A birth story

**NO I have not had him yet** I am delirious from lack of sleep and decided to blog about when I had Hayden.

Uggh! I have been up for an hour- it's now 5:03 am. Crap! Today was the day I was gonna run several last minute errands and tackle a few little chores. I have forbidden this baby from coming out til I finish this list. Now it looks as if I am gonna spend a good part of my day napping. Hopefully I can get to my list before bedtime tonight. And, before you say anything- yes I know it's not a big deal if I don't finish my list. But, I really want to cross everything off. I just have this urgency that I can't describe.
I had the same thing going on when I went into labor with Hayden:

I was on week two of my maternity leave, it was a Monday and I knew I had to get this list done so I could relax and wait on him to come. I had planned the day out: OB for my check-up, take Chloe to gymnastics, have lunch with Kelli and Amy, after which I would hit Burlington Coat Factory for coats (an ice storm was coming) and the grocery store so we wouldn't starve during said ice storm. I had a feeling the contractions I had been having that morning were the real deal and when I got to the doctor I had dilated to a 3 and I had been a 2 the week before. So, the urgency to get my list done kicked into hyper drive. I ran by the house to grab Chloe for her class (Jon had the day off and was working on his portion of the list) and told Jon to go ahead and shower so we could run our errands as I was pretty sure I would be having the baby that day. I planned to come back by to get him after Chloe was finished. I called Kelli and Amy and told them lunch was off- I was afraid to eat just in case... Almost immediately after Chloe's class began my contractions started to be more frequent and intense. I sat and tried to watch her, all the while timing my contractions and trying to remain calm. At this point they were about 10 minutes apart. However, I thought I could still get all my errands done. I went home when Chloe finished and got Jon and off we went. First stop: the coat store. I made it from the parking lot to the first rack of coats and my contractions intensified quick- they were now coming every 7 minutes or so. And me? I kept shopping. Breathing through them and leaning on the cart, because it felt better that way. I somehow grabbed coats and gloves for the kids and even managed to stop in home decor to grab a birthday gift!
I knew standing and contracting in the checkout line that the grocery store was not gonna happen. I called my doctor who told me to head to the hospital. But, we had to grab Chan and Hunter from school first. Honestly I am not sure what was more painful- waiting on Jon to come back to the car with the boys or driving through construction and school zones while contracting.... Put it this way- it was a reeaal long drive.
During my entire pregnancy I had grand plans (I have them now as well) to have all the kids there to witness the birth. I would have freshly painted toenails, soft smooth legs and bikini line, full makeup, etc. There would be calming music playing and friends stopping by while I sat in bed all epidural-ed and pain free, just waiting until I was told to push. HA! I quickly figured out I was NOT in charge. Not only was I not near as dilated as I had hoped- but my labor stalled when they stuck me in bed. At this point it was about 3 in the afternoon and little did I know it was gonna be a long night. Most of my labor from that point on was a blur.... I remember my mom showing up, my kids driving me INSANE, Kelli and Amy coming to retrieve the kiddos and get them McDonald's, several friends showing up to see the baby, and me in tears because he wasn't coming fast enough and my epidural was NOT working. I remember being so frustrated and so done with ever having more kids. At that point if Jon even got near me- he would have lost his manhood....
Finally around 8 it was time to push. Which I did. I pushed until I couldn't push anymore. Over two and a half hours passed and no baby. My doctor (who had been off playing video games in the doctor's lounge) came in and told me if the baby wasn't born by 11- I was gonna have a c-section. I had been vomiting and needing oxygen and I think he wanted out more than I wanted him out. Really though, I think my doctor wanted to go home. I know I did.... I flat out refused to be cut open. So, I said a prayer- for strength and courage and had them turn off my epidural. All it was doing was making my legs numb, while I writhed in pain. (This is a result of scar tissue in my back and the very reason I am not sure I can have an epidural this go round.) I had little to no pain relief throughout the entire labor. Let me tell you- that prayer and my faith worked wonders, I felt like Xena the Warrior Princess or something. I pushed him out 16 minutes later! I was so relieved! And, as my mother in law will tell you my exact words were: "I am done- no more babies ever." I have never been so glad as I was then- he was beautiful and perfect and fat- 8lbs 3 oz, my biggest baby ever and a big shock after Chloe who weighed in at 6lbs 14 oz. It was a rough labor, I can't stress that enough. My memory has failed me about all the details but I do know most of my anxiety about labor is because with Hayden it was sooo bad.
So, I sit here this morning with freshly painted toes, smooth legs, and groceries. I only have a few little things on my list... and I am having some little contractions. I am almost positive it's not the real deal. It can't be, I have a list to finish first.

the kiddos, Hayden was about 18 hours old and look Chloe has on her new coat

Pig's Feet

So, I am willing for the sake of my blog to show y'all a picture of my cankles. In four pregnancies I have NEVER had swollen anything. I can wear my rings, high heels, etc. Well, my rings still fit but high heels are gonna have to wait awhile. Yes, I know I have a bunion and yes I desperately needed a pedicure when the pic with the black toenails was taken. I got one last night but unfortunately it did nothing for the swelling. If anything it's worse. Without further ado, my feet:

Thursday evening


Saturday afternoon

Back to the OB she went.....

So, today I went in for another check-up. Seriously- bad experience... First I was late and was courteous enough to call. That idiotic receptionist tried to tell me if I was more than 15 minutes late he would have to reschedule! Really? What about all the times he made me wait over an hour?? I managed to slip in a whopping 4 minutes late! Miraculously, I was called back within 5 minutes. Where I was promptly weighed, I am up 1.5 more pounds, wowza! The minute I got in the room I told my nurse exactly what I thought of the receptionist, it rhymes with witch. Then she told me my Group B Strep test was positive. Which made my blood pressure climb to 140/90 and my feet to swell like balloons! Ok, my feet were already swollen but still! They did get bigger, much bigger. I am sensing lots of rubber flip flop days in my future. Anyway, back to the point- Of course I was sitting there panicking about the strep test because I had Googled it the other day and it scared the bejeezus out of me! That didn't help matters one bit! Then that silly nurse asked me if I wanted to be checked for dilation and effacement!! I said to her: "of course I do, don't all doctors check at 36 weeks on?" And she acted like I was WEIRD! That got me even hotter! Anyway, he finally came in and molested my cervix with his big fat fingers. Which was horribly painful and not at all something I care to do again. I think I may tell her no next week when she asks if I want to be checked. She might wet her freaking scrubs. Anyway... to make a long blog post short- I am dilated 1 to 2 centimeters and starting to efface a TINY bit. Which sounds promising if you are going to give birth to a Lee press on nail... As of now, I am on strict doctor's orders to rest with a vat of bon-bons and some cheesy television. Which I fully plan on obeying ;)

P.S. After I calmed down a bit I had my blood pressure checked again and it was down to 122/76 so that's good!

Wondering-

how the kids are handling the first day of school, particularly Chloe. Today was her first day of middle school. I am really hoping Hunter helped her out today... it's nice that they are in the same school again this year.

if I can get all of my last minute nesting done before baby.

how many more chocolate chip muffins I can eat before I get sick to my stomach, hmmm... also, if the chocolate I got on my white shirt will come out.

when I am gonna go into labor, how it will start, how long it will take, and if I can manage without the epidural.

what the baby looks like, if I really want to name him what we have discussed, and if he has hair.

if I will find the mental energy to load the very few pictures I took of the first day back to school.

if my kids realize for the first time in their entire lives that I forgot to put notes in their lunches- it's been a tradition since they started kindergarten. I feel terrible about forgetting....

if Chloe is gonna have a good year. Middle school is when girls become Mean Girls and I can't stand the thought of ANYONE being mean to my Chloe girl.

if Jon will surprise me with the fluffy chocolate brown glider rocker I have been begging for.

if Swine Flu is gonna be as bad as they are saying- kinda scary... supposedly flu season starts in a few weeks. Yikes!

if I can get my last minute errands run before baby.

and lastly- if anyone is reading this and if so are you bored yet?

on going to the OB....

With pregnancy comes frequent trips to the OB, as we all know. The first visit is fun- you're having a BABY! And, if you're lucky you get a sonogram picture of your little peanut. The next several visits are pretty uneventful, not counting the monthly heartbeat check. For me it's an opportunity to wear a cute maternity outfit and some makeup and if I'm real lucky- my husband will take me to lunch afterwards. It's the visits that come from 36 weeks on that STINK! And, today was no exception. Even though my doctor should have technically checked my "progress" last week- he chose to put it off.... not sure why? I had already gotten up at the butt crack of dawn (8:00) yesterday and after sitting there for 30 minutes I was sent home because he had an emergency c-section to attend to. I was so peeved. So, I head back today and am relieved to be the first patient. It's when I get to the ladies room to leave a urine sample that I realize that my underwear are on inside out... lovely. I get on the scale- where I am up 2 pounds after losing 2 the week before, even lovelier. The nurse takes me to a room and says "well, he's not here yet so"... I pretty much tuned her out at that point because I am afraid I might curse at her and then I hear- "he's probably not gonna check your progress today anyway." Ugghhh, are you freaking serious?! I shaved for nothing?! But, she does tell me he is gonna do a swab for Group B strep- which requires me to be naked anyway. And I am thinking- dude, just check me please! He finally shows up and dang it if he doesn't want to chit chat! About his son's recent fender bender, school clothes, tax free shopping and on and on, before you know it an hour has passed! FINALLY he tells me he will check me in addition to the swab and heartbeat- YES! (On a sidenote- I can't believe I am excited to have a stranger examine my girly bits). He leaves and I quick drop trou, making sure to right the wrong undies for when I slip them back on. And, then I kid you not I hear his office door shut where he proceeds to have a meeting with his office manager! FOR almost 30 WHOLE MINUTES! And, I sit there fuming. Wanting to tiptoe my naked butt to the magazine rack that's 3 feet away for an outdated Family Circle to read, or wishing my phone was closer so I could text someone- anyone! But, the fear of being caught keeps me from getting off the table. So, I sit there and wonder where all those spider veins came from and how my recently pedicured feet got so dry and is my butt hanging out and... TWENTY SEVEN minutes later he comes back in and lickety split does everything while talking about football season for his boys- with really cold hands I might add. It literally took him 3 whole minutes to tell me- I AM NOT DILATED. I leave the office crampy and cranky. When I see that I have 15 minutes to get breakfast before Chick-Fil-A stops serving I speed through the parking lot with my debit card in hand. And, not only do I get served an old stringy chicken biscuit- the woman gives me the wrong drink AND drops my debit card UNDER my van! Oh man, what a morning! I knew at that point if I didn't get home and take a nap that my day was gonna continue to go down the tubes. I am a pessimist that way... I am pleased to report that after a 3 hour nap I am chipper and alert and ready to hit the mall for school clothes. Wow, did I just say that?

WARNING: Labor Inducer

Here's a picture of Jon's truck.

It's an '04 Harley Davidson edition F-250. Or in another words, more effective than Pitocin. Seriously in about three weeks if the baby still hasn't made an appearance, I am going cruising in this bad boy. Because the last two times I have driven it I have had some pretty intense Braxton Hicks contractions. It might be partly due to the crappy asphalt roads out here in the boonies, but the combination of the two are sure to get labor started. Definitely I won't be driving it again for at least 21 days. He is NOT ALLOWED to be born til after Labor Day.

yet even more pics of baby related stuff.....

So, as I said before I am working on the baby's room in spurts. Other than two adorable wall hangings/goodies that are being made by Amy and Sarah, I am done with my part- Labor & Delivery not included. I also FINALLY received my CUTE diaper bag that I ordered off of Etsy, so of course I have to show that off too. So far my favorite things in there are the pics that Chloe and Hayden painted! Anyway- here are some more pics of the goings on in the nursery.
As soon as I get the other stuff and hang it, I will post AGAIN... I can't help myself! I am in love with this room!

number cards (these are above the closet)


number cards


number cards


Chloe's tree she painted for baby (this is above the crib)


Hayden's masterpiece for baby (this is also above the crib)


DOTS!


diaper bag/purse


close up of crib quilt


quilt again...

Trying to be Positive Patsy when I feel like Negative Nancy.....

Ok, so first of all I feel like I should say thanks and sorry at the same time. I feel like I complain ALOT on here and I am grateful for the sweet comments when I do. I guess it's easier to type my feelings as opposed to writing them in a journal. And, I am pretty sure the people around me are tired of hearing me complain, so my internet "audience" gets to hear me rant.
That being said, this last month of pregnancy is doing a number on me. I am sooo stressed it's pathetic. I have ALOT of school shopping left to do, baby stuff that needs my attention, and 4 bored kids. And, to top it all off- Chandler (my oldest child of broken bones, torn ligaments, staph infection fame) has injured himself YET AGAIN...! This time he dislocated his elbow, which doesn't seem that bad to me but what do I know? He had to be taken to the ER where they put him under to put the elbow back in place and is now in a sling for who knows how long and will miss about 6 weeks of his Senior year of Varsity football. Already he is driving me NUTS! Bored, hungry, etc. every 15 minutes. He is on Vicodin ES which has made him pretty much unable to help me by watching the kids so I can get school shopping and planning done. I have been stuck at home for 3 days and I guess I might be having a hormonal woe is me cabin fever kind of thing going on.
Plus, I am FREAKING out worse than ever about childbirth. I made the mistake of reading about unmedicated natural childbirth and I am absolutely scared to DEATH!! I am assuming the fact that I know he has to come out somehow is making me antsy. Really, do they still put you under and deliver the baby? That way I can wake up and he's here! I don't really want to do that, but as each day ticks by I am getting more and more anxious. Not even chocolate is helping.... I think I am quite possibly driving Jon bonkers as well. And, he is the most laid back person I know. In addition to all of that I can't wake up before 11 each morning and I am taking naps right after dinner each evening. Will things ever be back to normal? Really though, what is normal? Anyway, thanks yet again for listening. I am off to take a mid-afternoon bubble bath. Wish me luck and stuff.

Picture OVERLOAD: nesting, re-decorating, and misc...

Ok, so I am finally able to post some pics of all the SUPER HARD STRESSFUL work I've been doing around the house. I am pretty much done with everyone's rooms but the baby's which is ironic because I had this brilliant idea to play musical bedrooms because he was coming.... I have more big plans and cute ideas for the nursery and hope to get started tomorrow, wish me luck!! Anyway- just a short rundown: Hayden's room used to be Chloe's and was pink/cottage green Shabby Chic decor. The baby's room used to be Chan's and was brown and blue stripes, Chloe's room used to be Hunter and Hayden's and was blue, orange, and brown surf. The big boy's room was our home theatre/game room (which was our garage when we moved in) and was purple, black, red, with black carpet, home theatre decor, etc. And, lastly the bathroom was tropical blue surf overload. I'm afraid a little thing called $$ or lack of has put my living room/kitchen plans on hold for awhile but I am pleased with the looks of things so far. All right now- give me some honest feedback.

Big Boy's room


books and stuff


TV watching seats


close-up of bed


room from doorway



picture in kid's bathroom (reminds kids to conserve water- ha, ha, ha...)


mirror and cool towels


shower curtain in kid's bathroom which inpsired everything else


Hayden's book nook


Hayden's room- decorations, TV with Zumiez stickers (skater must have....)


more decor, decals, TV


Hayden's bed (I chose comforter, he picked paint)


Chloe's dresser and chair


dresser (Jon refinished this, it was cottage green with rose knobs)


shelves full of goodies, love the curtains


the bed and new duvet (she chose decor and colors based on the duvet)


crib full of sheets, bumper, etc. (waiting til the last possible minute because the cat has already tried to claim ownership...)


drawerful of goodies


closet (trying to organize...)


bouncer/stuffed animals


crib (again waiting til the last minute to get ready because the cat thinks this is his room...)


lonely shelves (trying to decide what to put on it)


shelves of cute stuff


changing table

Baby Showers!

Me and the baby (and Jon) were recently the guests of honor at not one but TWO baby showers. They were thrown by my sweet sister Kelli and two sweet friends, Erin and Sarah. One was for my friends from Grand Prairie and Arlington and one was for our couple friends. And, these ladies went all out. We're not just talking cake and punch here. We're talking FOOD, FAVORS, AWESOME CAKE, DECORATIONS! And, these sneaky ladies not only planned and hosted a great party- they gave me gifts too. Which, they will be getting spanked for.... as soon as I have some energy to do so. I specifically told them no gifts if they hosted the shower, but they didn't listen. I had a great time at both showers and I think Jon had a pretty swell time as well, he did pretty good for his first ever baby shower! I am just so thankful for my friends and family, that I was all mushy both days. I was able to score enough clothes, blankets, diapers, toys, sheets, and all manner of fun things that baby boy is spoiled already! I was also able to get a ton of gift cards that I am gonna put towards some of my bigger items. Thanks again for a great time! I am a lucky girl to have such an amazing support system. I have but a few photos, I was too busy eating and talking to take very many. But, I know for sure Miss Sarah has some great ones over at her blog. She was able to get pics of all the cute decorations. Check it out here. I may be able to scam some from Erin sometime too, we'll see.

P.S. I do believe I am in the home stretch....!

about to open our loot at couple's shower (gotta love my hips, they were made for birthing babies or so it appears)


cutting the cake (aww, just like our wedding day)


kiss, kiss (they made us)


me and Miss Chloe at my girls only soiree

Thirty Six-

days left to be pregnant

days left to pee every 15 minutes

rolls of toilet paper

doses of Pepcid AC

times to be allowed to nap and not feel guilty

days to have fattening cravings

days to watch my baby kick and squirm in my belly

days where it's ok to have a fat belly

days to avoid the litter box

days to be a human oven during a Texas summer

days to have thick luxurious hair

days to wear maternity undies

days to not have to worry about birth control

more days of morning sickness (crossing fingers)

more foot rubs

more days to make my kids to more chores than normal

more times I can use pregnancy as an excuse for anything

and, BONUS- I'll be 36 on my next birthday!