On my Chan-Man

I have been wanting to sit down and blog about Chandler for quite some time, but haven't really had a ton of time to devote to the kind of post I wanted to do. I am determined to get this finished before dawn... Way back in March, Chandler celebrated his 18th birthday. Which, is a huge milestone for so many reasons: he is legally considered an adult now, he can vote, he's old enough to work at Target (score), etc etc. But, the biggest milestone for me personally was that I never imagined I could raise a kid, let alone get one to adulthood. And yes, I know he is barely an adult.

I am not sure how many of you guys that read this know that Chandler has a different father, whom he has never met and that I met his step-dad Jon (who is HIS DAD, regardless of genetics) when he was almost 3. Yes, I was a "single" mom although I did live with my sisters and my parents. I was responsible for his care as much as I physically, emotionally, and financially could- whenever I could. I mainly relied on backup from my sisters because I didn't want my parents to think I couldn't handle a kid, my kid. You see, I had only been 17 for a few short months whenever I got pregnant. I was a statistic- an unwed, pregnant teenager. I was also nearly 16 weeks along before I even found out I was expecting. I strongly suspected it, but was in massive denial and didn't really know where or whom to turn to. It wasn't until I finished up a session at Summer school that I had a few of my friends drive me to a free clinic in Dallas. I pretty much knew I was pregnant, I just needed confirmation. As if the sore breasts, nausea, and terrible exhaustion weren't a big enough clue. So silly, but I remember giving a fake name in case the nurse at the clinic decided to tattle on me. Once I found out I kept it between me, my sisters, and my friends who took me to the clinic. I had always known that I wasn't meant to be your typical young adult, I had felt it since I was a little girl. I just didn't know what my future held- but I was about to find out, quick! I managed to keep my secret for a few weeks and it wasn't until a huge fight with my mom did the cat jump out of the bag. I was terrified of what my dad would say/think. Instead, I think for the first time in several years a light seemed to shine on our family. Little did I know what joy, hope, and happiness he would bring to all of us. Which is what brings me to this post- Chandler's 18th birthday is such a huge milestone because he came into this world 2 weeks after I turned 18. I could go on and on about my life thus far with the Chanster, but I won't. Simply put, yes there were and will continue to be hard days. But, for every hard moment there have been a thousand more awesome ones. I will say that I was headed down the wrong path, doing all kinds of foolish crap and I 100% believe that Chandler saved my life and came into this world when I and my family needed it most. He is such a cool, awesome, smart, funny, quirky kid and I am alot proud and truly honored that he picked me to be his mommy.

gettin' his hair did


me (19) and Chan (1)


Senior night at his school (back in October)


me and Chan and Cam on his 18th birthday (sorta blurry)