Dear Santa,

Ok, Santa so I realize that my letter is really late this year. As a matter of fact you may be down the street for all I know... but, I am writing you anyway! I think I have been an ok girl this year, maybe I'm on the "Between Naughty and Nice List"? For sure I have held my tongue MANY times and I always let my husband eat and shower before me even when I'm starving and stinky and Camden is crying. I have also kept my road rage in check. Those are good things right? Not to mention I have kept breastfeeding Camden even though one of my nipples is permanently deformed. There are so many good things I could mention, but since you know EVERYTHING I will save myself the trouble. I am not gonna ask for much, Former Girl Scout's Honor. And really since I got a new Iphone(!!!) I really don't need alot.
So without further delay I would like:

A ginormous bottle of Nair and the courage to actually use it. I haven't been able to shave much lately and I am afraid I am gonna tear my sheets or hurt someone with all of the stubble.

The little Asian man down at the pedicure place to rub my feet every night. My bunions have been killing me lately and Jon isn't as good at foot rubs as the little dude down at the nail salon.

Larger towels. I managed to flash the Direct TV guy yesterday. I screamed. He stared. Not pretty. I am surprised he didn't run away. The least he could have done was offer me a free movie or something.

A pair of contact lenses that can resist sliding down the drain. Or maybe a pair a day for the entire year. Maybe if they hadn't slid down the drain yesterday I would have seen the satellite man before I walked past him naked.

Cheesecake in all flavors from the Cheesecake Factory. I am trying to make my butt look more shapely and I am thinking cheesecake might help.

A giant bib. Camden spits up ALOT and every single time I am without protection, he gets me. He is super fast and I am never ready it seems... and I get barfed on alot. A bib would be great!

A better alarm clock. We oversleep frequently and I am tired of rushing every single morning. Not fun.

For Hayden to be more adventurous in the food department. The kid has eaten the same 15 foods for years and I am sick of them, surely he is too...

For Chloe to stop missing the bus. She misses it about 3 days per week. So. Freaking. Annoying. Especially since Hunter goes to the same school as her and he manages to catch the bus. If I get the above mentioned alarm clock that might help a bunch.

I would also really like it alot if Chandler got a JOB. He really needs a job. The kid will be 18 in 3 short months! Preferably not at a food place but instead a place where he can get a discount (Target!).

For Hunter to cut his dang hair! He reminds me of Shaggy or Johnny Depp's portrayal of Willy Wonka. Johnny is a dollface but his Willy Wonka hairdo is fugly. Bobs aren't cute on boys and the last chick who cut Hunter's hair messed it up bad....

Anway, I think that's about it. If you could fulfill all of my Christmas wishes that would be groovy. If not I'll be ok. Really I have lived with/without the stuff I have asked for and I am ok. And, I have an Iphone so I'll survive!

**Merry Christmas Everyone!