Sunday, March 2, 2008
It Ain't Easy Growing Old...
For some reason my birthday this year is kicking my butt. It took me a whole year to become 34, it's not like it happened over night. Yet for some reason, hearing myself say 34 instead of 33 almost made me sick. I don't know what is wrong with me. The other numbers that I've been so far have never bugged me, but this one has. And, it's not just the number. It's the changes in my skin, the gray hairs that have crept up. It's being surrounded by youth. I mean, the number is bigger and the brain and heart are wiser, but I really still feel 20 years old. I can't even fathom how someone who is in their 60's or even 80's feels. They were young and at their peak once too, and to see the face that looks back at them in the mirror must be shocking. I always knew I would take aging hard, but man this is rough. I have been an emotional basket case this week. And it sucks. My kids must think I am nuts. I guess maybe I should go down to the Senior Center and volunteer or something. I mean I'm not that old am I? I need to just chill out and be grateful that I am alive. I can be such a brat. It doesn't help that the world and Hollywood in particular are so hard on women to be perfect all the time. I'll climb off my soapbox now. And, I'll eventually accept the fact that my age is gonna keep moving forward.
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11 comments:
No, you are not old!!! Haven't you heard that 30 is the new 20....40 is the new 30 and so on! But, I do understand how you feel. I'm turning 32 next month and for some reason that is a hard one for me. I think it's because we aren't just ending our 20's, but we are into our 30's now. Does that make sense? But even though I have more wrinkles and alot of gray hair, I have more wisdom, more patience and I'm finally at a point in my life where I'm not trying to hurry up and get somewhere. I just want to sit back and enjoy where I am. Besides, that is what hair color is for;) If I can only find something to hide my wrinkles;)
You know, I know I have no place to talk being the youngest of this bunch of ladies, but I have been talking to my Dad (who is going to be 60 next year, and my cousin Rene who is going to be 50 THIS year) that after a certain age, age is just a number. That you are only as old (or as young) as you feel. Don't let 34 slow you down, b/c you and everyone that knows you , knows that you are young at heart! A super cool mom with 4 great kids!
Okay, this is totally cracking me up ( no offense). Just the comments and everything. I'm sorry, but being in your thirties, or even forties is nowhere near old. I just don't see it that way. I think a woman is more beautiful, more alive, and more creative (in whatever area) when they are in their thirties and forties. I still feel like a kid sometimes, but I mostly feel so glad to be in my thirties because I feel I'm finally coming into my own. Embrace this wonderful age and embrace this time. You are as old as you allow yourself to be.
amen, Kelli Ü
Everyone feels/sees things differently. I am glad it's amusing. I would feel funny if my blog didn't bring some chuckles... Yes, I know I don't have one foot in the grave. Maybe I am just a dumb ass. It bothers me. My son is gonna graduate soon. My babies are no longer babies. I feel useless, my self esteem is at it's lowest ever. I was never bothered by my age until now. Sure, if I was only 30 or so and just starting my family it wouldn't be a big deal. Who knows why people experience things differently? And, I never said I felt 34, I still feel young but I'm not. I agree that women are more beautiful and alive as they age, but it still sucks. I have talked to tons of women my age and older who all had a hard time dealing with 33 and 34, then they were ok until they got close to 40 then it started again. Youth is a hard thing to lose no matter how much you've accomplished or how much you know. I am being bombarded with all kinds of things that are bringing me down lately, and I am sure it's because I am trying to make some positive changes. I have poured my heart out to more than one person lately, so those of you that have listened maybe didn't totally understand.
I do understand all that you are talking about. I would feel so sad/lost, too if my kids were all in school and I was struggling with what to do. What's amusing to me, and I don't mean it in a mean way, is everyone talking about 34 like it's 84. That really is what it sounds like.
And just so ya'll know: if I could figure out why my emotions were so out of whack I would totally fix it or try to change it.
I wasn't saying that 34 is 84, I was saying that Ashley shouldn't feel that way! That age is nothing, and she is NOT old! Age is just a number. :)
and your current mood is cracking me up...
and your current mood is cracking me up...
:B
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