I've lost that blogging feeling...

I really miss my blog so so much. It bums me out that I no longer have time for it. And, I've tried- I really have. I even gloated in my last post that I was gonna get back into blogging full force... It seems since then that life got even more hectic, if that's even possible. I've also gotten out of the habit. Plus, I honestly feel as if I have nothing good or funny or interesting to say, dangit. I mean, my older kids are to the point where they are gone with friends or texting or yelling at me so there's no blog material there. Hayden still says some dang funny crap and does cute stuff but when you're out of the habit of blogging it just gets tucked into your memory instead of on the computer. I'm not gonna say I'm taking a break- wouldn't wanna cause anyone to roll their eyes at me! But, I will say that I would really like to pick it back up again I just don't know if I'll be able to. Honestly, my hats off to those of you who find time to update and make me smile! Each morning I hit the floor running and work away at laundry and little bits of exercise and chores. Plus, I spend a ton of time playing and cuddling with Camden. We try and venture out to the park or shopping or lunch with friends a few times a week. But really my days are jam packed and there are only so many hours in a day. However, in the Spirit of Ashley I am gonna do A LIST!

Reasons Why I Never Blog Anymore

1) I do at least 3 loads of laundry a day which takes a ton of time and sucks royally...

2) My entire family is sharing one computer (6 people x 1 computer = no blogging)

3) I have a 7 month old baby who is already pulling up, crawling, and generally being a big handful!

4) I have been preparing a big home cooked meal every night and it takes me at least 2 hours between the baby and preparation not to mention cleanup and whatnot. Ugh! Remind me why family dinner is important again?!

5) I am cheating on my blog with Facebook. It's express blogging! Much faster and easier and like 10 times the comments :)

6) I've been spending a little bit of time exercising, which is much better for my butt than the desk chair.

7) I am having a love affair with my iPhone and this nifty game called Words with Friends. It's superb!

8) I've lost the knack! I 100% think I am way too boring for blogging words... Really, I don't know what to blog about anymore

9) I let myself get out of the habit, unfortunately.

10) If I'm gonna take time to do something for myself it's not gonna be on the computer. I'm gonna read a book or get a pedicure or something.

11) Having a much desired baby come into an already hectic, nutty, household has kicked my butt- but good! I have said that before but I don't think anyone realizes unless you have a kid who is crying, nursing, getting into crap or whining to be held. Plus, his 30 minute naps unless he's on his mom's tittay are also a factor. If I ever get pregnant again... so help me Lord.

12) My stomach problems. I finally had an ultrasound today and hope it shows what's wrong. If not I have to go in for an endoscopy. There are days when I have a million things planned but if my tummy is acting up I barely leave the couch or get to eat. Case in point- I recently lost 7 pounds in 5 days.

I think that pretty much sums it up. I reallyreallyreally love my blog and I love to read all of my friend's blogs but there just aren't enough hours in the day. Keep checking mine and I'll keep checking yours ;) I may just surprise you one day and update this bad boy. I love all of y'all to bits and I am so so grateful for the friendships, memories, and support that have been born since I started blogging. Muah!

a recent "project"- one current pic of each kiddo (wait, how did I have time to do that??)

Not so fast....

Yeah, so note to self: no more pep talks! I think I jinxed myself something AWFUL after my last post... Yesterday was terrible, and that's a major understatement! I'm having that "I have to be Superwoman" thing going on. I get frustrated and overwhelmed way too easy. And while I did feel like a Rockstar when I wrote my last post, I am now back down on Earth. I have got to learn to RELAX! Any tips? I know there are good days and bad days, and I know it will get better and eventually I will have an empty nest. However, what the hell am I supposed to do in the meantime?

Umbilicus Frustratus...

Camden's belly button/umbilical cord stump has been giving me fits. Probably because I have been so anxious to try out his new bathtub... He went for his 2 week checkup on Friday (he has gained 10oz and 1/2 an inch) and his pediatrician told me his cord would likely stay attached for several more weeks. She said he had a flat cord, meaning it was attached straight and flat across his belly button and that no air was getting to it which helps it dry out and eventually fall off. It had been oozing and bleeding a tiny bit here and there but nothing bad. Back when all my other kids were born you put alcohol on the cord to speed the drying up and falling off of the cord. Apparently that is no longer standard, you just keep the diaper folded down and continue sponge bathing so it doesn't get wet. I was told by the doctor that if it hadn't fallen off by the time he's one month old that I should bring him in and they would use a silver nitrate stick to burn it off. Lovely. Well, apparently all of her picking, poking and prodding sped the "healing process" right on up... That night around 10 or so he got fussy- BAD. He would scream as if he was in pain but only sporadically. I thought it was gas and that we were in for a long night. And, boy were we. He cried like he was hurting all night long and he would draw his legs up, much like when they have gas pains. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was hurting him. I changed him by nightlight a few times and saw teeny spots of pus on his onesie but no more than I had previously. He didn't fall into a deep sleep until around 7 am and that was only after I swaddled him up like a burrito. At 11 Chloe came in and woke me up and as I was getting ready for my day I had her unwrap him so he would wake up to eat. That is when she asked me in a panic if I had seen his belly button.... what I saw freaked me out beyond belief. I had never seen so much blood and pus on a newborn baby in my life. Plus, his belly button was hard, hot, and swollen. So, in a panic I called Erin and had her rush over- since she's down the street, and, she too was in shock and had never seen anything like it either. I immediately called the nurse's line at my pediatrician's office and they advised me to clean it as often as possible with alcohol and they had me draw a line around the redness on his tummy. If the redness went past the line I drew he would have to go to the ER. Thankfully by the next morning the swelling, redness and leftover stump were gone! Whew, I was so afraid it was infected and that he was gonna need antibiotics at such a young age not to mention being in the ER with all the other sickies. Man, kids sure do keep you on your toes...

Camden's swollen belly button (yes my ink line was way off)


his onesie soaked in blood, pus and laundry detergent

Shooting the breeze...

Just a little chatter for the heck of it.

I tried the new KFC grilled chicken. Not bad just not good. I kept thinking I was eating roasted chicken like Boston Market, but it had this weird grilled flavor. I probably won't get it again.

The baby's bedding came in the mail yesterday. OH MY GOSH! It is soooo adorable, more so than the pictures online could ever show. And, the quality is amazing. It is seeming more and more real that a baby is coming. I am NERVOUS! But, once I get a car seat/stroller system, I am ready, sorta... He just needs to "bake" for 80 more days. Wow, that's not long!

I am seriously developing a weird "crush" on the pedicure man. They must have taught him right in pedicure school. Put it this way- I think my eyes rolled back in my head when he rubbed my feet tonight. He could definitely give Jon a few pointers when it comes to foot rubs. I offered him the boy's new bedroom if he would move in and be there when I'm in labor. He turned me down...

Hayden cracks me up. Just this week alone I almost blacked both of his eyes, just because a cute kid is punchable in my opinion. The other day Hunter was lifting his arm to show me his sunburn and Hayden said "ooh Hunter yuck. You have HAIR under your armpits, gross!" And then this little conversation: "Mom, who made everything in the world?" Me: "God did sweetie." "No he didn't, because everything we have says Made in China."

Speaking of Hayden. Apparently his flossing and brushing need to be supervised. He has been complaining of a toothache so we headed to the dentist yesterday and he has 3 small cavities in ONE tooth. Grand total to fix it: $823.52!

Add that to the $1300 fine I got for the time my dogs escaped, the $160 ticket I just got, my $4200 hospital bill, and $5000 for a new a/c unit and I may need to borrow some money. Only kidding. But, yikes! I am more than a little stressed...

Speaking of stress- the constant nausea is getting OLD. Can it be possible that I am gonna have morning sickness my entire pregnancy? It's sure looking that way. I am nauseous all the time and it stinks. Really. Nothing I have tried works. Any advice? I have read about vitamin B6 and Unisom together and then there's Zofran but it's expensive. The phenergan does nothing. Any tips would be much appreciated.

And, that's all for now. I really want to do a giveaway for my 600th post (which I surpassed 9 posts ago) but I'm lazy. Soon, I promise...Anyway, have a great weekend!

More things I've learned today...

After 17 years of being a mom, it finally hit me like a ton of bricks: my children really can't clean their rooms very well, they can lose things like shoes rather easily, they will watch you looking for their shoes as if they were at the movies, and they don't listen EVER! Oh, and my "favorite", they truly can't do much without me. Neither can the man I married...

I have been married to Jon for 13 years and he can't find things AT ALL either, he doesn't listen worth squat, and the most annoying: the manner in which he puts things in the refrigerator. Case in point, last night we had burgers and hot dogs for dinner. He oh so sweetly helped me put things away and this morning when I opened the fridge it looked like an explosion had gone off. Condiments wherever they would fit (instead of the door where I thought most people kept condiments), the cheese slices sitting on a plate of leftovers, a baggie of lettuce sitting on a pitcher of juice... I mean, aren't those nifty little drawers there for a reason? Really this made getting lunches packed a nightmare! I should have insisted that the kids only had one option for lunches, the lunch line. Who was I to ever allow them to bring a homemade lunch?

Whew! Put it this way- this morning was emotionally and physically exhausting! I was pulled in more directions than I even knew possible. I even got everyone up early and Chloe still missed her bus, for the 2nd time this week and it's only Tuesday!! If my family would only listen to me they would realize how much smoother things would be if we all worked together. To say I am ready for this school year to be over would be putting it mildly. I am tired of packing lunches, school uniforms, getting up early, getting yelled at by pubescent little turds, etc etc. I am sooo ready to sleep in every day. I long for the lazy days of Summer: ice cream, swimming, sundresses, naps, cookouts, and watermelon just to name a few. Breath Ashley. There are only 49 days of school left.

Ashley's not very busy, calm before the storm day...

Today was my last moment of peace before the real craziness begins. I have spent the last week and a half looking for clothes for Christmas cards and endless decorating. So far today I have:

napped! you would too if you were up til 3, up again at 6:45 to get your kids ready for school, and then were left with a quiet house and a warm bed calling your name. I will not tell how long I napped...

then, while indulging in a Lean Cuisine and a cold Coke Zero, I spent 2 hours doing Christmas cards. All I need to do now is slip a family picture into each one and Voila!

made cookies. I only ate one teeny little one. They're not too fancy, just a little festive. Chocolate Chip with red and green swirly icing. Seriously, it was all I could muster. I am saving my creativity for my first ever gingerbread house! I am excited!

I made a Christmas list for me! In case Jon decides to indulge me this year. He always gets me gifts, let's just say I know why the term "it's the thought that counts" was invented.

chores: laundry, sweeping, vacuuming, bed making, and air freshener spraying. All to give off the effect that I slaved all day. When in reality I "spruced" and "fluffed"!

Now, it's 3:00 and Hayden is here enjoying my cookies. Tonight Chloe and Hunter have hair appointments at the fancy salon, they are too high maintenance for Cool Cuts... Basically after this I have about 10 days to get pictures made, shop, volunteer at school parties, bake, eat, sleep, breath and be Super-Mom. Every year I spend so much time decorating and stressing over Christmas clothes and school parties that I end up shopping when it's crazy-nutty out there. Not sure why I punish myself this way? I still haven't learned my lesson I guess? I was talking to a lady the other day (yes, a perfect stranger.) She was mentioning that she had 3 kids and never seemed to have a moment's peace. And, I agree. Back when the kids were younger I felt like I would never catch up until they were older and that I was doomed to be forever stressed. Little did I know that the stress and craziness don't get better. You get more busy and more overwhelmed. Being a mom to older kids is infinitely harder, in my opinion. Ask any mom of older kiddos, it's just a different kind of busy. Back when they were younger there were days at a time when I wouldn't leave the house. Forget cute clothes and makeup. My days consisted of laundry, meal prep, baths, endless breast feeding, snot wiping, toy pick-up, fight referee, nurse, etc. Fast forward several years into the future and a day like today is something I thoroughly enjoy. It makes all the teenage drama, taxi driving, school projects, 2 kids smack dab in the middle of puberty (add in all of the above except breastfeeding) etc. etc. almost bearable. Ok, so I am done jabbering. I need to change out of my pj's and brush my teeth... and get busy on Christmas plans- again.


today's after school snack that will be long gone before dessert

I am THAT girl

The flustered, rushed, always late, disorganized one. I try, I really do. But, I am a mess. I am never on time, I procrastinate getting ready. Which means I have to drive like a maniac every time I go some somewhere. I am forgetful too. And, then there's my purse. Which y'all know from reading on here before, is a cluttered, black hole. I really don't know what to do about this. You'd think I would learn my lesson by now, but no. Take today for example. I had a Dr. appointment and of course I was late, which meant I was last to be seen. So, a quick appointment took two hours. Now, I have a mile long to do list that I have this overwhelming need to get done before bed. And, I am running out of time. Uggghhh.... But, instead of worry about things I can't control, I am taking my mom to dinner for her birthday. So there. I'll just stay up way too late and once again get no sleep. Oh, the life of being one of those girls.

You can't make this stuff up

So- I am sitting at the computer, putting off going to bed. Entranced by the internet, I hear a beep. It sounded like the dryer, so I head to the laundry room to see what's up. The washer was empty and I had just put a load of jeans in the dryer. Nothing looks amiss, so I get back on the computer. And, I hear another beep. I head BACK in the laundry room and still nothing. I check the cell phones, thinking maybe some idiot is awake crank-texting us. Nothing. I sit back at the computer and the beep starts up again. And, this time it doesn't stop. It's our smoke detectors!! So, I run screaming in the bedrooms for the kids to wake up, the smoke alarms are going off. I run to our game room and yell at Jon to get up, (he's asleep on the couch) and then to the living room to get Hayden off of the other couch. (He's sleeping on the couch with a bucket because of a bad tummy ache.) I get everyone outside in various states of sleep and undress. We stand in the yard while Jon checks things out. The alarms proceed to go off and on for about 10 minutes. We check the A/C, the attic, the stove, all around in and out- sniffing the air. I grab the phone to call 911, I mean I trust Jon, but I am nervous and want the experts. Jon said no way, the neighbors would freak and there's nothing that he can see. So far so good. Everything seems fine. It's been about 20 minutes and nothing. We think it was the giant load of jeans in the dryer. Because the smoke alarms near that side of the house are the one's that went off. So, we have turned it off for tonight. They tell you that you can stuff a ton of clothes in the new fancy washers and dryers, but forget to mention that it might be unsafe. Now, my kids are WIRED and it's a school night...

Oh what a day I am having!!

Chloe's binder is gone. Into thin air. She lost it, who knows where? It was one of the expensive binders that zips, and it was full of school supplies. About $25 bucks worth. The kicker: no Lost and Found at school... Back to Office Depot we go.

Chloe and Hayden have so much homework today. Chloe had 90 math problems and Hayden has reading to do and flashcards and spelling words to study. Needless to say, I am hitting the Advil pretty hard. I completely suck at math. I max out at 5th grade math. Which is sad. Oh well, I have some talents somewhere. Need to find those.
Oh yeah, they also sent home a fundraiser packet today. Yippee! They lasted til the third week of school. Impressive.

My dogs drank beer today. And, not just any beer. Beer that has been in my Cowboy Cooler for 2 and a half months. Not sure why Jon never threw it out? Maybe he's getting a heads up on the Science Fair? Anyway, a bottle broke and the dogs went to town. Let's just say they sneezed and gagged as they continued to lap it up. They are now resting, hopefully they're not hung over. I am pretty sure Coco winked at me... Oh, and they chewed on the broken shards of glass.

My frig is on the fritz again! For like the millionth time this year. I finally bit the bullet and called Sears. Jon has been doing the temporary fix thing (blow drying the frozen coils) for several months. But, momma is tired of this crap. So, Sears will be here between 8 and 5. Nice large window there. I guarantee you they come at 1, which is the same time the missionaries will be here. Let's just hope the repairman wears the right size pants and a belt. Not really in the mood to see "Plumber's, but I'm a Refrigerator Repairman Crack". Unless, he's cute. Ok gag, not really.

And, last but surely not least: My cat keeps barfing. ALOT. His tummy can't tolerate canned or people food. Or too many treats. Mental note to self: talk to kids about spoling and overfeeding cat.

Hi, my name is Ashley...

and I have a problem. A clothes problem! I have washed, folded, hung up, put away, and packed clothes since 6:30 and I have no more space. I still have 4 more loads to wash and fold. Not to mention the largest pile of socks on earth. It's amazing how much your sock hamper can grow when you do laundry! I now have a hamper and a basket full of socks and I still have to match them all up. The closets are packed, no one's drawers will close and I am almost out of hangers. I have no idea how I am gonna fit school uniforms into our limited drawer and closet space. For years I have complained about not enough room for clothes, and I finally realized that we have plenty of room, we just have too many clothes. I have packed 8 outfits and 2 sets of p.j's for each person, so I thought for sure that we would have some empty drawers and closets. But no, it's worse. Now I know why I am always behind on laundry, no where to put it. When we get home from Utah, I am doing a major clothes purge. Did I mention that we had a garage sale in April and that I gave away 4 garbage bags of clothes just today? Wow, I am just in shock.
P.S. packing for 6 people is harder than I ever imagined. If we ever get to go on our dream Hawaiian or Disney World vacation, we are bringing bathing suits and nothing else.... and I am not even kidding!

I need someone's 2 cents worth

Ok, here's the deal. Hunter has a buddy named Will. They met this past school year. At first they were content to talk at school, at lunch, after school etc. Well, the latter part of the school year they started hanging out ALL THE TIME. On Wednesdays I would let Hunter go home with Will and hang out. That was fine until I found out sometimes they were left alone, which isn't that big of a deal. Except once, on a school night around 9:15 Hunter still wasn't home and he wouldn't answer his phone. I went over there and knocked on the door and Will's mom said Hunter was at another kid's house. Which I don't think is a good idea, it was agreed he would go to their house. She shouldn't have let him leave her house to go somewhere else. I do let Hunter spend the night with them, but never thought it was a big deal. What mom wouldn't let her high strung, hormonal, borderline A.D.D. son spend the night with a friend? There have also been issues with money. Will hasn't exactly made it a secret that he is "rich". Well, his siblings are grown and both his mom and stepdad work, not to mention regular child support payments... Hunter isn't stupid, he has heard Jon and I discuss medical bills and this past Christmas was kinda lean compared to other years. I heard him comment to Will once that we were poor. That threw me off, since Hunter does have a cell phone, a brand new X-box 360, expensive race bike, etc. I think he took the money thing too far. Or, I may have teased that we were broke and he took it too literal. One of my issues with Will and his mom is that she has given Hunter nice shirts; new and used and the icing on the cake was when she bought him a $150 skateboard. Well, lately it's been constant asking to spend the night, Hunter sneaking over there when I am not home, and he even calls them for a ride when he does want to go over or when he needs to come home. Saturday she called my phone and asked if he could stay over!!! And, today may have been the straw that broke the camel's back: I called Hunter home to try on some new shorts I bought for our trip, I noticed he got home quick. And, sure enough when I looked outside, the mom's car drove off. Well, not 5 minutes after he had been here his phone rang. And, this is what I heard Will say; "are you done? It's been 5 minutes, we drove around." Is all this weird or am I crazy?

P.S. and before anyone asks, yes Hunter likes girls. I am not thinking it's that! I am just curious as to what the fascination is on Hunter, Will, and the mom's part? Is it no other kids are there? A cute girl in the neighborhood? What?

Busy Bee

Hey All!!
I have been busy planning Chloe's birthday party. We are doing a 50's style sock hop. Nothing exciting is going on and I am sure no one wants to see a picture of me shopping. Although, I do have an interesting tidbit. I have been having a hard time finding 50's stuff, especially clothes. I had gone into a party store and stopped at Claire's. No one at either place had heard of sock hops or cat eye glasses. I must be older than I realize?? Anywho... Chloe's birthday is actually on July 24th. Which in the Mormon world, is a major holiday. Pioneer Day, the day the Mormons arrived in Salt Lake City. So, in Utah it's a state holiday. Chloe would like to move there, go figure?

Speaking of Utah... I can't wait to get there. 12 more days. I am just so happy to be able to see my family. I am hoping and praying everything goes off without a hitch. From the planning and the packing to the finances and the looooong drive. I am in desperate need of luggage, a portable auto DVD player, and any ideas to occupy the kids to make the drive as smooth and un-boring as possible. So far I found a way to get some luggage, here. (Nowadays, spending $35 bucks is a breeze. We spent that on ingredients for one dinner!) But, if ANYONE has anything I can borrow or any advice I would be eternally grateful. Cross your fingers that the party, the trip, the baby shower I have planned in August for Amy, and another trip to child support court don't drive me B*A*N*A*N*A*S!!

WTF ! ? !

Today I worked up the courage to speak to Chandler's "bio-dad". We were at the beginning of what I was hoping would be a decent conversation about life, the past week's events, etc. when my other line rings. I look at the caller i.d. see that it says the high school is calling and decide they can leave a message. I figured it was Chandler's chemistry teacher calling. He was in danger of failing her class because of a few important papers he didn't get turned in because he was having surgery. She had already emailed me the good news that he had passed, so I thought maybe she wanted to make sure I knew. Not two seconds later my cell phone rings, and I am thinking she must be super proud he passed and really needs to make sure I know it. So, with my cordless in one hand and my cell in the other, I answer the phone with: "hi, Mrs. So and So, I got your email, that's great news. I am on a super important phone call, can I get back to you?" And this is what was screamed in my ear: "NO, THIS IS NOT MRS. SO AND SO. THIS IS MS. ALLEN. YOU NEED TO COME GET YOUR SON IMMEDIATELY. HE HAS BEEN SUSPENDED FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE YEAR. HE NEEDS TO LEAVE CAMPUS IMMEDIATELY. HE CAUSED AN UPROAR IN THE CAFETERIA. HE CAN COME NEXT WEEK TO TAKE HIS FINAL EXAMS!" And, I was like umm okay... WTF was that?
So, I try and end the call with "bio-dad" as quick as humanly possible, and get dressed so I can go pick up my juvenile-never been in trouble- before delinquent. When I get there he walks out the doors to greet me, and he knows I am pissed. I storm in there to talk to her or anyone of authority and of course they are too busy, but I can call them later if I want to. Excuse me? So, I calmly grab Chan and we head to get Hayden. So, here's what happened: There was a fist fight in one corner of the cafeteria. In the opposite corner there sits Chan and his friends. You've seen photos. They bring brown bag lunches, play guitar, and they all wear glasses. Kids whose idea of fun is to spin on the Merry-go-Round til they barf. Hardly dangerous children. They are goofing off, having fun, playing with their empty soda bottles. Just being kids who are fixing to be set free for 3 whole months. Rock on! Well, MS. ALLEN sees them acting goofy and sees Chan squeeze his empty Mountain Dew bottle til the lid pops off and shoots up in the air. She loses it. She orders him out of his seat straight to the office. They proceed to walk to the office where she tells him he could have started a bigger fight, where he could have caused chaos, where he could be charged with disorderly conduct, and where she could have had him fined by the cops to the tune of $500. And, my personal fave, she said he could have "incited a riot." Is she f*c$!^g kidding me? He was stunned, as am I. That woman was pissed! I haven't been yelled at like that in years. Poor Chan, he really isn't a bad kid. However, she may have yelled at me like that because my darling son told her she was ridiculous and laughed the whole way to the office. So, Chan is starting Summer break early. And, Jon and I will be talking with MS. ALLEN tomorrow morning. Oh boy!

Lucky!

Today I had to take Chandler to the hospital for more pre-op tests. He is having the screws removed from his ankle on Monday. Anywhooo.... I am moseying along I-35 at a swift 70mph when I see my exit and I am nowhere near where I need to be. So, real quick I exit from the center lane. I feel only a smidge guilty about the folks I cut off. Ok, not really! That's why I have a 4x4 Suburban, move!! I briefly recall passing a U.S. Marshall way back, but don't give it another thought until I see him behind me at the light. Crap! Of course the moment I turn left he flashes his lights at me. At first I was hoping it was because I was cute... but then I am pissed, because I am thinking he saw my registration that expired 8 days ago. Thanks, Jon. Of course he scolds me for my crazy exit and "having no regard" for the other people I cut off. He never even looks at or mentions my registration. Whew! And, as soon as I apologize and tell him I am running late for my son's pre-op surgical appointment, he tells me to slow down and be careful. And then he lets me go. No ticket!! Yay! And, for the record, we have been tossing around the idea of trading in the Burb for a Minivan, don't gag... I know. But, being the professional procrastinators that we are, we waited until after the registration expired. And, because we feel like spending an extra $70, I mean really what's an extra $70 bucks when gas is only $3.54 a gallon?

Pinching Pennies

Lately all you hear about is the high cost of living. And, I think almost everyone I know is feeling the crunch. I try not to worry about it too much, but when it costs $97 to fill your gas tank, it's hard not to. It really seems as if the last month things have gone haywire with the economy. How are middle class people supposed to survive? Worse yet, the ones who fall below that level? After Hayden was born we were fortunate enough for me to be able to quit my job. There were even times when we felt invincible financially. A new house and new cars within 3 months of each other, all new furniture and home decor, a pool. Then a couple of surgeries happened. That was all it took to burst our materialistic bubble. Now, with an extra $75 added to the grocery bill each week and $1000 worth of gas each month for two big vehicles, material things are seeming more like a luxury than ever. I have noticed that even places like McDonald's and Chick-Fil-A have raised their prices. Capri Sun's now cost almost 3 bucks a box. You can't even buy generic store brand stuff, it's always sold out!! I am pretty sure that we are going to trade our Suburban for something smaller, and I am going to try and ride out the summer, but I will more than likely be looking for a job come August. I am a certified pharmacy tech, which pays pretty good. That means if I get a job that I'll be adding after school care to the budget. No biggie, but I have been home with my kids the last 6 & 1/2 years. So, just curious how are y'all saving? Any ideas to cope during these crazy times?

Naughty Puppy Dog

Since the weather has been so pretty, I have been letting Coco stay outside more during the day. I never in a million years dreamed she would eat my plants!! Now, I do not have a green thumb but I did manage to keep my banana plants alive this winter and they were starting to come back beautifully. In about 10 days time she completely obliterated my plants. I am so bummed. I am hoping to dig them out this weekend and replant them somewhere she can't get to them. Or I may leave them there and put some chicken wire around them. They seem to be pretty resilient so I am crossing my fingers that they will be reborn...

Here is a before picture. This is the only one I could find. Try and ignore the sweet little bunny and focus on the big beautiful plant in the background.


And... this is after!! Needless to say she has done some SERIOUS damage! It seems as if the minute something green or purple pops up from the center of the plant she eats it. If you look next to the basketball you can see one of the leaves!

It Ain't Easy Growing Old...

For some reason my birthday this year is kicking my butt. It took me a whole year to become 34, it's not like it happened over night. Yet for some reason, hearing myself say 34 instead of 33 almost made me sick. I don't know what is wrong with me. The other numbers that I've been so far have never bugged me, but this one has. And, it's not just the number. It's the changes in my skin, the gray hairs that have crept up. It's being surrounded by youth. I mean, the number is bigger and the brain and heart are wiser, but I really still feel 20 years old. I can't even fathom how someone who is in their 60's or even 80's feels. They were young and at their peak once too, and to see the face that looks back at them in the mirror must be shocking. I always knew I would take aging hard, but man this is rough. I have been an emotional basket case this week. And it sucks. My kids must think I am nuts. I guess maybe I should go down to the Senior Center and volunteer or something. I mean I'm not that old am I? I need to just chill out and be grateful that I am alive. I can be such a brat. It doesn't help that the world and Hollywood in particular are so hard on women to be perfect all the time. I'll climb off my soapbox now. And, I'll eventually accept the fact that my age is gonna keep moving forward.

One word:

FLU!

Help and Advice needed...STAT!

I don't care who you are, even if you're a stranger, help me!! I need all the advice I can get! Leave me a comment, you can do it anonymously. I need feedback.
Ok, so I have recently started a job as a nanny, daycare provider, babysitter, whatever you want to call it, and I think I may have made a mistake. Yes, I know in previous posts I have expressed how it's been fun, etc. However, I have done alot of soul searching today and as much as I want to help out my neighbor, I need me time as well. I had finally decided that 2008 was gonna be the year that I became true to myself and accomplished some goals that had been set years ago. All of my kids are in school now, and my life was essentially mine to to with whatever I wanted, a blank canvas so to speak. (Ok, between 8 and 2:30, but that's not the point). I have always been a people pleaser, and at times have found myself miserable because of it. I don't like people to be mad at me and I like to be helpful. I have a really hard time ever saying no. Which is the reason I said yes in the first place. I have been a mom since I was 18 years old. I essentially went from being a kid, to being a mom, to being a wife. More children quickly followed. As much as I have adored being with Emma, it has been really hard on me. I am getting up at 6:00, throwing on sweats or something similar, rushing around to get my kids out the door, and then bang here comes the baby. She takes 40 minutes to finish a bottle, and she eats every two hours. So, all day is feeding, diaper changes, and rocking her. She is really sweet and I adore babies, but I am drained. It would be different if she were mine. I could take her everywhere I wanted. I could let her cry if I needed to, without feeling bad about it. I could curl up in bed and let her nap with me, etc. When she finally goes home after 9 hours, I am too exhausted to cook, clean, or spend quality time with my own family. Yes, I know it's only been 3 days, but it's kinda wearing me down already. The only difference I see is that she is not mine, but it really is like having my own new baby. The not having time to eat, read a book, watch TV, go online, go shopping, even leaving the house, etc. It is taking up that much time. I really feel as if I need to be putting me and mine first, but instead I am too busy worrying about hurting someone's feelings or putting them out. So, you see I am very confused! What should I do? I was feeling so determined to make this year be the beginning of me living my best life ever, forever. Instead I feel like I am back at square one again. H-E-L-P!!

Livid!

I have been running around like crazy trying to get my Christmas shopping started and finished in like 3 days. Last night I did the majority of it and have maybe one more trip to Target and I am finished. Well, I was out until after 1 in the morning yesterday and everyone was asleep when I came home. Except Hunter. So, while I ran things into my closet (to store in Jon's shop later) I had Hunter take the trash cans to the curb. I ran so fast and carried so many bags, I didn't think he knew where it all went. Fast forward to today, and I am feeling awful. I am getting the beginnings of an upper respiratory infection or strep. So, I decided that after going to bed at 3, coughing all night, and being exhausted from shopping that I would take a nap. I had gotten up at 8 to feed Hayden and we had worked in a couple of puzzle books, so I was ready for a snooze. Now, while I will nap when the kids are in school, I rarely if ever sleep when they are home. Unless Jon is here. But, they are aged 6 to 15, so I figured being 10 feet away from the living room and a light sleeper things would be ok. Boy was I wrong! Hunter and Chloe sneaked past me sleeping and went straight to my closet!! Thankfully I woke up before Hayden snuck in there as well. They proceeded to peek into every bag, and now know the majority of the presents that they are getting! They no longer believe in Santa (they discovered the "secret" last year), but Hayden does. I was so shaky from sleep that I flew up out of bed and went ballistic! I am sure the neighbors heard me yelling. I was so mad and VERY disappointed! I was so afraid Hayden had seen his Santa gifts. But after the third degree and getting Jon and me on the phone with both of them, we straightened things out. Hayden luckily did not see his gifts. I immediately banished them to their rooms, only to be allowed out to eat and use the restroom. I made them write a letter apologizing for their behavior. I also have them on chore duty. They have made beds, swept, passed out Christmas goodies to the neighbors, loaded trashcans, cleaned their rooms, and vacuumed. I am fixing to send them into the boys bathroom to clean. Which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I am seriously considering purchasing little black bags full of charcoal briquets to place under the tree for them. However, I am not that mean. I just wish they could be more patient. And not worry so much about presents. So, needless to say, my blood pressure has risen to the roof today.