alphabet. Now, I'll leave you alone while you count on your fingers....

Youngest and Oldest

2009-11-22T19:09:00.005-06:00

It's hard to believe that my baby Chan is a Senior in high school and it's even harder to believe that I have a new baby boy, Camden to round out our family. So, to preserve the memories forever and to celebrate two such amazing things- a graduation from high school and a new sweet baby- I had a great photographer take pics of the boys for me. Missy Saunders, who is not only a very talented chick, she is also an awesome friend to my sister Kelli. Anyway- I think she did an amazing job as always. She took our Christmas pics last year as well and if I could afford it, I would have her over all the time just to take pics. So, without further ado, I will show you the pics now. She captured a ton of good ones, but I am only posting three each of the boys, simply because Blogger can be slow and I have to pack for our Thanksgiving trip. Here they are:

P.S. Missy's photography site

Camden Cooing!

2009-11-20T07:55:00.006-06:00

Ok, so I'm really really tired... understatement. Camden had a massive belly ache last night (can you say refried beans?). So, I am just gonna add a link to Youtube for you to click on so you can see Camden and me chatting away. Enjoy!

Camden cooing take 1

Camden cooing take 2

Camden cooing take 3

Do your boobs hang low?

2009-11-15T21:08:00.003-06:00

Ok, so I need HELP! It's no secret to anyone that I am currently breastfeeding Camden. But, I have a problem- Elsie* and Daisy* are sagging BAD. And, if I want to remain attractive and keep my breasties from falling out of the bottom and armholes of my shirts I need bra advice NOW! Where in the world can I get a good supportive nursing bra? I currently own 7 and I have purchased them from Motherhood, Target, and JC Penney's. They all stink and they do not work for me at all! Pretty please give me opinions, advice etc.

*formerly Bertha and Martha* They will go back to their previous names when the milk factory closes.

A name and a blessing

2009-11-14T20:05:00.006-06:00

Last Sunday was Camden's blessing. I would have done it MUCH sooner but I've been so busy, imagine that! It turned out nice. Of course he fussed a bit during and we almost didn't make it on time. It is hard to get 7 people out the door by 8:30!! Of course I blubbered like a baby myself during the whole service and especially during the blessing. Afterwards we went to a local park so the kids could play and I had brought muffins, donuts, juices, milk, water etc. It was fun to chat and eat and be with family. The only downfall was the morning was cold and windy, but we still had a nice morning together as a family. I am so very blessed to have such a great family and am so thankful for Cam and that Heavenly Father sent such a sweet Spirit to us. What a great day! And, thanks to everyone for coming and participating and to Lois for snapping some pics for us. We love y'all!

Some of the highlights of Camden's blessing:

* you are blessed with a positive attitude and an obedient spirit

* you are blessed to be born into a loving family with older siblings who will help you

* you will be a blessing and a light to your parents as they raise you in wisdom

* you will have a blessing of education both in public school and throughout life

* you have the blessing that one day you will be able to support a family

* you are blessed with strength, health, and happiness

* you are blessed once again to be a great support to your family

Camden's 2 month check-up

2009-11-13T17:09:00.006-06:00

I CANNOT believe Camden is already 2 months old! Holy Cow! Where in the world does the time go? I took him for his check-up and shots yesterday and that wasn't at all pleasant. The visit itself was fine, if you ignore the fact that I had to wait in a germ infested waiting room and he got painful shots in each chubby thigh and yes they are chubby! He weighs 12 lbs 6 oz and is already 24 and 3/4 inches long, which means he has gained 4 pounds and almost 3 inches!! I am amazed at his growth- he is in the 95th percentile for height and 50th for weight. He is a big strong boy, probably because he nurses ALOT. He's not really fat just a healthy size. We are pretty sure he does have reflux which is causing all the spitting up. I have an RX for Zantac to pick up- $51.00 for 2.5 oz! It better work. Anyway, I really think he nurses so much because he so often spits up whole feedings. We change clothes alot, me and him. Thank goodness my milk is free, otherwise we'd be spending a fortune on formula! In other Camden news, he is rolling over front to back, smiling all the time, sleeping from 12 to 6 every night and my favorite- cooing and kicking his fat legs! He is much more social now and loves to be outside on a blanket soaking up the rays (not direct sunlight of course). I think his favorite thing of all besides nursing is taking a bath. He will sit in there and grin and splash his heart out, which I hope to get a video of soon.
I felt so bad for him when he got his shots. He cried for several hours in pain but would keep spitting up his Tylenol. I got Feverall suppositories, but thankfully didn't need them. After a warm bath and a cuddle he slept all night and is loads better today. Anyway, he is just a cool kid and I am head over heels. I could sit, cuddle and "chat" with him all the live long day! He was blessed this past weekend and I will be putting some photos on here soon. I got one of our family but none of him in his outfit... dang it.

smile! click for a dimple shot, can you see it??

extreme closeup!

cooing....

mid conversation

Titty Baby

2009-11-08T23:02:00.003-06:00

Man, who knew a sweet little innocent baby could turn an entire household upside down and all around? We are all absolutely smitten with Camden, but he can be a stinker. Mainly for me, his primary caregiver and then it's all downhill from there. He is not a bad baby at all, he just knows when I am doing something other than pay attention to him. It goes like this: the split second I get to do something he cries. He has that little alarm in his head that only he can hear. It's the "Mommy is eating, peeing, bathing so I'm gonna scream my head off alarm." This week has been particularly rough. I have been wanting to get out more and I want to go alone. So usually a couple of nights each week after the kids are fed and bathed I will head to Target or Walgreens or maybe stay home for a swim in the tub and all HELL breaks loose. There are two reasons why- Camden wants booby 24/7 and Jon isn't so skilled at keeping him quiet when he's STARVING TO DEATH! So he gets anxious, the big kids get annoyed and I get a million phone calls or a screaming baby plopped in the bouncer and next to my bubbly bath. The second reason- he wants to eat so often that I literally have a boob out all day. I strongly suspect he may have reflux. Simply because he gulps down an entire feeding, barfs it up, has insanely bad hiccups and then it starts all over again. Thankfully he's gaining weight and I will be questioning his doctor for advice at his checkup Thursday. I guess other than it being 1 step forward, 2 steps back every day around here it wouldn't be so bad but it's trying alot of the time. It doesn't help that I have close to no patience when I have stuff I need to do, like bathe. I am quickly learning to ignore my hairy legs, dust bunnies and baskets of clothes in favor of showers and regular meals. I wish he would get better at sucking his thumb or would take a pacifier or something! Or, it's gonna be nutty around here til he's old enough for solid food. Heaven help me....

thumbsucker!

2009-11-03T19:14:00.006-06:00

Out of the first four kiddos Chandler and Chloe were the only ones who would suck on something to self soothe. Chan had a binky til 18 months and Chloe sucked her two middle fingers until she was 4, stopping only after she accidentally shut her fingers in a dresser drawer. Well, now The Camster is sucking his thumb! I know most moms would freak out about this but I think it's adorable! I will cross the Buck Tooth Bridge when we come to it. I am just glad he wants to use something besides myself for a pacifier. So, I took a few pics of him. He is so CUTE! As soon as I laid him on his new playmat that Shannon made he laid there looking at the beautiful patterns, sucking his thumb content as could be for about 30 minutes, which is awesome. He still has a pretty short attention span and gets cranky or bored after too long. Anyway- I just thought it deserved a blog post. Oh and I threw in two random photos because I felt like it.

thumb and index finger sucker

thumbsucker

me and the Chlomeister

red hair

priceless... baby and kitty edition

2009-11-01T19:28:00.007-06:00

Fisher Price whale bathtub- $24.99
Johnson & Johnson baby bath- $5.99
family pet from SPCA- $75.00
having a friend hang out and chat while you bathe- priceless

Let it be known that:
A. That I have discovered that I am not an animal lover, merely a tolerater
B. We have NEVER had a pet when my kids were babies, until now
C. Our cat is NUTS. Case in point- he walks around with a high heel shoe in his mouth every night lately.... I am not sure if he is going out sluttin' it up or what...
D. I DO NOT like when he's around the baby but this time it was way too cute.

Pedro jumped in when I was settling Cam down for his bath this morning and stayed until the baby got excited and splashed, then he ran for dear life.

Happy Halloween

2009-11-01T01:04:00.018-05:00

hot dogs- check
friends- check
kids in cute costumes- check
big boys at a party- check
trick or treating- check
baby's first Halloween- check
too much candy- check
TIRED- check
pictures- double check!!!

Hope everyone had a fun, safe, tummy ache and swine flu free Halloween!

my sweet sleeping Tootsie Roll

there's a Tootsie Roll in my living room

sleeping candy Cam- look at those fingers...

staring at his new mobile

Chloe as Octomom

Octomom- again

hangin' out with our pumpkin

in the bumbo, looking at the fan

Hayden as Ironman

and again...

Got Milk?

2009-10-29T00:04:00.005-05:00

Family Update

2009-10-26T15:31:00.006-05:00

It has been way too long since I blogged about me, Jon, and my big kids, oops! So, I figured it was time. And, you know I'm gonna talk about Cam too, can't leave him out! Here goes:

Me!
I am slowly but surely figuring out how to juggle me, marriage, 4 big kids, 1 little kid and a whole lotta etcetera. For sure getting a good nights sleep and the SUN coming out helps as does getting out. I have been very reluctant to get the baby out but the last 10 days I have gone to lunch (thanks Barb), 2 birthday parties and a trunk or treat. Being able to fit into my "skinnier" jeans, put on makeup and socialize has helped my mood tremendously. I feel like I whine alot and I apologize but I am still in shock! I had gone so many years set in my ways and used to the dynamics of our family of 6 that is has been an adjustment. But I am managing. I have had to laugh instead of cry, leave stuff undone and just relax. Life is too short and precious to make mountains out of molehills. I am blessed beyond measure and I am so thankful for that.

Jon!
Jon is picking up lots of slack for me I guess you could say. He is doing lots of errands and grocery shopping, things I would normally do. He lets me out here and there (that sounds bad) to get a pedicure or piddle around Target but it's stressful for him since Cam is a titty baby and screams the whole time I'm gone. I was able to get 4 bottles of breastmilk pumped and frozen for emergencies only, but Jon already used them up... for the baby. I appreciate him way more than I say and he is a great husband and father. It is pretty cool to be able to see the love he has for me and the kids just by the way he looks at us. I know that he is stressed and worries about supporting us, but he doesn't let it show. He is pretty cool, I think I'll keep him.

Chan
Oh Chan Man. What can I say? He is my big teddy bear. Boy is he ever laid back though. I won't say lazy but... He is STILL undecided about college and will more than likely get his feet wet in the adult world by attending a local college for a 2 year degree first. I am not sure if he wants to move out as soon as he graduates or not, I refuse to have that conversation. The thought of my first baby birdy leaving the nest is not a topic I wish to discuss. He did have two more medical mishaps since I last blogged- a dislocated elbow and a sprained MCL. Which means he got to play a whopping TWO football games his Senior year of high school. I know he is bummed but I am hoping he can focus that energy on getting super good grades instead. We'll see!

Hunter
Hunter is my other teddy bear. He is a cool kid and I have really enjoyed chatting with him lately. He and I have gone on a few errands together and found ourselves home alone a couple of times and have had the chance to catch up which has been great. He is growing up right before my eyes, as a matter of fact he is taller than me now! He is taking a hiatus from BMX and is getting interested in football again. Too bad the season is almost over... He had a small glitch for awhile in the form of X-Box Live, which he wanted to play all the time and it was affecting his moods and whatnot so we had a long talk and I have nipped that problem in the bud. I can't believe he is gonna be in high school next year! Holy Cow!

Chloe
Oh my pretty girl! She is growing up way too fast. I look back at photos of her from a year ago and can't believe my eyes! She is soo beautiful! And, she is in love with her baby brother. She was super bummed when she found out he was a HE and it took her a few days to warm up to him but now- she is mommy #2 around here. She changes diapers like a champ, talks to him, makes little videos of him on her camera and generally is a huge help. She has been honing her gymnastics skills like you would not believe. She was on a competitive team when she was 5 but got burned out really quick from the constant practices but thankfully she was able to stay strong. She has now taught herself how to do a standing backtuck and has almost perfected her aerial. She has also been hanging out with friends at their houses and has even gone to the mall and a parade without her mommy. She has anxiety and would normally never go anywhere without me or Jon. She is changing and growing so much. I am so proud of her.

Hayden
He is my little buddy. We have always been pretty close since he was born. I quit my job to stay home with him almost 8 years ago and I have enjoyed every minute. He was bumped from being Mommy's Littlest Boy when Camden was born and I think he is handling it ok. There are moments when I can tell he is frustrated at me and I feel so bad. He has even told me that I have been mean to him since the baby came and that makes me feel an inch tall. I have tried to be more patient and loving towards him, the last thing I want is for him to feel as if he was replaced. In addition to his mean mommy our neighbors just moved and they had twin 7 year old girls that he played with every day, I know he is gonna miss them BAD. Poor baby. He is so sweet and has a huge heart and I am so glad he is mine. I am gonna try super hard to make his birthday next month extra special.

Camden
Oh the baby boy! He is changing soo much it's nuts! He is smiling more and more and I am pretty sure he has a little dimple. He is rolling over from front to back which is way too soon. He has had a few rough nights where he stayed up all night long, that was not fun at all! He has yet to sleep a full night in his crib preferring instead to be tucked up next to me with a boob for a pillow. I am still seeing red in his hair which is just odd. None of my kids have red hair or dimples.... I am so glad he is here. He makes our whole family smile!

And that's it for now. I am trying to limit my time on the computer, so I won't be blogging as much. Not that I had been anyway! I feel better when I accomplish more around the house and one nursing session with the laptop open can last way too long. Keep reading though. And I might add new pics eventually....

Facebook status update rejects

2009-10-22T15:19:00.003-05:00

Ashley Anderson Myers-

wonders if the kids would notice if I put breastmilk in their cereal

never thought she'd have crusty old lady heels... but alas it happened

is so glad Camden doesn't complain about her never ending morning breath

would love to go to the bathroom minus the audience, namely a cat and 6 week old baby

can't believe she found a hair that LONG under her armpit!

Dolly Parton eat your heart out...

is hoping that by not shaving my legs I'll stay warmer in winter...

found a Dorito in her bra, but is ok with it since it means she got lunch and so did Camden

smells like spit-up and is totally cool with it

wonders how many times she has flashed her children a breast...

is starting to sympathize with Pigpen from The Peanuts cartoon

thinks her butt is becoming fused to the couch and that she is quite possibly developing a bad case of "Secretary Spread"

Thinks she heard the cat call her Wide-Load

All the single ladies...

2009-10-20T00:18:00.006-05:00

Hey girls. My name is Camden McCay and I am 5 weeks old. I weigh about 11 pounds and am gaining weight by the second. I just recently rolled over from front to back (scared me half to death at first) and I smile and coo at whomever will talk to me. I am thinking I am gonna have sandy blond hair with my mommy's red highlights when it grows in all the way. I already have a receding hairline but give me time. I'll have thick, luxurious, run your fingers through my hair locks in no time. I love warm milk and typical of all men- I am a boob man. I make no apologies for that, I can't help myself. Powdered milk and rubber nipples, no thank you. I am a snacker and eat every hour, but only for 15 minutes at a time. The other 45 are open to cooing, smiling, cuddling and whatever else your heart desires. I enjoy long walks in my stroller and dinner by candlelight, ok nightlight. My mom thinks my neck is ultra cuddly and kissable, especially when I am freshly bathed and don't smell like spit-up. What? I have a sensitive tummy. And, I hope you don't mind- but I still crash at my parent's place. They have a giant king size bed and mine just seems cold and lonely. I like to cuddle with my mommy and she is my first love. Also, this needs to be said, much like a typical boy- I'm gassy... I realize this is alot to take in, but I am worth it. Promise. So, if you're under age 1 and would like to chill- call, text or email me.

Crazy... but true!

2009-10-14T22:58:00.005-05:00

Today me, Jon, and Camden went to the hospital to see our friend Shawna's new baby. We snuck in past all hospital authority figures since we had a baby with us. With the flu going around lots of places like doctor's offices and hospitals are very strict on visitors. We stayed a little over an hour after which we headed out to grab lunch before we had to get Hayden. We left through the double doors that go in and out of the maternity ward, the same way we came in. Outside of maternity was a little foyer with restrooms and such and then a big waiting area past the foyer. When we were leaving we passed an older woman who was in regular business attire but she had on her hospital ID. She glanced at us, said good afternoon, and proceeded into the maternity area. Jon took the baby, my diaper bag and purse and went to the foyer while I went to wait for the restroom to be available. I hadn't been there a minute when the double maternity doors flew open and the same lady I saw before came rushing out, very frantic. She saw me standing there and proceeded to scan the hallway and foyer area like she was looking for someone. Then she saw me. That's when she started to grill me, and she was puzzled AND worried, you could see it in her face. She asked me why I was there, was I visiting someone, was that my baby, where was the baby at, how old was the baby, etc etc. I looked at her kinda odd and answered all of her questions: I was there to see a friend who just had a baby, yes the other baby was mine, he was 5 weeks old, he was with my husband in the foyer (thank goodness Jon walked into sight at that exact moment) and she was more than welcome to go look at him. I told her he was little (she said she noticed that) but was obviously not brand new. I also told her his circumcision and belly button were all healed up, which no brand new baby would have healed from already. She still looked kinda worried but as I answered her questions she seemed to calm down a bit. And after all was said and done all she said was that she thought maybe their security system that rings an alarm and shuts down every entry/exit door was on the fritz... not an apology or anything. And, while I think it's great that she was aware and doing her job it would have been nice if she had apologized or something!! It was very embarrassing as there were several other people in the foyer as well. When we were walking out I kept expecting security to tackle us or something... Seriously though, I think I'll stay home for a little while longer. Or at least I will steer clear of the maternity/newborn area of all local hospitals.

Birth Story Part 2 (long long long)

2009-10-11T17:23:00.015-05:00

So, where was I? Oh yeah, my OB wanted to check my progress so he left the room and I dropped trou. And then he came back in and he checked me. And it hurt really alot. And, I was a whopping 3... THREE! I knew it. I knew I wasn't more than a 4 at most. He told me to go straight to the hospital. Wow, panic much? I told him that wasn't possible as I had to go get my hubby, my bag and drop the kids off at the sitter's. I told him the earliest I could get there would be in at least an hour maybe two. I knew I had things to do and it would take longer than he would have liked. Grudgingly he said OK and off I went. To Target. What? I knew we needed cat food and stuff for a quick dinner, since my mom would be with the kids. And, history repeated itself- I stopped and held onto my cart and breathed through contractions. They were still coming at 5 minute intervals and boy did I get ALOT of stares. The checkout girl told me I was nuts and brave. Wasn't that sweet of her? Anyway, I got in my car and called Jon and told him to get ready and I headed home. Of course I got stuck in 3 school zones, behind 2 school buses AND a tractor on a two lane road. I could have passed it but I couldn't see past all the dust he was kicking up. It took me 10 minutes longer than normal to drive home!

Once inside I had Chloe load my bags and the car seat in the van and Hayden helped her put the groceries away, while I did a load of laundry and took out some trash. This whole time Jon was panicking and it was cute and funny. I don't think I've ever seen him so fidgety and nervous and sweaty! He kept thinking I was gonna drop the baby out on the kitchen floor or something. Obviously he has forgotten I don't labor that way, I dawdle. Finally I got in the car and we headed out stopping to drop the kids at Erin's. Jon wanted to let them run in but I went in to say hi and grab a bottle of water. He was getting more nervous by the second and finally got in the car and I believe he may have honked. I was still having every 5 minute contractions but they weren't that bad. Finally we were on our way and when we got to the hospital Jon was annoyed that I didn't want to be dropped off but instead would park and walk with him. We go upstairs and get the last and smallest delivery room available. Of course. That has happened to me with 3 out of 5 kids. I met my nurse and she told me to get dressed in a gown and she would get my IV started. I chose to pace the room for awhile. I was dreading being stuck in bed for who knew how long. After 30 minutes or so I took a quick sponge bath and put on my gown and climbed in bed.

My nurse came in, (it was nearing 6:00 I believe) started my IV and bid me good luck as she was headed home. The new nurse was AWESOME! She was super sweet and I just knew it was gonna a smooth ride. Sorta. As soon as I got the IV of fluids and antibiotic started and the fetal monitor on my contractions intensified but were still only 5 minutes apart. And, I was miserable. When she came in to look in on me I begged her to check me because it had been almost 2 hours (it was 8:00 now) of non stop pain and I was POSITIVE I was at a 6 or 7. I hadn't been checked once at that point which I found odd. Anyway, I was still a THREE!! Crap! I decided at that point that an epidural was in order if I was gonna survive labor. I was really really mad at myself at that point because I had grand plans to have an unmedicated delivery and I wasn't even gonna let my OB break my water. Hah! The anesthesiologist couldn't come quick enough. When he came in I told him about all my back problems and he said he would try his best to make it work. Well, I now know what it feels like to be shot or stabbed or bent in half. The pain from the first (yes first) attempt was worse than any contraction could ever hope to be. When he said "that didn't work I'll have to try again" I almost died. Really I wasn't sure I could go through another attempt. It was horrible. I can't even stress that enough. I have never felt that kind of pain in my life, ever. Evidently my back is really messed up from prior epidurals. I felt pain go down each leg and it was AWFUL! The second try was just as painful but it WORKED! Yeehaw!

After it kicked in Jon and I sat and we and waited. Jon surfing the internet and me texting friends and chilling. At around 8:30 Erin came to visit and brought Jon some smelly Taco Bell for dinner. She stayed for a bit and while she was there my OB came and I let him break my water. And he checked me and I was still a THREE! Wow, I never expected that. I also never expected my doctor to watch Family Guy between talking to me and doing his doctor stuff. At around 10 Erin left and I started to doze and so did Jon. He was snoring soo loud and poor thing was sleeping in the littlest chair I had ever seen. Basically he and I dozed for hours and it was really nice. At midnight I was checked again and was finally a SEVEN, woo hoo. So, back to sleep I went. I would only wake briefly to eat ice chips and tell Jon to shut up! I do remember my nurse coming in alot to hold the monitor on my tummy and have me roll on my sides as his heart rate kept fluctuating so much. At around 1:30 I could feel him in the birth canal or so I think. I am pretty sure he could have been born very soon at that point but I was way too groggy to tell my nurse I felt like pushing. I am thinking it didn't look like I was making much progress on the monitors as my contractions never would peak very high even though they had been coming quicker and quicker. Who knows. I just distinctly remember pressure like when you have to push. I do know he had a bad cone head which doesn't make sense since I only pushed a little before he finally came out. It will forever remain a mystery.

Anyway- back to the story. At around 3:35ish my doctor came in to examine me and I was 10, even though I knew I had been complete for at least a little while. Jon and I were both sooo groggy it didn't seem real at all. I felt like I was drunk or dreaming or both. But man I was ready! We chatted a bit and he had me do a couple of practice pushes. He told me I was a great pusher and the baby would likely come quick. My doctor got dressed and a ton of people from the NICU came in (just in case) as the baby had pooped already. Stinker! Then I started pushing. And, I pushed through 3 whole contractions (which took less than 10 minutes) and out he came at 4:11 am! I couldn't believe he had reddish hair and that he was so fat! It was so surreal as it always is when you deliver a baby. That little thing that was kicking you is there! In the room! And then it begins... the sleep deprivation, the sore boobies, the crying, the yellow poop, the never ending love, the smiles, the bills and on and on and on. And, here we are a month later trying to make it through each day. It's harder than I realized but I am so happy and in love. I am tired and I have bad breath and dowdy clothes. My house is a freakin' hazard. I can't figure which end is up... But I know it gets easier and I also know that before you know it he's a big smelly kid about to fly the nest and I am gonna miss him so bad... For now, I am trying to not sweat the small stuff and enjoy my babies. He is gorgeous and sweet and I think he might want a baby sister....

hahaha, I am totally serious!

breathing through a contraction

falling in love...

checking for red hair!

chillin'

headed home! I wonder if he knew what he was in for?

p.s. read this, an old post I did when all my kiddos went off to school. Little did I know....

Soul Searching

2009-10-08T22:52:00.003-05:00

I am not gonna say I'm overwhelmed, even though I'm overwhelmed. And, I figured out why. It's not because I had my 5th child, it's because I don't manage my time well and I don't prioritize. Really what's important day to day? Facebook? I don't think so. Six hour naps? Nope. Watching recorded shows that aren't erased until I erase them? No siree. Basically unless I have somewhere to go I spend my days napping, online or watching the telly, while I nurse the baby. Now that Piggy Flu is rampant and I have a newborn who isn't leaving the house until the pandemic is over, I am in my pj's ALL DAY and I am starting to feel like a LOSER. Yes, there are days when a nap is a necessity like when Cam is up til 4 am. However, I don't need one everyday and I don't need to sleep more than a couple of hours. Then there's the computer. I am on it ALOT. Checking my blog and Facebook and constantly looking at the same lame crap. Other than fun little comments on Facebook and reading blogs, I am wasting a ton of time online. I could look at all my friends blogs and FB in less than 15 minutes a day. When what I am doing is staying on for hours at a time. Have I read my scriptures? No. Have I exercised? No. Is my housework and laundry done? No. Do I feel like I am getting stuck in a rut of feeling down and being lazy? Yes. By the time I get off the computer each day my kids are walking in the door and I am frantically trying to shower and clean and I am usually cranky because I am mad at myself. I deserve better and so do my children. I am not judging those of you who spend time on your computers or lounge in your pj's. I am just saying that for me life could be more than I am making of it. Yes, it's fun to talk to my friends online, scoping out blogs and read cheesy celebrity gossip. But, I am making a habit of doing that each day and not alot else. I don't think I have an addiction, but I do have a bad habit. And I really really want to try and turn over a new leaf. I want to embrace each day and live it to the fullest. Sure, I need to spend some time each day doing chores and cooking but there are so many more things I could do that I am not doing because there's no time. I waste it sitting on my bum. I would love to go for a walk with Camden in the fresh air. I wouldn't mind reading Hayden a story and holding him til he falls asleep. Or going on a date with my big boys and for ice cream with Chloe. I wanna lay under the stars on a blanket and have hot cocoa with my hubby. I wanna have family game night and family prayer and on and on. I am gonna quote a line in a cheesy Miley Cyrus song- life's what you make it so let's make it right. And, that's exactly what I want to do. So, I may not blog or Facebook as much but I still will some and it may take awhile to break the habit. It will be hard and it will require diligence and prayer. And, my main motivation is my kids and my self worth. I really don't think I want to be remembered by my children as the mommy blogger who chats on FB with her friends. I want to be the fun mom who makes her and her family's happiness Numero Uno. Wish me luck.

A Happy List: new baby, tired mommy edition

2009-10-03T23:23:00.009-05:00

Since I recently squeezed out a baby things are nuts around here. And, if you read my blog on a regular basis you know that and you are probably sick of reading about it. But, who cares. I have a houseful of kids and as much as I love them, they don't give me near as much blog content as Camden. Eventually I'll blog about something else... So, on that note, I am gonna do a list. A list of things that make the crying (mine and his) and utter chaos and exhaustion almost forgettable. These things make me happy and they pretty much rock!

1. Being able to sleep on my tummy. I waited months to do this again and wouldn't you know my baby will only sleep good during the day, in some one's arms, or with a tit in his mouth. Which means I rarely get to sleep on my tummy except when I nap with him during the day. And when I do, I sleep like a freaking petrified log and it feels amazing!

2. When I actually get to eat with both hands and while my food is still warm. I have been standing up to eat while nursing the babe at the same time for 3 weeks and my food is ALWAYS cold. And, it just so happens that the moment I sit down with a plate or bowl of food he wakes up. I am thinking maybe I should follow my dog's lead and forget utensils and limbs altogether!

3. Watching my older children love on and care for their baby brother. They love to hold him and kiss him. Hunter wants to hold him all the time and Chloe is proving to be a master diaper changer and baby soother. Chandler and Hayden just look at him ALOT. They love to stare at him and caress his cheeks. I seriously have to hold back the tears. I am SO in LOVE with my children.

4. A shower. I am a bath girl all the way and the exact moment he turns 6 weeks old I am taking a bath- with scalding hot water, a candy bar, an ice cold glass of something yummy, and a trashy magazine like People. And, yes I will lock the door to the bedroom and the bathroom. But, back to showers. When you have on the same pj's as the day before and you smell like eau de spit up, a shower feels like pure bliss.

5. Being allowed, no make that forced to eat 500 extra calories per day because I am nursing. Some days I get my extra calories in the form of something healthy like an apple with peanut butter and other days it's a Snickers bar. I do feel a bit guilty, a little tiny bit. But, I also know that breast milk is always uber healthy and I think that Cam secretly likes Snicker flavored milk anyway...

6. Dressing Camden in all his CUTE clothes. I bought and was given (both new and hand me down) some of the most adorable clothes for him ever. I try and change him twice a day. What? He likes it... It does bum me out a little that no one gets to see him in them but oh well, there's always pictures. He likes photo shoots at home too.

7. Staring at and touching my baby. I could do it all day long. He has this one little spot on his ear that's just one random tuft of hair and I love to poke at it. And his feet are like rose petals and his cheeks and head are like warm velvet. And I could go on and on. Babies are like a drug. I swear as much as I think Michelle Duggar has like way too many kids, I think I can figure out why. Oh man, I wanna go hold him NOW!

8. Giving him his daily bath. As soon as the nastiness that was his umbilical cord fell off I filled his baby tub with warm water and in he went. And, he LOVED it. Still does. I imagine he relates it to being in my tummy in a bag full of warm amniotic fluid. He is just so relaxed when he's in the tub you can see it in his little face. That is one area where he takes after his mommy- baths are awesome. And, he smells amazing afterwards! Goodbye curdled milk, hello Johnson and Johnson!

9. Nursing Cam. It is seriously an amazing feeling to be able to feed your baby with milk that your body makes for them especially. And to see them get fat and healthy from it is even more awesome. Having a child really is a miracle and one of the most beautiful things ever. No offense to those of you who formula feed, just because it's not something I have ever done. But really, breastfeeding your baby is such a special experience. Try it, you'll thank me later.

10. Having my whole family home with me on the weekends. We usually never cook dinner (amen to take out) and we ALWAYS have dessert. We could be watching cheesy TV while I feed the baby or someone is on the computer and someone else is reading a book. But, we are together in our cozy house just here, just being us. And it's awesome. Once again- I am so in LOVE with my family. And, I am BLESSED beyond measure.

That's it for now. Right now I am just feeling all warm and cozy. So, I am gonna go kiss all my kiddos and straighten out their covers while I smooth the hair across their foreheads. Then I am gonna wake up my baby and rub his little feet while I give him a midnight snack. After which I will kiss my hubby goodnight and then say a prayer thanking Heavenly Father for all of my wonderful amazing blessings. The end.

Birth Story Part 1

2009-10-03T00:23:00.006-05:00

So, it's only taken three whole weeks to get this done. I have been a little busy, to the point of making sure I put eating and showering on my to do list. Plus, my brain is so foggy that it hurt to think of all the birth details... I am gonna give it a try. And, be warned, other than a GORGEOUS baby it's not that exciting but it's long, just because there are lots of little details, (so many that I am gonna do it in two parts). I mean I didn't deliver him in my car and my water didn't break at Target although Jon was afraid it would.

If you recall on September 9th I had the option of an induction. Well, after lots of soul searching and prayer I decided that our baby would come when he was ready. Besides, I knew by the way my body was acting that he was gonna come that day. I had a mother's intuition and I secretly hoped he would come at 9:09 that evening so I could have the distinction of a 9-9-09 at 9:09 baby... So, that morning I got up, called the hospital to cancel the induction, got my kids off to school and went to take my every morning nap. Jon was off that day so I knew I could be lazy all the live long day. I slept from 8 til about 11. When I got up I made me some lunch and plopped my booty on the computer to eat and get in some Facebook time. I was only able to pick at my sandwich a little bit because I had an honest to goodness contraction. I kept quiet though just in case. I did get a little antsy though and I started to do my daily chores like making the beds, laundry and sweeping. I was trying to keep my mind off of the contractions that by then were coming every 15 minutes. I remember telling Jon to go ahead and pack his bag because I was positive our baby was coming some time that day. I finished my chores and made a few phone calls to my mom and sisters. At that point I knew I was in early labor but I was still in denial....

At around 1:30 I jumped in the tub so I could get ready for my 3:00 OB checkup. My contractions were still coming every 15 minutes. By the time I got out of the tub they were coming every 7 to 10 minutes. I managed to get my makeup, clothes and jewelry on while I timed the contractions. They were strong enough to get my attention but not so bad that I couldn't function. I drove to my appointment and when I was sitting in the waiting room they decided to come at 5 minute intervals and boy did they get more painful quick. I would also get an intense urge to vomit with each one so I asked the receptionist for an emesis basin. She said they didn't have any but she would find something. She came out into the waiting room carrying a red Bio-Hazard bag that was large enough for a dead body. Dumb ass... Finally I was called back to be put through the normal prenatal crap- blood pressure check, urine, etc. I told my nurse I was in early labor and she told me once again he probably wouldn't check me (I was in too much pain to argue) but would more than likely send me to the hospital. So, I sat on the table fully dressed and I waited... for 30 minutes while he was in the next room with a patient. I learned so much about birth control that day. In between timing contractions and cursing my OB under my breath, I was rubbernecking. Mainly because I was trying to listen for him to be finished with his other patient and partly because other than text my hubby and sisters and time contractions, what was I supposed to do? Finally he came in and asked me why I wasn't undressed!? I told him his nurse told me to stay clothed because he would more than likely send me to Labor and Delivery. I swear those two... Anyway his exact words were: "I wanna check you and make sure you're not a 7 or 8. I don't want you to deliver in Albertson's." Well, I knew from past experience I was maybe a 4 and besides I was planning on hitting Target on my way home not Albertson's.

Part 2 coming soon

Amazing Design Duo

2009-10-01T22:24:00.003-05:00

Hey all! If you are in the market for a custom blog design at an amazing price check out April Showers Blog Design. April is a fabulous designer and has now teamed with Jessica, another fabulous artist pursuing a degree in Graphic Design. Together they are an AWESOME design duo. Go, go now I say and get you a groovy new header, background or maybe even the whole shebang... I know I am!

Under construction...

2009-10-01T15:51:00.003-05:00

Ok, so I am in the process of getting a new header and layout made. Also, I am composing my scatter brain to do my birth story. Please keep checking back as this is a work in progress and my time is in super SHORT supply..... remember: patience is a virtue!

Umbilicus Frustratus...

2009-09-28T23:26:00.010-05:00

Camden's belly button/umbilical cord stump has been giving me fits. Probably because I have been so anxious to try out his new bathtub... He went for his 2 week checkup on Friday (he has gained 10oz and 1/2 an inch) and his pediatrician told me his cord would likely stay attached for several more weeks. She said he had a flat cord, meaning it was attached straight and flat across his belly button and that no air was getting to it which helps it dry out and eventually fall off. It had been oozing and bleeding a tiny bit here and there but nothing bad. Back when all my other kids were born you put alcohol on the cord to speed the drying up and falling off of the cord. Apparently that is no longer standard, you just keep the diaper folded down and continue sponge bathing so it doesn't get wet. I was told by the doctor that if it hadn't fallen off by the time he's one month old that I should bring him in and they would use a silver nitrate stick to burn it off. Lovely. Well, apparently all of her picking, poking and prodding sped the "healing process" right on up... That night around 10 or so he got fussy- BAD. He would scream as if he was in pain but only sporadically. I thought it was gas and that we were in for a long night. And, boy were we. He cried like he was hurting all night long and he would draw his legs up, much like when they have gas pains. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was hurting him. I changed him by nightlight a few times and saw teeny spots of pus on his onesie but no more than I had previously. He didn't fall into a deep sleep until around 7 am and that was only after I swaddled him up like a burrito. At 11 Chloe came in and woke me up and as I was getting ready for my day I had her unwrap him so he would wake up to eat. That is when she asked me in a panic if I had seen his belly button.... what I saw freaked me out beyond belief. I had never seen so much blood and pus on a newborn baby in my life. Plus, his belly button was hard, hot, and swollen. So, in a panic I called Erin and had her rush over- since she's down the street, and, she too was in shock and had never seen anything like it either. I immediately called the nurse's line at my pediatrician's office and they advised me to clean it as often as possible with alcohol and they had me draw a line around the redness on his tummy. If the redness went past the line I drew he would have to go to the ER. Thankfully by the next morning the swelling, redness and leftover stump were gone! Whew, I was so afraid it was infected and that he was gonna need antibiotics at such a young age not to mention being in the ER with all the other sickies. Man, kids sure do keep you on your toes...

Camden's swollen belly button (yes my ink line was way off)

his onesie soaked in blood, pus and laundry detergent

Homecoming Mums

2009-09-24T00:00:00.012-05:00

This week me and my friend Erin made Chandler and Hunter mums for Homecoming. Those two stinky boys informed me they had dates for Homecoming 1 week before Camden was due to arrive. I informed them (with smoke coming out of my ears) that as soon as I got the baby here safely and had a day or two to recover that I would make mums. And, true to my word when Camden was 6 days old I took my hot post pregnant bod to Michael's with Erin and shopped for supplies. Of course I left Jon in charge of all the kids and he did splendidly even though the baby screamed for breast milk almost the entire time. It was nice to get out even though I was a bit scatterbrained and Erin had to pretty much shop for me. Making them was fun if not a little interesting, simply because we kept burning our fingers on the glue gun and I had to stop and breastfeed ALOT. Thank goodness I had Erin on diaper and rocking duty... she swore she didn't mind! On another note- I just want to say how absolutely grateful I am to Miss Erin. I have known her for about 4 years but it feels like a lifetime. She is an AMAZING friend and has been there for me so many times and I can never thank her enough. She arranged all of our dinners to be brought in for a solid week, brought me lunch, sat with Camden so I could shower, helped me make and deliver mums, and even ran over at a moment's notice to watch the baby so I could run all the way out to Jon's shop (what? we live on almost 2 acres....) She has been a lifesaver! Love you Erin. Anyway- I'll shut up now and show you the mums. I will hopefully get awesome pics of the boys and their dates up Saturday.

The silver and white mum is for Chan's date. Apparently all Seniors do a silver and white mum. The pics don't show the cute stuff we added (my camera stinks). But there is a whistle, a lipgloss, Sharpie marker, musical notes, Tootsie Rolls, and Dum Dum pops in addition to all the footballs (him) and tennis stuff (her). It was gonna have bubble wands too, but I forgot... Either way-I love it and I hope she does too!!

The blue and black is for Hunter's date. She's a freshman and he's in 8th! Hers has alot of the same stuff as the other one except his date is on the swim team and she has a rabbit's foot on hers. I am kinda bummed that I didn't get a chance to add bubble wands or a BMX bike like I had planned and I was gonna do lights but they would only last 8 hours. But, she loved it as much as I did so that's a good sign!

And she's overwhelmed.... week 2 as a family of 7

2009-09-22T23:56:00.005-05:00

Wow! Overwhelmed is a massive understatement.... It has been interesting around here. Let's just say my recovery period officially ended Sunday evening. I love my hubby to death, but he ran out of steam around the time the visitors stopped coming in droves. He lasted longer than I thought. He has been getting Hayden from school on his lunch break which is great, and does a random chore here or there- but it's never really enough. Basically things are one step forward two steps back around here. I am constantly nursing, changing diapers, or washing baby clothes. Today alone Camden went through 7 outfits! I am lucky to get a shower and to brush my teeth around 1 each morning. With the big kids, Jon, laundry, dishes, school stuff, my Facebook addiction and the baby- it's the earliest I get a moment to myself. A smart mommy would leave crap undone, but I just can't. One night this past week I got in bed at 1 and Camden woke up at 2 and stayed up til 6.... I was climbing into bed when my kids were having breakfast. Then there's the animals, they are always looking at me with hunger in their eyes. But really- they're fine and besides how am I supposed to nurse a baby when I barely have time to eat? Thank goodness for granola bars and Hot Pockets! And, speaking of food- our dinner fairies stopped bringing food on Sunday. So sad... I think Jon took it harder than anyone. Man, was it ever nice. So far this week we aren't setting the world on fire with our own home cooked meals either. Last night- chili dogs, tonight- Dairy Queen. Seriously I gotta do some intense healthy meal planning since my diet officially restarts Monday. I am only 12 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight. You gotta love breastfeeding, I have lost 6 pounds since Sunday! Woo hoo! Anyway... back to my rambling. I am trying my hardest to spread myself out and be Supermom, but it's easier said than done. Don't get me wrong, I am so in love with my family and our beautiful new son. But, I didn't know stress til now! There have been funny moments as well. Like, Cam's insanely loud bowel movements that produce a dime size spot of poop and the random giggles and smiles he is so good at while sleeping. I think my biggest guilt feeling/gripe though is spreading me around so everyone gets attention and in the process I am neglecting Ashley... Which, I guess is a gripe nearly every mom I know also has. So, it has been crazy, fun, intense, exhausting- you name it! Basically, I guess we are trudging along and having a happy chaotic time figuring out our new normal- whatever normal is?!

P.S. I also managed to make two homecoming mums this week, with tons of help from my friend Erin. I literally gave up two showers to make those bad boys. You're welcome Chandler and Hunter... I will post pics soon.

Camden is 1 week old!

2009-09-17T19:43:00.010-05:00

Oh man, I have been wanting to blog but I am barely keeping my head above water. So, this post will probably be kinda long and hopefully not at all boring....

First things first- yes I am gonna blog about my "birth story" eventually and I have given myself a month to update the blog title and add new photos since we are no longer a family of 6. I just need to search for a header and background I like and also new pics need to be taken. That being said- where do I start?

It has been an amazing, stressful, happy, weepy, blessed first week with a new baby around here. We are sooo in love with Cam and can't get enough. I had an audience (the entire family) for his first big tarry poop and his first sponge bath. The kids are pretty fascinated by their new brother and I probably could have saved a ton of money on baby gear as he's always in someone's arms. Breastfeeding has gone as well as could be expected for someone whose boobs haven't nursed a baby in almost 8 years. Sore and cracked. But, I suffer through and it's getting better. He is getting enough to eat for sure and has already gained 1/4 inch and only lost 1/2 a pound per his first doctor's appointment. So that is great news. I however have been a bit weepy since coming down off a hormone high. I have either been head over heels in love with my family or overwhelmed or tired so I cry here and there. But, I have amazing friends and family who have kept me sane. I do have a bit of cabin fever and the blahs as well, probably from lack of sunshine. I really want to get out but it's too soon and I am TERRIFIED of swine flu, colds, etc. So, I am staying put and trying to keep my chin up. A shower does wonders as does brushing my teeth. We have also been spoiled rotten by our friends who have kept us fed. We have had casseroles, lasagna, spaghetti, tacos, and DESSERTS! It's amazing! We have saved a ton of time and $$ which are in short supply with such a big family. I get teary eyed just thinking of how blessed we are. Really, who knew people really liked us and wanted to help? I am stunned. So far each day is pretty routine- Jon and the kids go off to work and school and the baby and I go back to bed! We spend our days nursing, diapering, resting, and I watch TV and do minor chores here and there. I spend a huge portion of each day kissing Camden and rubbing his velvety head and soft feet. I love the way he smells and my most favorite of all is how he quiets down at the sound of my voice and the way he "roots" for a nipple on my face. He is so sweet and of course- PERFECT! I seriously can't believe having another baby was a question all these years. Yes, it is hard having 5 kids and juggling all that comes with our life but when I look at their faces it is so worth it!

sleeping, look at those hands...

sleeping some more

wide awake at bedtime

same as above, and yes he sleeps with us

he slid way down in his boppy

first bath

I promise...

2009-09-17T00:43:00.002-05:00

to blog soon. I have been a little bit busy. I have several cute pics to post and things I must say- but I'm tired and my picture program is being ghetto. And, I'm tired. Camden has been in a deep sleep for over an hour and I did laundry instead of sleeping. I am sure I'll be reminded of what a dumb decision that was at around 3 am. I am just so tired. Plus, I have two homecoming mums to make. I need an assistant or a nanny or anyone. Thank goodness for the kindness of friends and family. Without whom the smoothness of this past week would not have been possible. I am a very blessed and extremely lucky person. I can't thank Heavenly Father enough for all of the blessings he has given me and my family. I will try my hardest to blog in the morning, or I might nap... we'll see!

He's Here!!

2009-09-10T16:19:00.002-05:00

Mr. Camden McCay Myers made his grand entrance into the world on September 10, 2009 at 4:11 am. He weighed 8lbs 6oz and was 22 inches long. He is a chunk with reddish blonde hair and is already a breastfeeding pro! We are in LOVE! I will get on in the next few days and post details about the birth.

A whole lotta nuthin'

2009-09-08T21:17:00.004-05:00

Well, I am still pregnant. Crap! Even though I am scared to death of childbirth and newborns in general, I truly am ready to be through with pregnancy- forever! Things have just been SO WEIRD around here. I have had several signs that labor is imminent and was sure he was coming the last two nights. Then, things would stop out of nowhere. I have literally woken up Monday and Tuesday, gotten chores done, kids off to school, and rested all day long thinking any minute my contractions and other symptoms* (TMI, but at the bottom of the post if you're curious) would pick up steam. It has been very frustrating to say the least. I haven't been cooking at all. We have just been doing bachelor food (mac-n-cheese, nachos, raviolis, Ramen, etc) just because- A) I'm exhausted and B) I can't think straight long enough to prepare a meal. I even went so far as to have my mom stay the night last night because I was POSITIVE he was coming. She is now back home, bags packed waiting for my call. I have my sweet friend Erin (my kid's second mom practically) at my beck and call helping me out as well. I feel like everyone around me is holding their breath and I feel like I am disappointing everyone or like The Lady Who Cried Labor. So, once again my bags are by the door, we had a quick easy dinner, and I am freshly bathed in my pj's waiting once more for labor. I sure hope I can start a good labor pattern before 7:30am and I can avoid an induction tomorrow morning. Plus, maybe baby boy can pick his own cool birth date without me prompting him. Once again, Thanks So Much for all the sweet phone calls, texts, and Facebook messages. I am sure y'all are just as ready as I am for him to come. Then, I can get busy blogging about sore nipples, yellow poop, and how tired I am.

*mucus plug and bloody show*

waiting, waiting and more waiting.....

2009-09-05T13:30:00.006-05:00

I am sitting here on my bed, with a laptop, outfitted in PJ's. And, I am waiting- for a contraction, my water to break, or a baby to land on my bed. I have cleaned the entire house many times over. The clothes the kids slept in are already washed and folded. There is a ton of food in the house and still I wait. For some reason I just knew I was gonna go into labor last night, because I had a hair appointment today I guess? And, obviously he isn't here yet. I had a rough night of sleep, my back was killing me and my dog barked ALL NIGHT LONG. So, I cancelled my hair appointment. The thought of driving to Mansfield when I would rather be resting didn't sound very appealing at all. Plus, I figured when he's a few weeks old a fresh color and cut would do wonders after many sleepless nights, poopy diapers, spit up in the hair, and day after day of sweats and bad breath. Honestly who is gonna notice my hair-do when I am busy pushing a baby out anyway?
Anyway- as of now I have an induction scheduled Wednesday (9-9-09) if I choose to be induced or I haven't gone into labor by then. I am very leery of inductions- I have been induced twice and when your baby isn't ready to come out, it' a long brutal process. So, I am gonna try anything and everything to get labor going this weekend. And, if not I will cancel the induction if I chicken out. The 9-9-09 birthday would be cool, but I really want him to be born on his watch not mine. I am just surprised that he hasn't come yet. I haven't really been resting at all. I have cleaned and walked and pushed myself physically every day for the last two weeks and still he's staying put. He has dropped so low and I have so much pressure down below that for the first time in 5 pregnancies- I WADDLE!
So, that's the state of things. I am just waiting. Today I am alternating between the couch, my bed, housework, the bathroom, and the fridge. And, I am crossing my fingers....

In a nutty shell...

2009-09-03T23:11:00.007-05:00

Today I:

got up at 6
went to the OB at 10
got numb/frostbite butt sitting "naked from the waist down" waiting on OB, I am no more dilated or effaced than I was last week... CRAP!
had lunch at home by myself at 12:30
surfed the net til 2
picked Hayden up from school early because I can
napped from 3:15 til 5 (love having older kids, they made their own snack and started homework!)
did a spit shine on entire house and cooked and ate dinner from 5:30 til 7:30
forgot that it was Meet the Teacher at the middle school between bites of meatloaf, oops!
folded three baskets of laundry and read with Hayden
put Hayden and Chloe to bed at 9
haven't left the couch or computer since, except to pee 7 times
fixing to go to bed, I might brush my teeth....

Tomorrow I'm:

getting the kids off to school from 6 til 8
sitting my fat butt on the couch at 8:01 and I am only getting up to eat and potty

**I am not leaving the couch til 2 when I have to get ready to get Hayden. This is because I am SO DONE being pregnant and I am tired. And, because I can. Tomorrow after school- who knows? It depends on if I can tap into some energy of kind. Doubtful. Did I mention I'm done? I have never been more glad to see Friday coming and I might be able to muster a cartwheel because it's a three day weekend. Maybe. Watch me go into labor on Labor Day, how fitting.

P.S. please pray for rain, this will make my Couch Potato Fest all the more fun!

A birth story

2009-08-31T05:02:00.015-05:00

**NO I have not had him yet** I am delirious from lack of sleep and decided to blog about when I had Hayden.

Uggh! I have been up for an hour- it's now 5:03 am. Crap! Today was the day I was gonna run several last minute errands and tackle a few little chores. I have forbidden this baby from coming out til I finish this list. Now it looks as if I am gonna spend a good part of my day napping. Hopefully I can get to my list before bedtime tonight. And, before you say anything- yes I know it's not a big deal if I don't finish my list. But, I really want to cross everything off. I just have this urgency that I can't describe.
I had the same thing going on when I went into labor with Hayden:

I was on week two of my maternity leave, it was a Monday and I knew I had to get this list done so I could relax and wait on him to come. I had planned the day out: OB for my check-up, take Chloe to gymnastics, have lunch with Kelli and Amy, after which I would hit Burlington Coat Factory for coats (an ice storm was coming) and the grocery store so we wouldn't starve during said ice storm. I had a feeling the contractions I had been having that morning were the real deal and when I got to the doctor I had dilated to a 3 and I had been a 2 the week before. So, the urgency to get my list done kicked into hyper drive. I ran by the house to grab Chloe for her class (Jon had the day off and was working on his portion of the list) and told Jon to go ahead and shower so we could run our errands as I was pretty sure I would be having the baby that day. I planned to come back by to get him after Chloe was finished. I called Kelli and Amy and told them lunch was off- I was afraid to eat just in case... Almost immediately after Chloe's class began my contractions started to be more frequent and intense. I sat and tried to watch her, all the while timing my contractions and trying to remain calm. At this point they were about 10 minutes apart. However, I thought I could still get all my errands done. I went home when Chloe finished and got Jon and off we went. First stop: the coat store. I made it from the parking lot to the first rack of coats and my contractions intensified quick- they were now coming every 7 minutes or so. And me? I kept shopping. Breathing through them and leaning on the cart, because it felt better that way. I somehow grabbed coats and gloves for the kids and even managed to stop in home decor to grab a birthday gift!
I knew standing and contracting in the checkout line that the grocery store was not gonna happen. I called my doctor who told me to head to the hospital. But, we had to grab Chan and Hunter from school first. Honestly I am not sure what was more painful- waiting on Jon to come back to the car with the boys or driving through construction and school zones while contracting.... Put it this way- it was a reeaal long drive.
During my entire pregnancy I had grand plans (I have them now as well) to have all the kids there to witness the birth. I would have freshly painted toenails, soft smooth legs and bikini line, full makeup, etc. There would be calming music playing and friends stopping by while I sat in bed all epidural-ed and pain free, just waiting until I was told to push. HA! I quickly figured out I was NOT in charge. Not only was I not near as dilated as I had hoped- but my labor stalled when they stuck me in bed. At this point it was about 3 in the afternoon and little did I know it was gonna be a long night. Most of my labor from that point on was a blur.... I remember my mom showing up, my kids driving me INSANE, Kelli and Amy coming to retrieve the kiddos and get them McDonald's, several friends showing up to see the baby, and me in tears because he wasn't coming fast enough and my epidural was NOT working. I remember being so frustrated and so done with ever having more kids. At that point if Jon even got near me- he would have lost his manhood....
Finally around 8 it was time to push. Which I did. I pushed until I couldn't push anymore. Over two and a half hours passed and no baby. My doctor (who had been off playing video games in the doctor's lounge) came in and told me if the baby wasn't born by 11- I was gonna have a c-section. I had been vomiting and needing oxygen and I think he wanted out more than I wanted him out. Really though, I think my doctor wanted to go home. I know I did.... I flat out refused to be cut open. So, I said a prayer- for strength and courage and had them turn off my epidural. All it was doing was making my legs numb, while I writhed in pain. (This is a result of scar tissue in my back and the very reason I am not sure I can have an epidural this go round.) I had little to no pain relief throughout the entire labor. Let me tell you- that prayer and my faith worked wonders, I felt like Xena the Warrior Princess or something. I pushed him out 16 minutes later! I was so relieved! And, as my mother in law will tell you my exact words were: "I am done- no more babies ever." I have never been so glad as I was then- he was beautiful and perfect and fat- 8lbs 3 oz, my biggest baby ever and a big shock after Chloe who weighed in at 6lbs 14 oz. It was a rough labor, I can't stress that enough. My memory has failed me about all the details but I do know most of my anxiety about labor is because with Hayden it was sooo bad.
So, I sit here this morning with freshly painted toes, smooth legs, and groceries. I only have a few little things on my list... and I am having some little contractions. I am almost positive it's not the real deal. It can't be, I have a list to finish first.

the kiddos, Hayden was about 18 hours old and look Chloe has on her new coat

Pig's Feet

2009-08-29T19:39:00.011-05:00

So, I am willing for the sake of my blog to show y'all a picture of my cankles. In four pregnancies I have NEVER had swollen anything. I can wear my rings, high heels, etc. Well, my rings still fit but high heels are gonna have to wait awhile. Yes, I know I have a bunion and yes I desperately needed a pedicure when the pic with the black toenails was taken. I got one last night but unfortunately it did nothing for the swelling. If anything it's worse. Without further ado, my feet:

Thursday evening

Saturday afternoon

Back to the OB she went.....

2009-08-27T17:41:00.006-05:00

So, today I went in for another check-up. Seriously- bad experience... First I was late and was courteous enough to call. That idiotic receptionist tried to tell me if I was more than 15 minutes late he would have to reschedule! Really? What about all the times he made me wait over an hour?? I managed to slip in a whopping 4 minutes late! Miraculously, I was called back within 5 minutes. Where I was promptly weighed, I am up 1.5 more pounds, wowza! The minute I got in the room I told my nurse exactly what I thought of the receptionist, it rhymes with witch. Then she told me my Group B Strep test was positive. Which made my blood pressure climb to 140/90 and my feet to swell like balloons! Ok, my feet were already swollen but still! They did get bigger, much bigger. I am sensing lots of rubber flip flop days in my future. Anyway, back to the point- Of course I was sitting there panicking about the strep test because I had Googled it the other day and it scared the bejeezus out of me! That didn't help matters one bit! Then that silly nurse asked me if I wanted to be checked for dilation and effacement!! I said to her: "of course I do, don't all doctors check at 36 weeks on?" And she acted like I was WEIRD! That got me even hotter! Anyway, he finally came in and molested my cervix with his big fat fingers. Which was horribly painful and not at all something I care to do again. I think I may tell her no next week when she asks if I want to be checked. She might wet her freaking scrubs. Anyway... to make a long blog post short- I am dilated 1 to 2 centimeters and starting to efface a TINY bit. Which sounds promising if you are going to give birth to a Lee press on nail... As of now, I am on strict doctor's orders to rest with a vat of bon-bons and some cheesy television. Which I fully plan on obeying ;)

P.S. After I calmed down a bit I had my blood pressure checked again and it was down to 122/76 so that's good!

Wondering-

2009-08-25T12:57:00.002-05:00

how the kids are handling the first day of school, particularly Chloe. Today was her first day of middle school. I am really hoping Hunter helped her out today... it's nice that they are in the same school again this year.

if I can get all of my last minute nesting done before baby.

how many more chocolate chip muffins I can eat before I get sick to my stomach, hmmm... also, if the chocolate I got on my white shirt will come out.

when I am gonna go into labor, how it will start, how long it will take, and if I can manage without the epidural.

what the baby looks like, if I really want to name him what we have discussed, and if he has hair.

if I will find the mental energy to load the very few pictures I took of the first day back to school.

if my kids realize for the first time in their entire lives that I forgot to put notes in their lunches- it's been a tradition since they started kindergarten. I feel terrible about forgetting....

if Chloe is gonna have a good year. Middle school is when girls become Mean Girls and I can't stand the thought of ANYONE being mean to my Chloe girl.

if Jon will surprise me with the fluffy chocolate brown glider rocker I have been begging for.

if Swine Flu is gonna be as bad as they are saying- kinda scary... supposedly flu season starts in a few weeks. Yikes!

if I can get my last minute errands run before baby.

and lastly- if anyone is reading this and if so are you bored yet?

on going to the OB....

2009-08-20T10:51:00.004-05:00

With pregnancy comes frequent trips to the OB, as we all know. The first visit is fun- you're having a BABY! And, if you're lucky you get a sonogram picture of your little peanut. The next several visits are pretty uneventful, not counting the monthly heartbeat check. For me it's an opportunity to wear a cute maternity outfit and some makeup and if I'm real lucky- my husband will take me to lunch afterwards. It's the visits that come from 36 weeks on that STINK! And, today was no exception. Even though my doctor should have technically checked my "progress" last week- he chose to put it off.... not sure why? I had already gotten up at the butt crack of dawn (8:00) yesterday and after sitting there for 30 minutes I was sent home because he had an emergency c-section to attend to. I was so peeved. So, I head back today and am relieved to be the first patient. It's when I get to the ladies room to leave a urine sample that I realize that my underwear are on inside out... lovely. I get on the scale- where I am up 2 pounds after losing 2 the week before, even lovelier. The nurse takes me to a room and says "well, he's not here yet so"... I pretty much tuned her out at that point because I am afraid I might curse at her and then I hear- "he's probably not gonna check your progress today anyway." Ugghhh, are you freaking serious?! I shaved for nothing?! But, she does tell me he is gonna do a swab for Group B strep- which requires me to be naked anyway. And I am thinking- dude, just check me please! He finally shows up and dang it if he doesn't want to chit chat! About his son's recent fender bender, school clothes, tax free shopping and on and on, before you know it an hour has passed! FINALLY he tells me he will check me in addition to the swab and heartbeat- YES! (On a sidenote- I can't believe I am excited to have a stranger examine my girly bits). He leaves and I quick drop trou, making sure to right the wrong undies for when I slip them back on. And, then I kid you not I hear his office door shut where he proceeds to have a meeting with his office manager! FOR almost 30 WHOLE MINUTES! And, I sit there fuming. Wanting to tiptoe my naked butt to the magazine rack that's 3 feet away for an outdated Family Circle to read, or wishing my phone was closer so I could text someone- anyone! But, the fear of being caught keeps me from getting off the table. So, I sit there and wonder where all those spider veins came from and how my recently pedicured feet got so dry and is my butt hanging out and... TWENTY SEVEN minutes later he comes back in and lickety split does everything while talking about football season for his boys- with really cold hands I might add. It literally took him 3 whole minutes to tell me- I AM NOT DILATED. I leave the office crampy and cranky. When I see that I have 15 minutes to get breakfast before Chick-Fil-A stops serving I speed through the parking lot with my debit card in hand. And, not only do I get served an old stringy chicken biscuit- the woman gives me the wrong drink AND drops my debit card UNDER my van! Oh man, what a morning! I knew at that point if I didn't get home and take a nap that my day was gonna continue to go down the tubes. I am a pessimist that way... I am pleased to report that after a 3 hour nap I am chipper and alert and ready to hit the mall for school clothes. Wow, did I just say that?

WARNING: Labor Inducer

2009-08-16T01:41:00.004-05:00

Here's a picture of Jon's truck.

It's an '04 Harley Davidson edition F-250. Or in another words, more effective than Pitocin. Seriously in about three weeks if the baby still hasn't made an appearance, I am going cruising in this bad boy. Because the last two times I have driven it I have had some pretty intense Braxton Hicks contractions. It might be partly due to the crappy asphalt roads out here in the boonies, but the combination of the two are sure to get labor started. Definitely I won't be driving it again for at least 21 days. He is NOT ALLOWED to be born til after Labor Day.

yet even more pics of baby related stuff.....

2009-08-16T01:02:00.014-05:00

So, as I said before I am working on the baby's room in spurts. Other than two adorable wall hangings/goodies that are being made by Amy and Sarah, I am done with my part- Labor & Delivery not included. I also FINALLY received my CUTE diaper bag that I ordered off of Etsy, so of course I have to show that off too. So far my favorite things in there are the pics that Chloe and Hayden painted! Anyway- here are some more pics of the goings on in the nursery.
As soon as I get the other stuff and hang it, I will post AGAIN... I can't help myself! I am in love with this room!

number cards (these are above the closet)

number cards

number cards

Chloe's tree she painted for baby (this is above the crib)

Hayden's masterpiece for baby (this is also above the crib)

DOTS!

diaper bag/purse

close up of crib quilt

quilt again...

Trying to be Positive Patsy when I feel like Negative Nancy.....

2009-08-09T14:23:00.003-05:00

Ok, so first of all I feel like I should say thanks and sorry at the same time. I feel like I complain ALOT on here and I am grateful for the sweet comments when I do. I guess it's easier to type my feelings as opposed to writing them in a journal. And, I am pretty sure the people around me are tired of hearing me complain, so my internet "audience" gets to hear me rant.
That being said, this last month of pregnancy is doing a number on me. I am sooo stressed it's pathetic. I have ALOT of school shopping left to do, baby stuff that needs my attention, and 4 bored kids. And, to top it all off- Chandler (my oldest child of broken bones, torn ligaments, staph infection fame) has injured himself YET AGAIN...! This time he dislocated his elbow, which doesn't seem that bad to me but what do I know? He had to be taken to the ER where they put him under to put the elbow back in place and is now in a sling for who knows how long and will miss about 6 weeks of his Senior year of Varsity football. Already he is driving me NUTS! Bored, hungry, etc. every 15 minutes. He is on Vicodin ES which has made him pretty much unable to help me by watching the kids so I can get school shopping and planning done. I have been stuck at home for 3 days and I guess I might be having a hormonal woe is me cabin fever kind of thing going on.
Plus, I am FREAKING out worse than ever about childbirth. I made the mistake of reading about unmedicated natural childbirth and I am absolutely scared to DEATH!! I am assuming the fact that I know he has to come out somehow is making me antsy. Really, do they still put you under and deliver the baby? That way I can wake up and he's here! I don't really want to do that, but as each day ticks by I am getting more and more anxious. Not even chocolate is helping.... I think I am quite possibly driving Jon bonkers as well. And, he is the most laid back person I know. In addition to all of that I can't wake up before 11 each morning and I am taking naps right after dinner each evening. Will things ever be back to normal? Really though, what is normal? Anyway, thanks yet again for listening. I am off to take a mid-afternoon bubble bath. Wish me luck and stuff.

Picture OVERLOAD: nesting, re-decorating, and misc...

2009-08-07T19:02:00.027-05:00

Ok, so I am finally able to post some pics of all the SUPER HARD STRESSFUL work I've been doing around the house. I am pretty much done with everyone's rooms but the baby's which is ironic because I had this brilliant idea to play musical bedrooms because he was coming.... I have more big plans and cute ideas for the nursery and hope to get started tomorrow, wish me luck!! Anyway- just a short rundown: Hayden's room used to be Chloe's and was pink/cottage green Shabby Chic decor. The baby's room used to be Chan's and was brown and blue stripes, Chloe's room used to be Hunter and Hayden's and was blue, orange, and brown surf. The big boy's room was our home theatre/game room (which was our garage when we moved in) and was purple, black, red, with black carpet, home theatre decor, etc. And, lastly the bathroom was tropical blue surf overload. I'm afraid a little thing called $$ or lack of has put my living room/kitchen plans on hold for awhile but I am pleased with the looks of things so far. All right now- give me some honest feedback.

Big Boy's room

books and stuff

TV watching seats

close-up of bed

room from doorway

picture in kid's bathroom (reminds kids to conserve water- ha, ha, ha...)

mirror and cool towels

shower curtain in kid's bathroom which inpsired everything else

Hayden's book nook

Hayden's room- decorations, TV with Zumiez stickers (skater must have....)

more decor, decals, TV

Hayden's bed (I chose comforter, he picked paint)

Chloe's dresser and chair

dresser (Jon refinished this, it was cottage green with rose knobs)

shelves full of goodies, love the curtains

the bed and new duvet (she chose decor and colors based on the duvet)

crib full of sheets, bumper, etc. (waiting til the last possible minute because the cat has already tried to claim ownership...)

drawerful of goodies

closet (trying to organize...)

bouncer/stuffed animals

crib (again waiting til the last minute to get ready because the cat thinks this is his room...)

lonely shelves (trying to decide what to put on it)

shelves of cute stuff

changing table

Baby Showers!

2009-08-06T23:17:00.013-05:00

Me and the baby (and Jon) were recently the guests of honor at not one but TWO baby showers. They were thrown by my sweet sister Kelli and two sweet friends, Erin and Sarah. One was for my friends from Grand Prairie and Arlington and one was for our couple friends. And, these ladies went all out. We're not just talking cake and punch here. We're talking FOOD, FAVORS, AWESOME CAKE, DECORATIONS! And, these sneaky ladies not only planned and hosted a great party- they gave me gifts too. Which, they will be getting spanked for.... as soon as I have some energy to do so. I specifically told them no gifts if they hosted the shower, but they didn't listen. I had a great time at both showers and I think Jon had a pretty swell time as well, he did pretty good for his first ever baby shower! I am just so thankful for my friends and family, that I was all mushy both days. I was able to score enough clothes, blankets, diapers, toys, sheets, and all manner of fun things that baby boy is spoiled already! I was also able to get a ton of gift cards that I am gonna put towards some of my bigger items. Thanks again for a great time! I am a lucky girl to have such an amazing support system. I have but a few photos, I was too busy eating and talking to take very many. But, I know for sure Miss Sarah has some great ones over at her blog. She was able to get pics of all the cute decorations. Check it out here. I may be able to scam some from Erin sometime too, we'll see.

P.S. I do believe I am in the home stretch....!

about to open our loot at couple's shower (gotta love my hips, they were made for birthing babies or so it appears)

cutting the cake (aww, just like our wedding day)

kiss, kiss (they made us)

me and Miss Chloe at my girls only soiree

Thirty Six-

2009-08-03T01:30:00.011-05:00

days left to be pregnant

days left to pee every 15 minutes

rolls of toilet paper

doses of Pepcid AC

times to be allowed to nap and not feel guilty

days to have fattening cravings

days to watch my baby kick and squirm in my belly

days where it's ok to have a fat belly

days to avoid the litter box

days to be a human oven during a Texas summer

days to have thick luxurious hair

days to wear maternity undies

days to not have to worry about birth control

more days of morning sickness (crossing fingers)

more foot rubs

more days to make my kids to more chores than normal

more times I can use pregnancy as an excuse for anything

and, BONUS- I'll be 36 on my next birthday!

Look out, I guess I don't know how to behave.....

2009-07-28T17:17:00.003-05:00

Well, apparently I am a crappy person and someone forgot to tell me. Which is ironic, because I thought I was a people pleaser. Honestly I am kind of getting tired of the title. But, not enough to change my ways, yet... I would like to know at what age is it ok to be who you are without getting your ass handed to you on a platter? I am not confrontational nor am I a "sweep everything under the rug" kind of chick either. However, if I am in a mood and am confronted about something- watch out. I guess my point is: can someone please tell me how I, as a female human being, am supposed to behave on a daily basis. Because, I guess I didn't get that memo.... I try really hard to be a good friend, daughter, sister, in law, neighbor, aunt etc. But, I guess I'm not as good as I thought. I have been confronted and or snapped at by 3 different people since Saturday alone, for seemingly innocent things. I won't go into detail or name names. I just want to know if it's possible to be fitted with a muzzle and some puppet strings as well as have a master puppeteer show me how I'm supposed to act? I am 35 years old, and left high school back in the 90's where it belongs. I wish people would stop and think before they decide to get mad at me or gossip behind my back. Here I am, weeks away from delivering MY FIFTH child, I am living in a cluttered war zone of a house, my teenage sons are smart mouths, my husband is being a typical man, and I have enough hormones raging through my body for a small pharmaceutical company. You would think that certain people would understand and cut me a little slack. I am TRYING.

Meet B.O.B

2009-07-22T02:33:00.004-05:00

Today I-

2009-07-16T23:52:00.006-05:00

had new carpet installed in all of our bedrooms- finally!

got to see my mom, my sister Kelli, her kiddos, and some sweet baby kitties. Family rocks!

sorta saw Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince... between potty breaks and dozing off, I saw about 30 minutes total. Cost me $7.50 too!

went pee pee in the potty about 20 times, half of those being in public restrooms. The Chili's in Grand Prairie by far had the nastiest bathroom of all. Flush people!

thoroughly enjoyed being with all 4 of my kids all the day long. They were being turds as usual, but I loved being with them- it's been awhile since Chan and Hunter are always with friends.

bought 11 gallons of paint, took FOREVER.... But, we now have paint for all the bedrooms, which feels awesome!

moved the crib into the future nursery, so surreal. Not only is there a baby in my tummy, but pretty soon he'll be sleeping in this house!

didn't eat a single meal at home which just feels wrong. I had 1/2 of an order of movie nachos, 3 Southwest eggrolls from Chili's, and a grilled chicken wrap from Sonic. I feel yuck and I swear I heard my body ask for an apple or a carrot. Jon managed to move the mattresses out of our kitchen so I can reach the frig for tomorrow's meals. Whew!

didn't get a nap or Facebook time, which hasn't happened once in the last 6 months. I think I am preparing myself for when baby comes and I am at his mercy.

had a tornado named Jon Myers come through my house. Not really, but everything we own was moved into our kitchen, living room, and Jon's trailer. My house looks scary... can't wait til I can redecorate.

left the house at 9:30 am and didn't get home until 10:30 pm. I can pretty much guarantee I am gonna be swollen like crazy, for who knows how long.... I hope not, because I have plans non stop for the next two weeks. I have appointments to go to, baby showers to attend, and of course sleeping and eating.

sold my surf bathroom decor, thanks Mary! Hope y'all enjoy it!

am hoping to get a much deserved bubble bath with a trashy magazine (Us Weekly). Won't someone please get the books, high heels, and pillows out of my tub- anyone?

She's hit a brick wall...

2009-07-15T02:54:00.007-05:00

**DISCLAIMER- I am about to rant. You've been warned.

Ok, so I have reached the I'm so over being pregnant stage. Is it ever gonna end? I can't believe I'm saying that... Just because feeling a baby move inside of you is an amazing yet indescribable feeling. There are other neat things too, but that is the absolute best. However, I am ready to get this baby boy out of my body. Which is bittersweet, because this is the absolute last time I will be pregnant. That being said- I am pretty sure I had a mini nervous breakdown yesterday. I got too hot and went too long without eating and I started having that scary feeling where you can't take a good deep breath. I guess alot of it started Saturday at about 4am when he decided he liked the head down position best, his feet got so tangled up in my rib cage that I was awakened out of a deep sleep. Now, he won't stay out of my ribs and it hurts! I feel like I can't breathe either. He is also squishing my stomach which is making my ulcer and nausea the worst it's ever been. I know I have said that alot, but really it's horrendous. I can't sleep- at least not normal hours. I feel incredibly guilty for not being more fun and involved with the kids so I am constantly apologizing and buying them goodies and lots of ice cream. Nothing fits. I look like crap- all the time. And, I am sooo tired of people acting shocked when I tell them I am pregnant. Apparently I am so morbidly obese I just look like a wide load/lard ass who went back to the buffet one too many times. And, I am scared to death of labor. I know he has to come out but I am terribly frightened. Then, when he comes out, will I remember what to do? Can I do this? Will I be able to manage the baby and my other kids? Will I have any time for me? How will we afford a baby? I guess I should also mention that other than starting the kid's bathroom I am nowhere near closer to getting any bedrooms done and time is ticking fast, which is a whole new can of worms. Really, what I am trying to say is I am losing my mind... I really need some serious encouragement. I need to be pumped up so I can make it emotionally and physically for the remainder of this pregnancy. And, I am not talking about a new purse or a pedicure either. C'mon- help a girl out... I need soothing calming words of encouragement.

P.S. I think Jon should read this. Maybe then he would understand. Ha- who am I kidding?

Surf's Up...

2009-07-13T16:14:00.004-05:00

for sale that is. I am re-doing the kid's bathroom as we speak and have several cool items for sale-cheap. I prefer to sell everything as a whole so I can get it outta my house!

Pottery Barn surf shower curtain
Pottery Barn sign- says To the Beach and it's BIG
Got Crabs? sign
Beware of Sharks sign
Beach Bungalow sign
fishnet
crab hook (for towels/bathrobe)
candles (Hawaiian shirt, 3 coconuts, starfish)
jar candle (triple layer tropical scents)
surfboard nightlight
beach umbrella toothbrush holder
Welcome to the Beach sign
lots of leis
plastic lobster, starfish, seahorse and crab
seashells
tiki hut plastic plate
flip flop plastic plate
Hawaiian shirt plastic plate
beach bucket trash can (super heavy duty and CUTE!)
surfboard rug (has seen better days)

*I am selling all of this for $65* I believe it's a good deal, simply because the Pottery Barn stuff alone wasn't cheap. Let me know via comments if you are interested. I can take a picture too, I just need to wash the rug and wipe down the other stuff first.

Are we in hell and somebody forgot to tell me?

2009-07-11T14:37:00.008-05:00

Holy Freaking Cow- it's so hot I am about to die. I am sweating in places no decent lady should sweat from...Seriously I was born and raised in Texas and swore I would never leave, but lately I find myself dreaming about moving to a cooler place. I have never liked the heat much, as long as I can be near swimming pools and cold drinks- but this year is the worst Summer I think I have ever experienced. I am a heat stroke/sun poisoning kind of girl. Meaning if I don't have the above mentioned swimming pool-cold drink combo I can't be outdoors. And forget about me not having A/C, not gonna happen. Can't happen. I am sure the fact that I am a human oven making a cute little bun right now is making matters worse. Put it this way- Summer in Texas is not at all pleasant. It doesn't bother Jon a bit, which I can't understand. He can't stand the cold and shivers when it's below 78 in the house... whatever dude. On a day I do leave the house before dusk I apply deodorant 2 to 3 times and stand in front of two fans just to cool down from getting ready, which is nuts because I keep our thermostat at 74. Blow drying my hair is AWFUL, like I feel like I need a shower afterwards. The minute I step into my clothes- here comes more sweat and getting in the car is like stepping into an oven. Last week the temp in my car was 110 at 11 o'clock in the morning!! We don't swim in our pool- the water is a warm 95 degrees most days. I feel like I am cheating my kids out of their Summer- because of my intolerance to oven like temps. Normally we do Six Flags and Hurricane Harbor at least once with several movie trips thrown in and other miscellaneous stuff here and there. But, this year we have done 1 movie, 1 trip to the Art Barn, and 2 pool parties. Wow! Thank goodness Chandler stays occupied with his friends and the other 3 hit the BMX track with Jon or they would literally rarely ever leave or have any fun. Thank goodness for books, board games, and the ever so important internet and TV. And to top it all off- I have spent a small fortune on icees, slurpees, ice cream, and bottled water. I really wish I was a wealthy woman- we would spend Summers somewhere gorgeous and tropical where the temps don't go above 85 and winters somewhere white and beautiful. Then we would hop in our private jet and visit friends and family in Texas whenever we pleased. Sounds fun right? Now, I am off to daydream about cooler climates while I sip some frosty goodness under two fans and I am gonna pretend the weather dude was joking when he said it won't go below 100 all week long....

Awkward!

2009-07-09T13:47:00.016-05:00

So, there's this website- Awkward Family Photos. I have looked at it or similar ones before, and man are they ever funny. So, in the spirit of awkward pics I decided to add a few of my own just for fun. Now, I am sure I have many more I could put on but these are already scanned on my computer. Enjoy. Thanks for the blogging idea Jesse! And mom, don't be mad I am not making fun just having fun!

me and my brother Erik with Santa

me and my sisters Kelli and Amy. This was taken the day before my brother went on his mission, the brick wall is my neighbor's house

me, my mom, and Kelli

poster children for McDonald's

one of many birthdays

don't ask.....

me and my high school BFF- Stephen

a random Christmas

He's got the cutest little baby face....

2009-07-09T13:03:00.005-05:00

I went yesterday for my 3D sonogram. Of course the baby was being a little stubborn. He was awake but was hanging out in one position. He had his arm tucked around both legs and and his legs were right in his face. We tried everything to get him to move... but nothing. The sono technician did manage to get a few face shots. And if you were wondering- yes he is definitely still a boy! Chloe is still skeptical- even though his boy parts were larger than life on a projector screen. He opened one eye at one point as if to see what all the fuss was about. Personally I am amazed at technology- that you can see what your baby looks like before they make their big appearance. I remember with all the other kids just having a grainy ultrasound pic and being completely surprised at delivery. Especially with Hunter who hid the goods through FIVE sonograms. Anyway- he looks like my other kiddos and looks perfectly adorable to me. Oh yeah- although I have no photo to show for it, he definitely has my thighs. The first thing we saw when she started the scan was two FAT thighs, they already look ripe for squeezing!

what are you looking at? See his little eye open?

P.S. just a little FYI- I have officially gained back every single pound I lost, plus 2... And, I had a little scare with my blood pressure last week (it was reading 135/85 which is high for me) and this week was much better 125/72. Turns out I was ALOT anxious and a little dehydrated.

on my mind...

2009-07-07T22:39:00.003-05:00

My poor neglected blog. I really really want to post more but I can't. I even have pictures I could put on here. But I'm LAZY! I attempted to change my header and background today but I chickened out. I kid myself that lots of people read this and care if I post or not and for the handful of you that do- I am sooo sorry. I am gonna get it together eventually....

My head hurts so bad right now I feel like it's going to explode. Pretty much all I can take is Tylenol and it does nothing for me. I think I would feel worlds better if Chloe would stop being a turd and yelling at me and bouncing a ball and if Chandler would stop playing his guitar. Help me...

I wish someone could get Jon to understand a pregnant woman's need to nest. He just will not get busy and work on the Honey Do list I gave him. We have so much to do before I feel like my nest is properly feathered and I am getting zero cooperation. If anyone has a husband to spare- send him over. Our poor house is in such disarray and I am going to lose my mind if we don't get the ball rolling soon. Which might explain the headache. Hmmm...

Is it hot enough for ya? OMG- I feel like I may melt multiple times a day. It is SO BAD! I have lived in Texas my whole life and have been very pregnant through two other summers and never ever remember it being this bad. Remember when I said I was gonna live in my pool? Well, I lied. I have been swimming a whopping two times. It is just not worth it and the water is like a bathtub it is so warm. Really my favorite thing to do is be lazy in the A/C. I feel sorry for my kids, I know they are so bored and I feel really guilty. I am gonna take them somewhere fun this week as long as it involves cold beverages and air conditioning. Any ideas?

Tomorrow I am gonna splurge and get a 3D ultrasound. Yes, I know I just had one but not 3D! I am sooo excited. I am taking Jon and all the kids and I know they will be fascinated and surprised. I wanted one so bad with Hayden and they were fairly new and super expensive, so I figured I would splurge on one. Thanks for the coupon Shawna!

And, last but not least: I am currently obsessed with two items. One is a Hawaiian Punch Lemon Berry Icee. I got one at Target and I can't stop thinking about it. The other is the Sonic cherry lime-aid chiller. So Good. As a matter of fact, I may have to get one now since Sonic is still open...

It's Gettin' Hot in Here....

2009-06-28T02:56:00.004-05:00

Oh man, we're melting... Our air went out this evening. Luckily we made it through the heat of the day before it decided to die. Jon and the boys went to the Fort Worth Stockyards to watch this and Chloe and I were gonna get Chinese and rent a movie. Not long after the boys left I noticed the house was kinda warm. Normally I keep the thermostat at 74 and Jon likes it at 76. Well, I am pregnant and ALWAYS hot so I win. When I went to check things out I noticed it was 76 in the house, I instantly start accusing Jon (under my breath of course) of trying to burn me up. I adjust it to 74 and go about my evening. After 30 minutes it was still hot. So, I go outside and the compressor is silent. Not good. The temperature in our house starts to rise by one degree every 15 minutes. Pretty soon it's at 82 and I start to cry. What? I am a baby and I admit it. I can do without cable, the internet, and even my cell phone. But, take away my air conditioning and I go downhill- quick. Luckily I remember we own a decent sized room a/c unit that my father in law had borrowed when his air went out. So, I call Jon and relate the bad news- pretty soon my doorbell is ringing and it's my fairy god father in law with our air conditioner. Chloe and I went about our evening as planned. We splurged and got PF Changs to go and let me tell ya the air in my van was heavenly. I almost considered sleeping in there... We drank our weight in ice water, sponged ourselves with wet wash cloths and dipped our feet in the pool. I even took a cold bath WITH a fan on me the entire time. Now, we are trying to get comfy and it ain't easy. It's 3 in the morning and no one is asleep, we're just too hot. Even with the portable a/c. Chandler opted to stay with a friend and we have the other three kiddos and the cat hunkered down on air mattresses and pallets in our room. We currently have 2 oscillating fans, the ceiling fan and the a/c running. We're down to a balmy 80 degrees. Cross your fingers the repairman shows up and that it's an affordable fix.

Sonogram Pics

2009-06-23T20:16:00.006-05:00

Today I went in for a 7 month sonogram. Mainly because the old sonogram technician at my doctor's office spent 2 minutes total on my 20 week scan. Which they tried to charge me $350 for! And, to top it all off- she wasn't able to get a good look at his face. So, I complained to my doctor and he wiped the charge off of my bill and scheduled today's longer more in depth sono, with the new and improved technician- for free. The little stinker hid his face for the entire time until she had me lay on my side and boom there he was. I immediately got tears in my eyes, I guess because seeing his little sweet face made it seem more real. As if the tap dancing on my bladder and kicking me in the ribs weren't indicators enough.... I must have asked her a hundred times if he looked ok and she assured me everything was wonderful. Of course I am skeptical and will remain so until he's born. If that ever happens. Seriously his head looks so big I am more afraid than ever! Afraid he won't fit! I need some reassurance here. Does his head (in the profile shot) look abnormally large or am I being a worrywart?

baby face

an arm and a foot

profile

P.S. Jon insists that he has ginormous lips and a nose piercing already.